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Before marriage characteristics

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PeaceLily210 posted 11/16/2017 09:42 AM

Yes of course but I never knew how broken or how capable of self destruction and dishonesty he actually was.
I thought he loved me and respected our M enough not to have an A or hurt me. I was very wrong, the old saying you have to love yourself before you can truly love others is so true.

I believed that love was enough and that was my own undoing. Iíve learnt love is a verb. Iíve learnt that M requires honesty even if this means conflict. Iíve learnt that redemption doesnít happen overnight, requires consistency but is only felt in the present moment.

Onthejourney, word for word... I could have written this word for word.

I knew he dealt with low self esteem. Stupid me, I thought I could help him see his worth by loving him. I truly believed that he at least respected me enough not to treat me the way he has for the last few years.

There were red flags where the dishonestly was concerned... lying to his boss about why he was late for work... lying to a friend or family member about why we had to back out of an engagement... I never thought he could do this and lie to me like he has though.

DevastatedDee posted 11/16/2017 10:15 AM

There were red flags where the dishonestly was concerned... lying to his boss about why he was late for work... lying to a friend or family member about why we had to back out of an engagement... I never thought he could do this and lie to me like he has though.

That stuff, yeah. I think it highlights the biggest error in judgement that we all made. We assumed that they wouldn't treat us like they treated the others in their lives. That we were somehow special to them and exempt from that stuff.

That's maybe the biggest lesson I have learned from this. Assume that in time, a person will treat you the same ways that they treat others close to them.

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