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User Topic: Why does a BS cause themselves more pain
hurtmywife27
Member
Member # 38799
Default  Posted: 5:48 AM, April 26th (Friday)

I don't understand why a BS would cause the self so much pain? The emotional hurt, distrust, the triggers can all be understood, feeling the remorse, listening to songs that are tearing her apart, ( gets to me to) did you ever notice they play just at the right moment! But she has my passwords all my cell phone records and still waiting for my blood test from doctor the lab screwed up and didnt. Get them their... I asked the doctor to talk to my wife and she understood. But she was in my e mail and text me.. What other sites have you been to looking for woman? What? I haven't been to any except Craigslist. She says in your mail you have date search, senior search, FB search for dating, Russian girls wanting husband, I replied are you in my Spam Mail . She was, tried to explain that I get hit with that everyday if you notice there is over 400 spams, I don't open them or read them. I delete them when I remember to do it, I wish there was an way to get rid of them but that's like saying get rid of telemarketers.. That would be a great world. I know it's going to be a long road for her and am comforting her In ever way, loving her and care for her. How do I explain spam mail?


WH (me) 59
BS (her) 45
D day 3/7/2013
Married 26 together 28
2 adult sons 25 and 22................................. I Totally screwed up.

Posts: 66 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Toms River NJ
hurtmywife27
Member
Member # 38799
Default  Posted: 5:49 AM, April 26th (Friday)

Hey how do I get rid of the stop sign? I don't want this closed.


WH (me) 59
BS (her) 45
D day 3/7/2013
Married 26 together 28
2 adult sons 25 and 22................................. I Totally screwed up.

Posts: 66 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Toms River NJ
metamorphisis
Administrator
Member # 12041
Default  Posted: 6:22 AM, April 26th (Friday)

Before you hit submit you have to uncheck the Stop Sign under the text box to remove the Stop.
I'll remove it for you now.



“We don't see things as they are; we see them as we are.”... Anais Nin

Posts: 44484 | Registered: Sep 2006
RockyMtn
Member
Member # 37043
Default  Posted: 6:31 AM, April 26th (Friday)

I don't know how to explain spam mail. But you may want to consider getting a new email address. I use gmail and so does just about everyone I know and the spam is way less of an issue with yahoo, hotmail, etc. I know I'm not answering your question...but if you don't address the source of the spam, this is just gonna keep coming up, even if you can explain to her that the stuff is spam. She's not always going to believe it.


Me, BS, 30s
Him, WS, 30s, Steppenwolf
Kids: Yep
D-Day 1: September 2011, 6 week EA
D-Day 2: January 2013, discovered EA was a PA; there was another PA in 2010. All TT.
Goal = serenity.

Posts: 667 | Registered: Oct 2012
sodamnlost
Member
Member # 37190
Default  Posted: 6:40 AM, April 26th (Friday)

BS here, hoping I don't swing the 2x4 too hard here.

I don't understand why a BS would cause the self so much pain? The emotional hurt, distrust, the triggers can all be understood, feeling the remorse, listening to songs that are tearing her apart, ( gets to me to) did you ever notice they play just at the right moment

Your BS is NOT causing herself pain, YOU caused this. She is processing her pain, big difference. My WH didn't (doesn't?) get that one either. We don't listen to painful songs because we want to wallow in grief, we listen to painful songs because someone else understands our pain that way. We check things restlessly (like your email) because we have been LIED to and deceived and the spouse we thought we had didn't exist. We look for signs it is still happening because we ignored them before Dday. We go over and over details and ask for more graphic details so we can make it all real. Believe me when I say this isn't done on purpose, it is how we make sense of and process this trauma that our best friend and lover inflicted on us.

Maybe try supporting her and actually seeing her pain and step back and you will see her, REALLY see her. You will see she HAS to do these things to accept the plate you have handed her.

It's great you are asking and I get why this is confusing for a WS, until this has been done to you, it doesn't make sense. Ask her why she does these things and be ready for some painful truths as you see the full Monty of pain and betrayal she is facing.


If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck - it's not a fluffy pink unicorn squirting liquid rainbows, complete with pots of gold out of it's ass.

Posts: 766 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: Nowhere pretty
atsenaotie
Member
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 7:08 AM, April 26th (Friday)

I don't understand why a BS would cause the self so much pain?

Nearly everything we thought we knew and believed about our spouse and relationship has been brought into question. Our own self confidence and self image has been pulled out from under us. The person we trusted for support and comfort has knifed us, refuses to help as we are asking, and then complains that we are doing wrong when we try to save ourselves.

You should really ask this in General if you want answers.

