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Wayward Side
User Topic: what are you grateful for?
cinnamongurl
Member
Member # 37879
Default  Posted: 10:08 PM, April 17th (Wednesday)

I wonder if it's even possible at times. Self forgiveness seems such an unattainable feat. Every time I think I've made some progress, something in me triggers and I realize just how far I am from there.

In another post I made about guilt, a fellow wayward brought up the concept of gratitude. Not just to your BS, but applying it to all aspects of your life, including yourself. This has been replaying in my head since then.

I would like to share a list of what I'm grateful for today.
1) the sun and all of its light and warmth. In a recent blood test I learned I had a Vitamin D deficiency. This can cause fatigue, muscle and joint pain, restless sleep, headaches. The suggested treatment my Dr prescribed? Sunlight. To get outside, and soak in the rays and today? That's just what i did. Simple yet so important.
2) BSO felt safe enough to share his feelings with me today. I am humbled by the choice he made to allow me into his world, if only for a short while.
3) that I felt worthy enough to share my feelings with him today. It's a huge step for me to feel like I deserve any love from him at all. His welcoming embrace allowed me to see my worth through his eyes.

What in your life, and within yourself, are you grateful for?


Me: 36 fWGF He: 35 BBF and my heart
Together 18 yrs. "You were sick, but now you're well again, and there's work to do."
Kurt Vonnegut



Posts: 506 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: home with my heart.
Steppenwolf
Member
Member # 38140
Default  Posted: 11:12 PM, April 17th (Wednesday)

Wonderful topic.

I am grateful that I woke up next to RockyMtn this morning.
I am grateful for her strength and inspiration.
I am grateful that I have a chance of becoming her best friend again.
I am grateful that my future with or without her will be authentic and free of lies. That I have an opportunity to become a better human being.
I am grateful for SI. I am continually amazed by the insight this place has smacked me over the head with.
i am grateful that I made it through the day without drinking or taking drugs.


Me: WS- 30s
Her: BS- 30s RockyMtn



Posts: 126 | Registered: Jan 2013
cinnamongurl
Member
Member # 37879
Default  Posted: 11:52 PM, April 17th (Wednesday)

Thank you for sharing, steppenwolf! What a beautiful list!


Me: 36 fWGF He: 35 BBF and my heart
Together 18 yrs. "You were sick, but now you're well again, and there's work to do."
Kurt Vonnegut



Posts: 506 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: home with my heart.
BIZZYBEEZ
Member
Member # 37645
Default  Posted: 11:57 PM, April 17th (Wednesday)

My WS suggested every night before bed we each say 3 things that we are grateful for or went well for us that day. As a BS I struggle finding the good in the day - since we started this exercise I'm finding myself a little more at peace & happier.


BW (me) - 47
WH (him) - 39
DDay - 10/22/2012 (worst day of my life)

Learning to breathe again - one day at a time


Posts: 235 | Registered: Nov 2012
knightsbff
Member
Member # 36853
Default  Posted: 3:07 PM, April 18th (Thursday)

I'm grateful for today spent with my BH and a nice lunch out.

I'm grateful for our much improved communication. He actually turns to me when he's hurting or angry. I'm truly grateful that he gives me the opportunity to step up.

I'm grateful for SI. This mess would be sooo much harder without it.


FWW 40's
D-day August 27, 2012
3 kids and 2 dogs

Posts: 1411 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Deep South, USA
heartbroken0903
Member
Member # 27879
Content  Posted: 7:03 PM, April 18th (Thursday)

In no particular order...

1.) My currently stable health and the health of my family and friends. Such a blessing!

2.) My XH. I love that man. I am ever grateful for another chance to be his partner in life.

3.) The forgiveness of my friends & family. They have shown me much grace.

4.) My 3 sweet cats. They bring sunshine into my life every day. They don't know all the wrong that I've done, nor the good that I've done...they just know I'm "mommy" and that I'm crazy about them. I highly recommend pets!

