User Topic: Today I learned...
Member # 38010
Default  Posted: 11:26 PM, April 2nd (Tuesday)

that I have done a lot more healing than I realized...

I had some business things to deal with with STBX, face to face for the first time in 9 months. I used to tremble at the sight of his name in my inbox. I would literally throw up every time I heard his voice. Today when I saw him, nothing. No hives, no shaking hand or trembling legs, and only once or twice I threw up just a little in my mouth. Anytime he said something off subject, the redirect came easy, and the majority of the time, when he spoke, all I could think was, "I am co-parenting with a f***ing muppet!" I don't remember who was the one to say that, but THANK YOU!! The voices in my head were laughing constantly and it made it difficult to get caught up in unnecessary drama. I also ended up with a crazy case of the yawns!

Today was a day of victory in the healing process, thank you to all my SI friends, you have helped this girl more than you can ever imagine!!

Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.

Posts: 505 | Registered: Jan 2013
Member # 27148
Default  Posted: 11:27 PM, April 2nd (Tuesday)

I love to read about recovery in action! Good for you CharlieFoxtrot.

Don’t get to the end of your life and find that you lived only the length of it; live the width of it as well. 

Posts: 2700 | Registered: Jan 2010
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 11:34 PM, April 2nd (Tuesday)

ah, yes, the wise words of StrongButBroken.

They left a lasting impression on me too.

Good on you CF! progress.

Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5859 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 11:36 PM, April 2nd (Tuesday)

Just got on and saw this.... What a way to end my day. Thank you for this wonderful news... I love it when we can see the healing.

And the co parenting with a muppet....

Glad it went well. You did the hard work to get this far... Don't forget that. We can give all the advice in the world... you taking what you could use and working with it-got you to where you are today.



I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5249 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
Member # 37215
Default  Posted: 11:58 PM, April 2nd (Tuesday)

LOVE this post!! Thank you for sharing a BIG victory with us today!! I love reading posts like this!

Me (BS): 43 Children: DD 19, DS 15
Divorced September 30, 2014
"It's always darkest before the dawn ..."

Posts: 2264 | Registered: Oct 2012
Member # 37293
Default  Posted: 10:15 AM, April 3rd (Wednesday)

Yeaaah!! So glad to hear it.

"Taking the high road, and doing it with class."


Posts: 154 | Registered: Oct 2012
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 10:47 AM, April 3rd (Wednesday)

High five!!!

Feels good looking at them in the rear view mirror, doesn't it?

"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4683 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 10:56 AM, April 3rd (Wednesday)

Go on, you, with your healing and rockstar attitude.

You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams

Posts: 25667 | Registered: Aug 2011
Member # 38010
Default  Posted: 2:17 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday)

Feels good looking at them in the rear view mirror, doesn't it?

A thousand times YES!! I am still feeling empowered and amazed at how much life has changed in this past year. Experiences that could have easily destroyed me and yet, although crushed for a time, life goes on. While it isn't the life I had planned, I am realizing that in some ways it is just, well, better.

Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.

Posts: 505 | Registered: Jan 2013
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 3:17 AM, April 4th (Thursday)

Love this and not just because I'm an egomaniac.

It still puts a a smile on my face.

My full quote was "I am co-parenting with a fucking muppet. And not even one of the important ones, a lower muppet".

I had to see monster for our first court session today and I had to stop myself giggling after I thought: "Yep - still a lower muppet for sure".

Laughter really is the best medicine.

[This message edited by StrongButBroken at 4:24 AM, April 4th (Thursday)]

I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5608 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Member # 38378
Default  Posted: 4:28 PM, April 29th (Monday)

This is where I strive to be.

Prior to false R I was really getting there, but false R brought DDay, which brought me back down to hell.

I've wondered at loose timetables for when I can be more detatched and I like how CF was able to describe the reactions that I have as well.

I also had/have panic attacks, because I don't know if I see STBXH, will he ignore me or make a fight if he doesn't ignore me?

The term "co parenting" is an interesting one, because STBXH is pretty half-assed and doesn't do what he said he would.

NL (Neighbor Lady) is three years past divorce and says, "It's like I have three sons! DS9 is the most responsible of all!

Ashland 13

A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess

Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.

-George Washington

Posts: 2287 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: New England
Member # 29250
Default  Posted: 8:35 PM, April 29th (Monday)


“People who cheat feel that life is for the taking, and that everyone deserves happiness no matter what the cost. I must remember these tricks if I ever have my soul surgically removed."
Me: BS 42. Him: WH 41 2 Kids 6&9
Married 14 yrs Together 21

Posts: 1575 | Registered: Aug 2010
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 8:42 PM, April 29th (Monday)

"It's like I have three sons! DS9 is the most responsible of all!

I can relate to this^^^^

Every encounter with him is like talking to a 4 year old and I'm not joking.

It has helped that I realize now that he knows he cannot get me riled up, so he really tries to when it comes to our children, visitation, etc. So, I don't give him the satisfaction of an argument.

me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed

Posts: 2195 | Registered: Jan 2012
Topic Posts: 13