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User Topic: Silver Linings Playbook
0115
Member
Member # 31740
Default  Posted: 5:28 PM, January 25th (Friday)

Has anyone seen it...is it really hard to watch?


BS (me) 49
FWH 49 newbeg2011
Married 29 years
Very Long LTA
DD 01/15/11-6/30/11
The hard work is done...let the healing begin.

Posts: 1004 | Registered: Apr 2011
LonelyHusband
Member
Member # 34145
Default  Posted: 6:35 PM, January 25th (Friday)

certainly wouldn't advise it for new BSs


BS ( me) 41
fWS (OktoberMest) 35
D day #1 29/10/2011, D day #2 15/112011, D day #3 15/03/2012
Reconciling.
“It’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”, is inadequate consolation when you vacuum up a child's hamster'

Posts: 1290 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: UK
0115
Member
Member # 31740
Default  Posted: 9:37 PM, January 25th (Friday)

Thanks lonely!


BS (me) 49
FWH 49 newbeg2011
Married 29 years
Very Long LTA
DD 01/15/11-6/30/11
The hard work is done...let the healing begin.

Posts: 1004 | Registered: Apr 2011
persevere
Member
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 9:47 PM, January 25th (Friday)

I'm two years out from DDay so I got thru it but it did hit me a bit. I think it caused me to view Bradley Coopers perspective differently than another might have.
Great movie.


Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling


Posts: 4471 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
sad12008
Member
Member # 18179
Default  Posted: 11:10 PM, January 25th (Friday)

I haven't seen it, but want to. Didn't know infidelity was involved (assuming it is from your post), but I know it involves BPD which definitely strikes very close to home. I've heard about it from that angle from others who have BP spouses.

Kinda glad for the heads up that it might be triggery for a BS...or fBS.


"Everybody's life is hard. You look at life, and it's not a cakewalk. You've got to be able to bounce back." --Neil Young, father to two children with CP, another with epilepsy, and otherwise experientially qualified to comment

Posts: 3863 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: a new start together
MissMovingOn
Member
Member # 30720
Default  Posted: 11:28 PM, January 25th (Friday)

I've read that they handle the sex addiction aspect of Jennifer Lawrence's character really well.


Me: BS, 34
Him: (SA/NPD)WH, 31
Multiple ddays since 2010 (Latest January 15th 2013) - not counting anymore!
FINAL FINAL DDay - August 8, 2014. I AM DONE!

Posts: 374 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: West Coast Canada
Charwheeze
Member
Member # 37689
Default  Posted: 11:54 PM, January 25th (Friday)

I saw it about a week ago. The infidelity part made me pretty uncomfortable, but what really sets me off is when two people are in love in a TV show or movie. That's when it hurts the most. The loneliness becomes overwhelming.


BH - me, 31
ex-WW - her, 31
Dday: 10-14-12
Divorced July 2013

Posts: 67 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: Florida
0115
Member
Member # 31740
Default  Posted: 11:55 PM, January 25th (Friday)

Well we ended up not seeing it tonight...went home and watched Sandlot with the kids instead.

fWH is having a hard time right now so I didn't think it would help.

I might have to rent it when it comes out though

Thanks for the heads up!
0115


BS (me) 49
FWH 49 newbeg2011
Married 29 years
Very Long LTA
DD 01/15/11-6/30/11
The hard work is done...let the healing begin.

Posts: 1004 | Registered: Apr 2011
MrsDoubtfire
Member
Member # 24786
Default  Posted: 4:23 AM, January 26th (Saturday)

It's a really good film and is very sensitively portrayed. I didn't trigger watching it.


BS(Me) FWH(Him) DDay 05.09
A went underground. True R 02.10
I won't let another woman reap the benefit of enjoying the man my H has now become†

Posts: 1571 | Registered: Jul 2009
Daisy312
Member
Member # 36813
Default  Posted: 10:05 AM, January 26th (Saturday)

It was tough for me! I didn't know what it was about and there were parts that just ripped at my heart! I'm 9 months past Dday, but still really struggling.

Posts: 260 | Registered: Sep 2012
Sad in AZ
Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 11:35 AM, January 26th (Saturday)

I saw it yesterday. If you trigger easily or are new to infidelity, it will hit you like a ton of bricks, mostly because of the attitude of the characters not affected by the infidelity. The mental health aspects of the movie are difficult; I didn't think I would like it when it was in progress, but by the end I was thrilled. I loved the movie.

[This message edited by Sad in AZ at 11:36 AM, January 26th (Saturday)]


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20031 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
mchercheur
Member
Member # 37735
Default  Posted: 9:57 PM, May 26th (Sunday)

Warning: Spoiler alert for anyone who didn't see it yet,
& trigger alert for new BSs

Just saw this movie tonight.
Just a few thoughts about it. Yes, it gives you a view into the world of BPD & sex addiction. But what hit me the most is how the BH was trying to "nice" the WW back---by losing weight, reading books,controlling his emotions, etc.
IOW, he blamed himself for her cheating on him, that she did it because of what he was lacking/his faults---& thought he could win her back if he could become better in those areas.
In the movie nobody seemed to acknowledge what a huge trauma her infidelity was.
Also, a good warning to any BS who seriously contemplates revenge on the OP.


together 25 yrs, married 24 yrs, 4 children;Rebuilding
D Day: 5/10/2011 PA
OW: WH's co-worker,divorced, no children, 20 yrs younger than I-----& she knew he was married, had met our kids, but that did not stop her from trying to destroy our family

Posts: 1361 | Registered: Dec 2012
scangel3
Member
Member # 36164
Default  Posted: 10:22 PM, May 26th (Sunday)

Really wanted to see this movie, didn't know it had infidelity in it. And considering I was triggering from hearing comedians joke about infidelity a few weeks ago, maybe this isn't a movie I should watch right now. Guess another movie to put on the for later list


BS-me 31, WH-31, M'd-10 years
DD 8.5, DS 6, DS 5.5
Dday 03/01/10 (our DD's bday)
A ended 08/31/10-09/02-10 (with multiple ddays in between).TT on 08/2012, 09/04/12, 11/16/2012, 01/2013, 6/25/2013 Says he wants R, but not proving it

Posts: 714 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Portland
rcantbleveit
Member
Member # 30476
Default  Posted: 10:36 PM, May 26th (Sunday)

I thought it was a great movie. It showed a realistic view of how some come apart after discovering infidelity & although they used BPD as his diagnosis, I've seen several people go through exactly the same emotions without that diagnosis.

I didn't see the woman in it as a sex addict. I saw her actions as another way of dealing with the loss of her husband. She felt tremendous guilt over his death. She felt alone & lonely so she used sex with others to deal with her negative emotions.

In the end, it was uplifting to see that regardless of what we go through & are dealing with, we somehow survive and can find love again.


Posts: 227 | Registered: Dec 2010
Topic Posts: 14