5.) The GORGEOUS weather this time of year...oh, I love it. Every day should be like this!

6.) God and His love. Jeremiah 29:11.

7.) A job (said through gritted teeth) that provides food for my table and a roof over my head. I don't like the work that I do, but I'm grateful to be able to do it.


Me: WS, 30s
XH: BS, 40s
No kids

Married 2.5 years
D-day 3/6/10
Divorced 5/14/10

Reconciled after divorce

"Someday you'll look back on all these days
And all this pain is gonna be invisible." - Hunter Hayes, "Invisible"


Posts: 2100 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: the cat's meow
hurtmywife27
Member
Member # 38799
Default  Posted: 8:18 PM, April 18th (Thursday)

I am grateful I am sitting next to my beautiful wife.


WH (me) 59
BS (her) 45
D day 3/7/2013
Married 26 together 28
2 adult sons 25 and 22................................. I Totally screwed up.

Posts: 66 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Toms River NJ
cinnamongurl
Member
Member # 37879
Default  Posted: 9:31 PM, April 18th (Thursday)

Thank you everyone for sharing your lists! Its so comforting to be able to find so much light in such a dark time in all of our lives. I think I'm going to start a daily gratitude journal. I think the positivity and commitment are incredibly helpful in developing new, healthy thoughts and habits.


Me: 36 fWGF He: 35 BBF and my heart
Together 18 yrs. "You were sick, but now you're well again, and there's work to do."
Kurt Vonnegut



Posts: 506 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: home with my heart.
Bumbling
New Member
Member # 38920
Default  Posted: 6:06 PM, April 19th (Friday)

I'm grateful for my wife who works so hard on "us."

For how much better our relationship has gotten; how much better we communicate; how much better we understand each others needs; how much more fun we have together.

For the potential joy I can now see in our future together.

For brain meds.



Posts: 33 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Texas
Theradin
Member
Member # 38518
Default  Posted: 2:17 PM, April 20th (Saturday)

I am grateful for my family being healthy and resilient.

I am grateful for my WS doing everything she can to change herself for the better and truly commit to me and to our family in every way imaginable.

I am grateful for my job (note: I actually do NOT care that much for my job, but I'm grateful for the $$$ it brings in to allow my family to worry less and enjoy things in life).

I am grateful for In-N-Out Burger. I don't know why I am. I guess I just love their cheeseburgers (DOUBLE!), and don't get to have them that often.

I am grateful for SI.com. Does this one really need explaining?

That's about it today! :)


ME: 33 BH
HER: 32 WW
Married: 8 years
Children: Yes
DDay #1: 02/22/2006 (ONS)
DDay #2: 09/23/2012 (EA/PA)
DDay #3: 12/07/2012 (EA/PA)
DDay #4: 01/03/2013 (EA/PA)
DDay #5: 01/24/2013 (EA/PA)
TT until 04/07/2013
100% NC: 04/18/2013

Posts: 190 | Registered: Feb 2013
knightsbff
Member
Member # 36853
Default  Posted: 4:20 PM, April 21st (Sunday)

I'm grateful I was able to go to church today with my BH and kids.

I'm grateful for a supportive and loving BH who notices the changes I have made and am still making, and who loves me and our family enough to tell me when he feels something isn't right.

I'm grateful for my sweet sweet children who all (3) have loving, caring, tender hearts. My DS 9 still pick flowers (weeds) for me. my DD 21 calls and texts frequently from school. DD 14 bakes us cookies. I'm very blessed and I almost threw it all away.

I'm grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who forgives us and will even help us to fix our messes if we will ask and put in our ALL. I'm working on it.


FWW 40's
D-day August 27, 2012
3 kids and 2 dogs

Posts: 1411 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Deep South, USA
KBeguile
Member
Member # 38348
Default  Posted: 4:30 PM, April 21st (Sunday)

I'm grateful our DS is at my parents' house, having the time of his little life.

I'm grateful that I have the strength and the fortitude to take care of Heart during the rough times.

