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User Topic: Anyone read "Guys are Waffles, Girls are Spaghetti"?
MovingUpward
Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 8:20 PM, February 11th (Thursday)

Is this a good book for teens?


ETA I've finished reading this book, and I think that it is great. It maybe even great for Tweens. There is a small study guide in the back that you should point out to the intended reader.

[This message edited by MovingUpward at 9:24 AM, February 17th (Wednesday)]


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51851 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
traicionada
Member
Member # 10310
Default  Posted: 5:17 AM, February 12th (Friday)

Not sure My BAN coordinator recommended it last yesterday but since I'm a waffle by training (btw, I totally blame my parents for it) I pass on the book offer. I'm schedule to see her next week so I'll ask and let you know what she thinks
As far as a I know it has a clean inspiring message. It even made into the RC book list


Real love is a CHOICE, NOT a feeling...

Posts: 3264 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Dallas, Texas
incredulous
Member
Member # 16737
Default  Posted: 9:57 PM, February 13th (Saturday)

I haven't read it, but my counselor recommended it to me at one point. Not sure if it's good for teens.

ETA: I just looked on
Amazon, and surprisingly, there are two books with very similar names. This book, by Chad Eastham, is written for teens, according to the description. The book which I think was actually recommended by my counselor is "Men are Like Waffles; Women are Like Spaghetti" by Bill Farrell.

Who would have ever guessed there would be two books with such similar titles??

[This message edited by incredulous at 10:05 PM, February 13th (Saturday)]


me: BW, now 52;
DD now 16 (adopted by me as single mom, so XWH was "Dad")
married: June, 2005, together since July, 2002
d-day: 10/21/07;
Divorced July, 2008 and he never looked back...

Posts: 1208 | Registered: Oct 2007
MovingUpward
Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 10:53 PM, February 13th (Saturday)

Well i picked up the Chad Eastham authored book. Chad worked with Bill and Pan Farrel in converting the adult book to a teen format. I'm going to read it before deciding to give it to my DD.


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51851 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
Hope24
Member
Member # 9344
Default  Posted: 6:32 AM, February 14th (Sunday)

Okay, now I'm curious, what is this book about?


She packed up her potential and all she had learned and headed out to change a few things.

Posts: 7605 | Registered: Jan 2006 | From: Poolside
MovingUpward
Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 7:35 AM, February 14th (Sunday)

Insights about why guys and girls think and act so differently.

The version by Chad Eastham is written with teens in mind, so I was thinking about it for my teen and upcoming tweens. It might not be as detailed and "clinical" but it maybe "entertaining" enough for them to learn something.

I'll give an update when I'm finished with it


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51851 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
Threnody
Member
Member # 1558
Default  Posted: 10:09 AM, February 14th (Sunday)

I'd like to read your thoughts on it when you've finished it, Moo. Birdie Sue is starting to ask some questions about "Why do boys...?" and I also have friends with 11-14 year olds who are struggling with some of these same issues. I figure I'm going to be reading everything that comes down the pike, but I'd especially like your take on that book. I came across it before and was intrigued.


“If you don't like my opinion of you, you can always improve.” ~ Ashleigh Brilliant
"Great love requires determination." ~ tryingtwo
"Don't try to win over the haters, you're not the jackass whisperer." ~ Brene Brown

Posts: 14040 | Registered: Jun 2003 | From: Middle-of-Diddly, TX
Rise_Above
Member
Member # 23674
Default  Posted: 10:21 AM, February 14th (Sunday)

Me to! Me to! *waiting for report*


You can live the way you believe this is your opportunity to let your life be one that lights the way~F.Battistelli

*****
God's hand was an avocado branch


Posts: 14226 | Registered: Apr 2009 | From: Chrys a lis
MovingUpward
Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 11:25 PM, February 14th (Sunday)

OK I am on page 54 of 200+ pages and I have laughed several times but he (Chad) is doing well in describing the differences.


Guys - waffles - lots of boxes (aka compartmentalization)

Girls - spaghetti - every issue touches other issues and are connected

Quote from the book describing a lost boy listening to a talkative girl.

Either he doesn't understand, or he doesn't know how to make the conversation work. For a guy, it's like being in the middle of a hockey game; you are playing hard and following the rules, but then suddenly the rules change and the puck is gone and the score is measured in smiley faces. And then miniature horses come out onto the ice and start galloping all miniature horse-like! And suddenly all the other players start singing songs in unison and yelling, "We're winning, we're winning!" (I have had nightmares like that.) This is how lost guys can feel when they are trying to follow along with a talkative girl. There isn't a right or wrong way; we're just very different.


Chad does bring God into the discussion and so far the mention of Adam and Eve.

