SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
New Beginnings
User Topic: Need help NB peeps! Maybe more a question for the guys....
She11ybeanz
Member
Member # 27457
DOH!  Posted: 1:32 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

Okay....so I have a 1st date tomorrow night...and its a dinner date! I haven't been on a date in FOREVER!!! He just sent me a message and is picking me up around 6ish and wants to take me to a new Lebanese restaurant downtown.... it sounds fairly nice! (not overly fancy.....cause they do sell fries there!)

So...stupid question I guess! I have NO CLUE what to wear??!!! A sundress....or maybe just jeans and a nice top?? I don't want to overdress or underdress....EEK! Do guys care? Are there turnoffs as far as what a date wears for that token "1st impression"..... I need help!

I'm so nervous!!!!

This is SO new territory for me!!! #Rusty

[This message edited by She11ybeanz at 1:32 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)]


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 1:35 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

Where something that will help you feel comfortable and confident. Don't do something that isn't YOU.

For me, that would likely be jeans, a cute top, and sandals with a heel. Everyone's different, however. So do "you."


You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams


Posts: 25020 | Registered: Aug 2011
Amazonia
Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 1:36 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

Wear something that you are comfortable in, but that also makes you feel confident. You know the kind of clothes I mean - something that when you put it on, you kind of strut a little because you know you look good! But no itchies or too tight so you're fidgeting or worrying about fidgeting during the date.

ps - yummmmmmmmy lebanese. Please promise me you won't order fries.

[This message edited by Amazonia at 1:37 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)]


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13687 | Registered: Jul 2011
She11ybeanz
Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 1:38 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

Hmmm....I'm thinking that too! The jeans and cute top idea sounds like me too! I think you are on to something there! Plus, I have the best perfume on the planet....and always get conpliments on it. I know how to smell AWESOME for a date! hehehe! And, just make sure my hair looks good! That's probably my best feature! Long auburn hair! They say to accentuate your best features!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
She11ybeanz
Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 1:39 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

LOL!!! What's wrong with fries??? Besides that they will remain glued to my butt long after the date ends....


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
turned123
Member
Member # 33663
Default  Posted: 1:40 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

I think if you take the time to show you care about your appearance the rest doesnt matter. I agree go for comfort. Be yourself and have fun!!! You have already impressed him enough to press for a date so there is no preasure


me BS 48
her WW 45
married 15 years
divorced
3 wonderful but hurt kids

Posts: 334 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: milwaukee
fireproof
Member
Member # 36126
Default  Posted: 1:54 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

Jeans sound cute!

Have fun!

I would suggest if it is a first date either meet him there or have him pick you up from a shopping area near your home.

Even with the safest guy you don't want him knowing where you live on the first few dates.


Posts: 931 | Registered: Jul 2012
Spirit13
Member
Member # 31758
Default  Posted: 2:11 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

Dress a smidgen down. I found when I was dating that at first I had a tendency to be ever so slightly over-dressed at first dates. I would be just a little more "dressy casual" than the guy I was meeting and I don't think it served me well. I consulted with a friend and we picked out some outfits that were more casual, but still nice. I did much better with this. It was funny because my SO told me the "t shirt that fit just right across your chest" was a big seller on the first date. LOL. guys like t-shirts! who knew?

At any rate, looking too dressed up makes you look too eager. Got to play it cool....


Men were deceivers ever; one foot in sea and one on shore, to one thing constant never.

Posts: 620 | Registered: Apr 2011 | From: Midwest
Amazonia
Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 2:12 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

There's nothing wrong with fries, there's just nothing lebanese about them!


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13687 | Registered: Jul 2011
She11ybeanz
Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 2:17 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

Okay....so paranoia or red flag? My best friend looked up this new restaurant and said it shows on their webpage that they do not open until May 6th! When I told him this via a message, he said he knows the guy (that owns it I guess) and that he thought they had opened, but would ask him.....

Hmmm....now my best friend has me worried I have a date with a serial killer....

Hopefully, he just wants to impress me??


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
Kajem
Member
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 2:37 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

shelly,

When I worked in the restaurant business we had 'soft' openings.. we opened our doors to the public for about a month to work out bugs, deliveries, staff etc...

when a restaurant opens the foodies show up and review.. you want all the stuff that can go wrong over with before the grand opening and the foodies show up.

Then held the grand opening with publicity etc...a month later.

This may be the case with this restaurant.


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5014 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
She11ybeanz
Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 2:42 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

Thank you Kajem....

That makes me feel more at ease!!!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
She11ybeanz
Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 3:36 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

Okay....red flag gone...

He just sent me a message saying I was right...that it hadn't opened yet and he knew of a nice little cozy Thai restaurant nearby me we can go instead!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
JessicaFL127
Member
Member # 26864
Default  Posted: 4:47 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

I have a good feeling about this guy, Shelly. And I second the jeans and sandals with a cute top, probably a light to medium blue based on your hair and skin tone. And slight tj- which perfume? I am nearly out and I buy my own mother's day gifts....