I'm EXCEPTIONALLY grateful for the good times, when they come. Being able to see Heart smile, have her care about my well-being, and almost see that bounce in her step really makes me glad that I made the decisions I did after D-Day.


Me: fWS 32
Her: BS 35 (HeartInADustpan)
DS: 4yo
M: 7 years
DDays: 2012/11/14, 2013/02/05, 2013/03/09
-
"Everything that happens now is happening 'now.'"
"What happened to 'then'?"
"We passed 'then.'"

Posts: 795 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: St. Louis
4everRemorseful
New Member
Member # 37972
Default  Posted: 11:00 PM, April 25th (Thursday)

I am grateful for the rambunctious wrestle/tickle fights BH and I spontaneously have from time to time. I never win, but I love it. I smile thinking about it.

I am grateful for my dog. He's my silent but soulful friend. His small quirks and the way he gets my attention sometimes just cracks me up. I am so grateful for him, he's always by my side.

I am very grateful for second chances. I get it wrong sometimes and the work can be torturous at times, but I am SO thankful BH gave me the chance at R. I am looking forward to meeting myself one day soon, and introducing her to the man of my dreams; my husband.

I am grateful for laughter. Especially that of my children. Hearing them laugh...those deep, belly laughs and the silly giggles...everything shitty disappears for a few seconds. Those breaks are beautiful.


Me: fWS 30 Him: BH 44
Married: 5.5 yrs
Together: 7 yrs
Children: 16yo Step-daughter, 12yo Step-son, 8yo daughter.
D-Day#1: 12/29/2012
D-day#2: 1/9/2013
PA w/OM#1 from 10/12 to 12/12
PA w/OM#2 from 11/12 to 12/12
In R

Posts: 23 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: 4everremorseful
Unagie
Member
Member # 37091
Default  Posted: 12:31 AM, April 26th (Friday)

I am grateful I woke up to sunshine.

I am grateful that SO and I shared a moment today that was genuinely happy and free of the damage we have caused each other.

I am grateful for my furbaby and the possibility of getting her a little brother or sister furbaby.

I am grateful that I made my mom smile today.

I am grateful that I had tango and bachata classes this week that took me away from it all.

I am grateful that I still have a chance to do it right.


Heartbroken madhatter trying to rebuild

No longer together

Do not let others be your reference for who you see in the mirror.

Stop allowing people to hurt you, because you don't love you enough to walk away.


Posts: 2701 | Registered: Oct 2012
cinnamongurl
Member
Member # 37879
Default  Posted: 5:51 AM, April 26th (Friday)

Thank you for sharing your heartfelt lists everyone! This thread warms my heart every time I read through it. It inspires more gratitude as well.


Me: 36 fWGF He: 35 BBF and my heart
Together 18 yrs. "You were sick, but now you're well again, and there's work to do."
Kurt Vonnegut



Posts: 506 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: home with my heart.
Jack317
New Member
Member # 39010
Default  Posted: 9:23 AM, April 27th (Saturday)

I'm grateful for my BS at least not leaving me. I have a wonderful wife who I love. I'm also grateful for the fact that she's allowing me to remain in her life. And I'm also grateful for being able to run a mile and half without stopping.

Posts: 23 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Jack317
authenticnow
Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 1:17 PM, April 27th (Saturday)

I am grateful for my H, DS and DD.

There are days (like today) when I'm on the phone with one, and the other beeps in, and then the other beeps in. Their timing is a little eerie.

But, I am grateful that my biggest problem most days is juggling conversations with the three people who I love the most in the world.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37356 | Registered: Sep 2007
Neithan
Member
Member # 35924
Default  Posted: 1:24 PM, April 27th (Saturday)

I'm also grateful for being able to run a mile and half without stopping.

Who was chasing you?


Me: BH
Her: WW
D-Day: 2/19/2010
Married 1981
That which does not kill me makes me more irritable

Posts: 320 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Among the Gaurwaith
Topic Posts: 18