He encourages girls not to look to define their significance in men, but in God.

Guys are there to appreciate and affirm your significance, not create it.

So far
Chapter 1 -- forces the reader to recognize that guys and girls like different things

Chapter 2 -- defines the different thinking styles of guys (waffle) and girls (spaghetti)

Chapter 3 -- a quick biology lesson covering chromosomes, when in the gestation period does the Y chromosome change the course of development. Parts of the brain and how guys brains are different from girls brains.

Chapter 4 -- a focus on girls traits and needs

So at 1/4 of the way through I am giving this two thumbs up for teens. (BTW Chad spills the beans about Santa)

I have enjoyed the humor mixed in with facts and studies. A very easy read for kids. I have enjoyed the occassion but not overwhelming reminders that God loves you. And the common theme of different but equal.

[This message edited by MovingUpward at 12:27 AM, February 15th (Monday)]


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51851 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
Threnody
Member
Member # 1558
Default  Posted: 8:40 AM, February 15th (Monday)

It sounds good so far (ponies! yay!) I really love this:

Guys are there to appreciate and affirm your significance, not create it.

Rock on.


“If you don't like my opinion of you, you can always improve.” ~ Ashleigh Brilliant
"Great love requires determination." ~ tryingtwo
"Don't try to win over the haters, you're not the jackass whisperer." ~ Brene Brown

Posts: 14040 | Registered: Jun 2003 | From: Middle-of-Diddly, TX
MovingUpward
Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 2:08 PM, February 15th (Monday)

Discussing guys and anger

Anger is not usually just anger, by the way. It's common cover-up feeling. In counseling, as soon as you ask a guy who says he is angry how he feels, the lid comes off. You discover that anger covers up that he feels hurt, neglected, unintelligent, and unloved.

Many guys seek constant affirmation from things and people through means of money, sex, power, and influence -- but these things will never leave them satisfied or secure. Ego should be healthy confidence, security, and strength, but again, not alwas the case.

OK first mention of Jesus Christ (not a problem for me)

We have a new, perfect example of what it means to be a guy. In him, we see all the intended guy traits that were designed by God, and we have the choice to use them as God intended rather than to pervert them. . . . . . He was self-sacrificing, he was great to his friends, and he lived a life of adventure. He was also ridiculously good at fishing.

Chapter 5 is about guys in general

Chapter 6 is about communication/body language

Chapter 7 More communication
When love is spoken and not shown, it breaks relationships down instead of building them up

[This message edited by MovingUpward at 6:15 PM, February 15th (Monday)]


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51851 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
MovingUpward
Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 9:58 PM, February 16th (Tuesday)

Chapter 8 Dating

When it comes to dating, romance, and love, here is what you owe people: nothing. Love and dating should not be forced, and pressure doesn't exist in healthy relationships.

. . . .the point of dating is: getting to know someone over an extended amount of time to determine if a romantic relationship is something worrth pursuing. I thought if I said this twice, you might remember it more.

Relationships are suppose to be good.

People shouldn't walk away from marriage, but dating is not marriage.


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51851 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
MovingUpward
Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 10:27 PM, February 16th (Tuesday)

I could probably just talk to myself and make up stuff here on the lonely thread.


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51851 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
Rise_Above
Member
Member # 23674
Default  Posted: 12:05 AM, February 17th (Wednesday)

I could probably just talk to myself and make up stuff here on the lonely thread

when you start talking about pink dresses and slumber parties with curlers I know you have gone off the deep end.

The book sounds great. I think I shall have to invest in it for my Rays!


You can live the way you believe this is your opportunity to let your life be one that lights the way~F.Battistelli

*****
God's hand was an avocado branch


Posts: 14226 | Registered: Apr 2009 | From: Chrys a lis
MovingUpward
Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 9:31 AM, February 17th (Wednesday)

Chapter 9 Are you ready to date?

Chapter 10 Dealing with Conflict

Chapter 11 Sex (done very nicely)

Chapter 12 How to Fail (tips to help the kids not to fail)

Chapter 13 "Your Brain Doesn't Work . . . Completely"
points out that the development of the frontal lobe is ongoing until 25 and what that means.

A whole bunch of great info written toward a young audience. It is entertaining while instructive. If your child takes away only 10% of the what is discussed it is worth getting them to read it.

I am going to have to search for the original version written for Adults to see if the Farrels cite the studies that Eastham alludes to in his book.

On a scale of 1 to 10, I give it an 11.

[This message edited by MovingUpward at 9:54 AM, February 17th (Wednesday)]


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51851 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
Rise_Above
Member
Member # 23674
Default  Posted: 10:49 AM, February 17th (Wednesday)

wow, only two ones ..lol! So the original book, is that Men are french toast and women are lasagna?