BW,32
divorced for 6 years
mom to two awesome boys,10 and 9

"But you said your vows, and you closed the door
On so many men who would have loved you more" -Cath, DCFC

"The most amazing things can come from some terrible lies"


Posts: 1244 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Missouri
permanentpain
Member
Member # 38312
Default  Posted: 4:53 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)


Me: 32 y/o, student and mom of two of the best kids in the world
Him: 33 y/o scumbag
Divorcing
Feels good to start laughing and feeling better again...

Posts: 270 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Island
permanentpain
Member
Member # 38312
Default  Posted: 4:54 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

Something like that, but skinny jeans... I think its cute and you can dress it up or down. Good luck on the date, and please the name of your perfume

[This message edited by permanentpain at 4:55 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)]


Me: 32 y/o, student and mom of two of the best kids in the world
Him: 33 y/o scumbag
Divorcing
Feels good to start laughing and feeling better again...

Posts: 270 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Island
5454real
Member
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 5:01 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

It's been a while, but, the most important thing a woman can wear is CONFIDENCE!

Good luck


BH 51, WW 42
DS 23(Mine),SD 21,SS 20(Hers),DS 9 Ours, DGS 3, DGD 1 mo
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 10yrs
I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 2722 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
Survivor3512
Member
Member # 37946
Default  Posted: 6:32 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

Comfortable and confident! Whatever that is for you! And have fun!! I'm so excited for you. :)


Me (BS)- 36
Divorced
----------------------------------------------------------
Just keep swimming, just keep swimming- Dorie

Posts: 293 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: Southeastern U.S.
She11ybeanz
Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 6:46 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

My TWO favorite perfumes that you can never go wrong with are:

DKNY's Pure!

And

Ralph Lauren's "Always yours Romance"

Everytime I wear one of these I get compliments! My best friend's husband told me the last time I was over to their house that I smelled "freakin fantastic"

I've even had straight men tell me I smelled fabulous!

[This message edited by She11ybeanz at 6:47 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)]


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
JessicaFL127
Member
Member # 26864
Default  Posted: 8:10 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

I've had the second but not the first. Sounds like a plan, thanks! And have a great time!


BW,32
divorced for 6 years
mom to two awesome boys,10 and 9

"But you said your vows, and you closed the door
On so many men who would have loved you more" -Cath, DCFC

"The most amazing things can come from some terrible lies"


Posts: 1244 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Missouri
She11ybeanz
Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 9:28 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

Make sure to get the lotion or body butter and layer! For some reason that seems to be the trick!

EEEEEE....I'm SO excited about tomorrow! And, yet nervous too! Its been SUCH a long time since I've been on a date!!! OMG!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
JessicaFL127
Member
Member # 26864
Default  Posted: 9:39 PM, April 24th (Wednesday)

I will, thanks! And have a great time, I think this will be good if you let it!


BW,32
divorced for 6 years
mom to two awesome boys,10 and 9

"But you said your vows, and you closed the door
On so many men who would have loved you more" -Cath, DCFC

"The most amazing things can come from some terrible lies"


Posts: 1244 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Missouri
TrulyReconciled
Member
Member # 3031
Default  Posted: 12:41 PM, April 25th (Thursday)

He probably wanted to go 'Lebanese' thinking it would be all girls ...


"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."

Posts: 21040 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Hell and back, way back :o)
ButterflyGirl
Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 1:04 PM, April 25th (Thursday)

Good luck on your date tonight!!


xBW~ 35
Two of the most darling sons ~ 10 and 7

Posts: 2104 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
She11ybeanz
Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 2:26 PM, April 25th (Thursday)

Thank you! This day is draggggggggggggging!!!!

I'm so nervous! But, excited too!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
JessicaFL127
Member
Member # 26864
Default  Posted: 3:49 PM, April 25th (Thursday)

Good luck, Shelly!


BW,32
divorced for 6 years
mom to two awesome boys,10 and 9

"But you said your vows, and you closed the door
On so many men who would have loved you more" -Cath, DCFC

"The most amazing things can come from some terrible lies"


Posts: 1244 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Missouri
permanentpain
Member
Member # 38312
Default  Posted: 7:57 PM, April 25th (Thursday)

Have fun!


Me: 32 y/o, student and mom of two of the best kids in the world
Him: 33 y/o scumbag
Divorcing
Feels good to start laughing and feeling better again...

Posts: 270 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Island
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 8:22 PM, April 25th (Thursday)

I'm no expert on time zones, but it appears to be past your curfew, young lady. I'm giving you a little leeway so you can get your little sweetie to bed, but you'd best be reporting in soon.


You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams


Posts: 25020 | Registered: Aug 2011
Survivor3512
Member
Member # 37946
Default  Posted: 9:18 PM, April 25th (Thursday)

I hope you had a great time tonight!!


Me (BS)- 36
Divorced
----------------------------------------------------------
Just keep swimming, just keep swimming- Dorie

Posts: 293 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: Southeastern U.S.
Kajem
Member
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 1:50 AM, April 26th (Friday)

OH Shelly,

Those of us NOT dating like to live vicariously thru those that are dating. Your supposed to give us an update>>>

or maybe Shelly has had so much fun, the date hasn't ended yet!


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5014 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
jo2love
Moderator
Member # 31528
Red  Posted: 1:45 PM, April 26th (Friday)

Please use the link below for an update.

http://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=494389


Posts: 34685 | Registered: Mar 2011
Topic Posts: 31