ETA: It is not spam mail you need to explain. You need to explain, and prove through sustained actions, why it is safe to remain M to you and that you will not turn to an OW again in the future, and that you understand and are remorseful for your betrayal.

[This message edited by atsenaotie at 7:12 AM, April 26th (Friday)]


FBS 54
Separated and Divorcing

Posts: 4118 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
idiot85
Member
Member # 38934
Default  Posted: 7:10 AM, April 26th (Friday)

Your BS is NOT causing herself pain, YOU caused this. She is processing her pain, big difference

This ^^^

We don't listen to painful songs because we want to wallow in grief, we listen to painful songs because someone else understands our pain that way

...And this ^^^

-Mate, it's pretty specialist to want to "cause" yourself pain. I doubt your Mrs wants to- in fact I'm almost certain she'll be trying to alleviate her pain as best she can.

Contact you Internet Service Provider (ISP) and see if the spam filter can be improved. Sometimes they'll offer a program to download- careful it doesn't white list though or everything not in your address book will automatically be seen as spam.


BH-29 (me)
WW-28

Multi famam, conscientiam, pauci verentur.


Posts: 575 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Old Blighty
Kelany
Member
Member # 34755
Default  Posted: 7:48 AM, April 26th (Friday)

Change your e-mail address and close your other one down. Have your BS there with you when you do this so she KNOWS you're shutting the old one down completely. This would go a long way in letting her see that former AP's can't contact you via mail anymore.

Like others said, WE do not choose to cause ourselves pain. You did that when you chose to cheat and inflict this pain on us. Trust us, we do NOT enjoy the pain at all. It's like being stabbed int he heart over and over and over, and all we want to do is escape the pain.


BS - Me
SA/FWH Him
DDay 1 - Jul 11
DDay 2 - Jul 12
R Dec 12

Former 80s Icon wishful thinking


Posts: 2031 | Registered: Feb 2012
Aubrie
Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 8:19 AM, April 26th (Friday)

I don't understand why a BS would cause the self so much pain?
How do you think her pain started? Look in the mirror. You're the one holding the knife.

Have you listened to the radio lately? Do you know how hard it is to find a song that's not dripping with infidelity, whether from the perpetrator or the victim's angle?

As far as the email...
Can you understand why your wife would be flipping out? She can't trust you. She can't believe anything you say. So she is in research mode, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Waiting to see if you are lying, carrying the A underground, or TTing her.

She will question every single piece of mail you get. Whether it is legit or not. Because that single email could be the one that gives her another Dday. That is what she fears. So she asks you, hoping you prove her fears wrong.

You can significantly reduce spam by A. Changing your filter settings, or B. Get a new email address completely.

You are in the very, very early stages. Your words are going to mean nothing for a while. You will have to prove with your actions every minute of every day that you are truly done with the A/As. That you are changing. Consisted actions over the course of time. She will eventually take the spam for what it is. Spam. But for now, she's going to think it's her worst nightmare become reality. Again.


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6174 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
SoVerySadNow
Member
Member # 36711
Default  Posted: 10:41 AM, April 26th (Friday)

she is in research mode, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Waiting to see if you are lying, carrying the A underground, or TTing her.

Yes^^^^
It's what we BS do. We have to get a baseline in reality since we have none.
I also agree that you need to shut down your email and get a new one. Maybe a joint one for the two of you to use. Those spam ads will come forever and new ones will start up because of your registration with CL and various searches grabbing your info. It's just not worth her torture to keep that email.
Ed -typs- darn iPad.

[This message edited by SoVerySadNow at 10:42 AM, April 26th (Friday)]


Me:BW
Him:WH
D-day(s),after years of TT and Gaslighting was Labor Day Weekend 2012, continuing for a week after. *Dammit! More TT 3/9/13
Really trending toward D- planning about it is my "happy place" now.

Posts: 1292 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Sunny Florida
mchercheur
Member
Member # 37735
Default  Posted: 10:58 AM, April 26th (Friday)

We BSs keep checking/questioning because we don't feel safe anymore. It is up to you to make your BW feel safe again.


together 25 yrs, married 24 yrs, 4 children;Rebuilding
D Day: 5/10/2011 PA
OW: WH's co-worker,divorced, no children, 20 yrs younger than I-----& she knew he was married, had met our kids, but that did not stop her from trying to destroy our family

Posts: 1364 | Registered: Dec 2012
longroadhome
Member
Member # 32428
Default  Posted: 11:46 AM, April 26th (Friday)

It's called hyper vigilance. It's a very normal reaction to the trauma that you caused with your A. It will level off gradually IF you put 100% effort into fixing your issues, but it will take a long time. At two-plus years out, Mrs LRH us just getting to the pint where it's starting to settle down some.

