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Its across the street

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lostcovenants posted 4/18/2018 08:49 AM

^^^ what Bigger said.

Today should be a relief for you - maybe even a happy day. But remember it may be a hard day for your boys.

I wish you happiness and a clean new start. You have mentioned that this is your second marriage to end due to infidelity. Double ((hugs)) for you. I can't imagine going through this hell twice.

And thank you LEO for all you do for the rest of us - every day.

LC

StillStanding1 posted 4/18/2018 09:06 AM

Bigger always says it best.

Just stopped in to say Iím thinking of you today. Glad you finally can turn this page. Just sorry she put you through all this. But, your new life awaits! Make it a great day!

Hugs to you and thank you also for your service.

Freeme posted 4/18/2018 13:12 PM

Any news?

RockstarDad posted 4/18/2018 16:41 PM

Went home early and got some sleep (assisted) woke up early and felt good. Dressed up nice. Cried a little bit on the way to court (teary eyed) but I had enough time before so you couldn't tell.

She was there early. I waited around the corner. We signed the financials and the attorney said she was really cold and asked if she was always like that.

Went in and the judge pretty much said she could get a lot more and ahe was worried about the fairness. Was able to explain it enough that she let it go.

Both had to testify line by line that we agreed to the seperate items. She was teary eyed the whole time and I was fine but avoided eye contact.

Only thing that changed was she now wants to keep my last name. I never asked I just put it in the paperwork. Irritated but it's a small thing.

Felt a relief when judge pronounced us divorced. Whew, battle won.

Asked her if ahe was still going to give me the wedding ring and she started to tear up and my attorney said we could do that later I think as a save to her. She started to cry and walked out.

Went next door to HR and dropped her from health insurance. Made a call to the auto insurance and dropped her truck. She knows about the health insurance but I wonder if she will think about the auto. The day before she had to ask me what the judges name was and the room #...she is not high functioning...It's on all the paperwork. Good Lord.

Went to the place I proposed had a glass of wine and pitched my ring in the river. Closure. At peace.

If the mods say it's ok I will post a link to the vid of the ring disposal.

All I got left is to thank the OM and that's it. I got the rest of this life in the bag.

Thanks for all the support. I don't know how I would have managed without it. Life's different but it's going to be good. It's not the path I chose but it leads to happiness and that and my children are all I need.

Onward to the next chapter!

skins21 posted 4/18/2018 16:45 PM

Congrats on finally ending this crappy chapter of your life. Onwards and upwards! The sky is the limit.

annb posted 4/18/2018 16:45 PM

Hey, RockstarDad, you rock!

Godspeed to you and your family.

One day at a time, just one day.

Have you ventured into the Separation/Divorce forum? Great members down there who will support you.

Also the New Beginnings forum has a great deal of support for those trying to navigate life post-divorce.

((((RSD))))

goalong posted 4/18/2018 16:53 PM

every end is a new begingning, When it is the end of a bad deal, it is a great begingning

fareast posted 4/18/2018 16:56 PM

Congrats and well done! Given the shit sandwich you were given you did extremely well. Your kids are lucky to have you. Strength to you moving forward.

RockstarDad posted 4/18/2018 17:05 PM

So went over and dropped of kids school folder. Talked to her and asked if she was giving the ring. She said she waa keeping it. Said that's fine. She said she was keeping it for the kids. I said I don't care what you do with it that's fine.

Asked to speak with OM. She asked why. I said I just had something to tell him. She said no and I said I would just catch him outside sometime and walked away. I felt pretty chipper she seemed sad and had a hard time looking at me but did.

Ran into the neighbor getting the mail and OM comes out. I said I just want to thank you for showing me who she is. I can't imagine having spent another 5 10 15 years with her and you showed me who she is and In have you to thank for that. I turned and then turned back and said oh one more thing. If my kids are ever hurt and I think it has something to do with drinking or negligence I will over here before your head can spin. He says you know I would never do anything to the kids. I say well my 9 year old told me how he would wake up during the night and couldnt find mom, I wonder where she was. He hangs his head as I walked away.

Got a little angry toned talking about the kids, but handled it pretty well. Done.

[This message edited by RockstarDad at 5:10 PM, April 18th (Wednesday)]

StillStanding1 posted 4/18/2018 17:07 PM

Glad you finally have that peace! The door is now closed and the window is wide open! May the rest of your life be blessed with joy. Enjoy your kiddos and embrace this new chapter in your life!

Edit: Sorry. Cross posted with your last update. Glad you got your closure with OM. Let him slink away. At least he had the decency to hang his head. Bastard. I canít help but be confused at why she wanted to keep your last name.....

Just so glad you are finally free of this. Go treat yourself to something good tonight.

[This message edited by StillStanding1 at 5:11 PM, April 18th (Wednesday)]

RockstarDad posted 4/18/2018 17:16 PM

Name thing was probably something to do with the kids or out of spite. Spite for what I don't know. Shit she made up in her head. She knows she is wrong, he knows he is wrong they are just to weak to do the right things in life and to put the effort in to be good people and that is why they won't be a part of mine other than to do what I need to do as a father.

beenthereinco posted 4/18/2018 17:19 PM

I canít help but be confused at why she wanted to keep your last name.....

If she is going to marry the OM soon she may have just wanted to go through one set of name changes rather than two. It is a pain to do all of that.

RockstarDad posted 4/18/2018 17:23 PM

There's always that too. There circus.

Wool94 posted 4/18/2018 17:33 PM

I'm happy for you RSD! I'll be praying for your and your children.

beenthereinco posted 4/18/2018 18:13 PM

There's always that too. There circus.

That's a good attitude. Sorry if my post seemed a little flippant. I'm sure that would bug you to see them married immediately even with the way you've been able to disengage.

Did the OM get divorced as well? I know his wife left pretty quickly when all this came out.

RockstarDad posted 4/18/2018 18:40 PM

The OBS goes next Monday for there final hearing.

No apologies needed I thought about that already. They have to wait 6 months here by law. I was kinda curious so I looked at her left hand and no engagement ring yet or she took it off. My prediction is they go somewhere warm and get married on a beach next late fall or early winter.

If they break up by Christmas I offered to send some people some intoxicating spirits.

MidnightRun posted 4/18/2018 19:02 PM

She's his problem now.

One of them will cheat before sundown.

rambler posted 4/18/2018 20:31 PM

Given OM had a wedding not even a year ago for a marriage that lasted less than a month I would not expect much of a fan fair for the wedding.

You dumped your new wife for a !married woman you barely knew. She has two kids from two different men and is five years older.

If I am someone who shelled out for the last one, I would not spend money to go to a destination wedding.

Everyone sees this for what it is.

Live well. Fix you.i

sensibletinch posted 4/18/2018 21:25 PM

Happy for you. Thanks for the update!

PricklePatch posted 4/18/2018 21:54 PM

I would,notify her about auto it could affect the kid.

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