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Newest Member: brierpatch (45434)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Five years later
wishingitwasnt
♂ Member
Member # 20380
Default  Posted: 1:22 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thought you all might like to share an email from XWW.

I sure do miss you when it comes time to make decisions. Turns out I'm this kind of indecisive person. We were better as a team. I'm just pretty lame on my own. You were my best friend for 28 years...There's got to be SOMETHING about me you miss?

I’ve been divorced for 5 years and about a month (d-day#1 was 6 years ago). And no, at this point there is nothing that comes to mind that I miss about her.

My youngest turned 18 last month. Child support ended. My oldest had a major falling out with her mother this summer. XWW has periodically pitched a fit and caused some drama with efforts to draw me in via text or email. I usually don’t respond at all. Then other times I’ll get little communications like this. I definitely will not respond.

Her plan to marry a millionaire hasn’t worked out, yet (she actually told my daughter that was her plan to support herself shortly after the divorce). Sadly for her, I am not available. That train left the station five years ago. They’ve already pulled up the tracks and put in a bike trail.

I'm doing ok.


Posts: 2763 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: IA
ChangeMaker
♂ Member
Member # 43899
Default  Posted: 1:28 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

They’ve already pulled up the tracks and put in a bike trail.

BWAAAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I'm gonna use this one!


"Everything works if you let it." - Travis W. Redfish

DDay - June 7, 2014
Me - 43
WW - 41
DD - 6 and 3
Pulling the Plug


Posts: 362 | Registered: Jun 2014 | From: Ontario
norabird
♀ Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 1:42 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Can you imagine still being with someone who would write this? She is pretty lame, period.


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4196 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
Thefly559
♂ Member
Member # 40268
Default  Posted: 1:49 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

wishingitwasnt thank you for this post!


"what does not kill you , makes you stronger"

Posts: 690 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: nyc
brokenheartinga
♀ New Member
Member # 41142
Default  Posted: 1:51 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Love that quote. So glad to hear
you are doing great.
Now if I could get there.


***Go with your gut***

Posts: 16 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Ga
Forged1
♂ Member
Member # 43418
Default  Posted: 1:51 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sadly for her, I am not available. That train left the station five years ago. They’ve already pulled up the tracks and put in a bike trail.

I am in awe of your awesomeness.


Me: BH - 30s
Her: WW - 30s

Married - 2008
PA with boss for at least 5 months in 2013, possibly longer.
DDay - Feb 2014
Separated, heading to D
==================================
At this stage, I'm pretty much bulletproof.


Posts: 307 | Registered: May 2014 | From: USA
Williesmom
♀ Member
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 1:55 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wiw!!! So glad to see you, and so glad that you're enjoying the bike trail.

I'm glad that you're doing ok.


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7781 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
Pass
♂ Member
Member # 38122
Default  Posted: 1:57 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

And you, my friend, are living the dream. We can only hope that your unavailability hurts her as much (or more if that's possible) as you were hurt by her.


Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
Two sons: Now 11 and 14
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after 17 year marriage, now divorcing!

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous


Posts: 2138 | Registered: Jan 2013
10yearsafter
♂ Member
Member # 43139
Default  Posted: 6:14 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh I would have replied. Is there something you miss about me. Reply "NO not a damn thing"

Posts: 218 | Registered: Apr 2014 | From: Texas
travels
♀ Member
Member # 20334
Default  Posted: 6:27 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good to see you Wishing!!!

Guess the grass wasn't greener...


When one door closes, another door opens. It's the journey through the hallway that sucks.

Posts: 3777 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: PA
mamazen
♀ Member
Member # 42137
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What a nice post to read! Here's hoping we all can reach the level of wisdom and indifference you have, someday.

Even now, WH will let slip that I am a deeper person than OW, he sees that now, etc etc etc. It just pisses me off. Someday I hope to be able to roll my eyes and look at my own bike path ahead of me.

Thanks for posting.


mamazen


me 56
WH 57
married 19 years
separated since 8/2013
D FINAL! Sept 10 2014
D-day Dec 21 2013 (after separation)
2 sons 15 and 12
OW = family friend and WH work colleague, going on many years (I was clueless)


Posts: 76 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: canada
FaithFool
♀ Member
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 8:21 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh, that's rich...

My x wouldn't dare bring up anything like that with me.

He's facing knee replacement surgery and has to navigate a disability insurance claim without the help of a wifey, who used to manage everything (including getting him on a kick-ass insurance plan for his self-employed ass).

He always hated paperwork and bureaucracy.

Too bad so sad. Time for the big boy pants at nearly 55.

Good to hear from you wishing!

[This message edited by FaithFool at 8:23 PM, August 19th (Tuesday)]


DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

Posts: 17589 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
wifehad5
♂ Moderator
Member # 15162
Default  Posted: 9:06 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm doing ok.


FBH - 42
FWW - 43 (BrokenRoad)
2 kids 7&12

The people you do your life with shape the life you live


Posts: 37461 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Michigan
Badhurt
♂ Member
Member # 41947
Default  Posted: 9:19 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Give her a real answer. Block her for your social media.
Maybe the. She will get it.
Congratulations!!!

Posts: 1097 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Eastern USA
stronger08
♂ Member
Member # 16953
Default  Posted: 8:39 AM, August 20th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah it really sucks when they get exactly what they thought they wanted. Reality beats the shit out of fantasy, each and every time.


You cant eat soup with chopsticks.

Posts: 5746 | Registered: Nov 2007
sparkysable
♀ Member
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 10:00 AM, August 20th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh? Poor XWW. Fantasyland not so fantastic anymore? That greener grass is actually spray-painted manure shavings? Such a shame.

Since you dont' often respond, I wouldn't be against a "No, not one thing" kind of a response.


D-day OW#1 2/2004; R for 6 years; D-day OW#2 5/2010

Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.


Posts: 3426 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
Topic Posts: 16

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