So many different views on this but thought I would add one more element to my original question and see if that changes the way you currently view dating before final dissolution of your marriage......
Would YOU date someone who is S but D not final?
Now, would YOU date them if they also told you they were still living with their STBX doing the in house S?
I know I certainly would not & this would raise a red flag for me about this person's values. I would also worry that I might start to really care for this person & there could be a possibility they might R and then it would cause me the pains of a breakup.
Guess I am just trying to look at this from all different angles because it is on my mind again.