You can live the way you believe this is your opportunity to let your life be one that lights the way~F.Battistelli

*****
God's hand was an avocado branch


Posts: 14226 | Registered: Apr 2009 | From: Chrys a lis
MovingUpward
Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 12:21 PM, February 17th (Wednesday)

Adult book (by Farrel)

Men are like Waffles, Women are like Spaghetti


Teen book (By Eastham and Farrel)

Guys are Waffles, Girls are Spaghetti


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51851 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
Rise_Above
Member
Member # 23674
Default  Posted: 1:31 PM, February 17th (Wednesday)

Wow....they get 2 points for originality on two different titles

K-thanks Moo!! Will look them up.


You can live the way you believe this is your opportunity to let your life be one that lights the way~F.Battistelli

*****
God's hand was an avocado branch


Posts: 14226 | Registered: Apr 2009 | From: Chrys a lis
woundedby2
Member
Member # 18522
Default  Posted: 1:35 PM, February 17th (Wednesday)

Sounds like a great book! Is the one that was on the Perks sale rack at the book store?


Me: BS
2 kids: DD15 and DS18
Him: The Assclown NPD
OW: "friend" of 15 years
Divorced! Feb. 2010

Everybody, soon or late, sits down to a banquet of consequences.
~Robert Louis Stevenson


Posts: 7791 | Registered: Mar 2008 | From: SoCal
dreamlife
Member
Member # 8142
Default  Posted: 6:10 AM, April 29th (Thursday)

This title really grabbed me!


~XWH told me what I wanted to hear but he always did whatever he wanted to do~

Posts: 25407 | Registered: Sep 2005
silverhopes
Member
Member # 32753
Default  Posted: 11:15 PM, November 1st (Thursday)

He was self-sacrificing, he was great to his friends, and he lived a life of adventure. He was also ridiculously good at fishing.


Find peace. Or sleep on it.
Sometimes my monkeys, sometimes my circus. Be mindful, compassionate, and responsible… Something valuable I learned on SI. :)

Posts: 3900 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: California
StillGoing
Member
Member # 28571
Default  Posted: 11:16 AM, November 2nd (Friday)

Either he doesn't understand, or he doesn't know how to make the conversation work. For a guy, it's like being in the middle of a hockey game; you are playing hard and following the rules, but then suddenly the rules change and the puck is gone and the score is measured in smiley faces. And then miniature horses come out onto the ice and start galloping all miniature horse-like! And suddenly all the other players start singing songs in unison and yelling, "We're winning, we're winning!" (I have had nightmares like that.) This is how lost guys can feel when they are trying to follow along with a talkative girl. There isn't a right or wrong way; we're just very different.

The ponies should be robot dinosaurs and instead of smiley faces they're angry clowns with pancake cannons. It's not a nightmare until you realize the puck is a small fusion reactor and the net somehow transcends spacetime and you're looking into your own mouth, but you can't stop because... you have no idea, you just can't. Then the dinosaurs are screaming because you skated over them, but your skates are chainsaws and the clowns are really FBI agents knocking at your front door asking where are your children? and you think not again, I don't know sir, why? We believe they're responsible for breaking the moon this time.


“Fate is a fickle bitch who dotes on irony.”

Posts: 7419 | Registered: May 2010 | From: USA
Rebreather
Member
Member # 30817
Default  Posted: 12:33 PM, November 2nd (Friday)

Considering I have a 16 year old who has been dating the same boy for 8 months, I think maybe we need this book.


Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Recovering.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi

Posts: 6353 | Registered: Jan 2011
painpaingoaway
Member
Member # 27196
Default  Posted: 4:53 PM, November 2nd (Friday)

Wow! Sounds like a great book. Thanks Moo for the review! I have some teenage nieces and nephews. This sounds like a good Christmas gift idea.


me BS female 56/him WS 59
Married 33 years
D-day July 09/he gave me his slut's STD
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

Posts: 7035 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South
silverhopes
Member
Member # 32753
Default  Posted: 10:35 AM, December 8th (Saturday)

This thread motivated me to buy the book as something lighthearted and informative to read. I'm about 2/3 through it. Everything MovingUpward said.

Yes, it does seem like a really good book for teens. I wish I had it when I was a teen. It might have made the whole thing a little less confusing/lonely. I'll probably pass it on to my son when he's old enough.

[This message edited by silverhopes at 10:36 AM, December 8th (Saturday)]


Find peace. Or sleep on it.
Sometimes my monkeys, sometimes my circus. Be mindful, compassionate, and responsible… Something valuable I learned on SI. :)

Posts: 3900 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: California
Topic Posts: 25