She is not doing this to herself. You did it to her. Don't forget that. Your BS did not choose to exist in this state. You made the choice to put her here without her permission.

Posts like this, if your BS reads your posts here, can slow healing and make her feel like you don't get it. I hope that's not the case, so I'm telling you to be careful of that.


Me: WH
Her: BW, and the most amazing, beautiful person I've ever known

It is counterintuitive really... the less we defend our well-being, the more well we feel. ~ Nancy Colier


Posts: 547 | Registered: Jun 2011
JanaGreen
Member
Member # 29341
Default  Posted: 12:02 PM, April 26th (Friday)

It's called hyper vigilance. It's a very normal reaction to the trauma that you caused with your A. It will level off gradually IF you put 100% effort into fixing your issues, but it will take a long time.

This exactly.

She's trying to make sure she has the whole truth so she can understand the situation. Being completely blindsided will do that to a person. You no longer know which way is up. The thing you thought would never be true has now become true, so that means that anything else might be true, too.


We're both in our 30s. One awesome 4-year-old daughter.

Posts: 6672 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Somewhere in the South
needhelp123
Member
Member # 38109
Default  Posted: 12:12 PM, April 26th (Friday)

WS here. Atsenaotie describes this well as I am living through it. My BS continually questions who I am and asks questions about my affair that have been answered. Get comfortable with that. It hurts but it's not about you. When you hear that IC is about you and that you should work on yourself, follow that advice because it's true. You should ask your BS how you can help but sometimes there is nothing you can do at a particular time. It's not about checking off boxes on things you've done and then you wonder why she's still confused and depressed. It goes much deeper than that. What would you do if the tables were turned? Probably nothing much different. Look at her and see the destruction. Then decide what you should be doing from your heart not your head. Huge difference.


Me: 47 BS: Cheerless (not giving her age)
DDay 12/31/12
30 days of TT WRONG - try 17 months
2 great teenagers
I had a LTA - EA and then PA. Escalated in 2012.
Never Giving Up Hope
The secret of life is to "die before you die" - Eckhart Tolle

Posts: 92 | Registered: Jan 2013
hurtmywife27
Member
Member # 38799
Default  Posted: 6:23 PM, April 26th (Friday)

I do realize the pain was caused by me. And it was me that made that fatal mistake, not only not thinking of her but her safety either. She is in pain and sometimes I dont know if I am hurting her more. She has all my passwords, user names and I am installing ago GPS locater in my car that can be downloaded to any computer or I pad (this was my choice) I will keep all my sales receipts for customers. Trying to make it easier for her not to worry were I am at all times. I changed her life and regret what happened, if she needs comfort, I'm here if she needs to go, or leave me permenantly it's here choice.. Thank you for the advise about changing e mail.


WH (me) 59
BS (her) 45
D day 3/7/2013
Married 26 together 28
2 adult sons 25 and 22................................. I Totally screwed up.

Posts: 66 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Toms River NJ
Jeyana
Member
Member # 38464
Default  Posted: 6:35 PM, April 26th (Friday)

No stop sign so..Bgf here. You mentioned that you are there if she needs you. My Wexfiance says stuff like that and it hurts me. He is passive. If I need something then I need to ask or speak up. God that hurts. It was only when he faced rejection by reaching out to me, again and again. By putting himself in the line of fire over and over, that I started to feel like it might mean something. And yes I did sometimes reject him, and sometimes I came unglued. But he did try again. That "here if you want me/need me" situation sucks for a BS. I wanted to know my Wexfiance was willing to do anything to make it right no matter how painfull, embarrassing, uncomfortable or scared he was. Right now it's hit and miss for us though.

Posts: 121 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: oregon
hurtmywife27
Member
Member # 38799
Default  Posted: 7:42 PM, April 26th (Friday)

Thanks Jeyana


WH (me) 59
BS (her) 45
D day 3/7/2013
Married 26 together 28
2 adult sons 25 and 22................................. I Totally screwed up.

Posts: 66 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Toms River NJ
mysticpenguin
Member
Member # 38839
Default  Posted: 8:13 PM, April 26th (Friday)

I think you've been sufficiently 2x4'd in regards to your topic sentence here so I'll address the spam issue.

I do a lot of online selling and buying (usually buying from Craigslist and flipping on eBay), and I get those same e-mails. And I'm a woman, and I've never cheated on my husband or responded to a personals ad or anything. Basically half the listings on Craigslist are fishing for e-mail addresses that the poster can then pump spam into. There are companies (i.e. -- the sketchy dating sites that are emailing you) who literally pay people $1 for each new e-mail address they sell them to send spam to. ANYWAY... the only solution to this particular problem is to get an entirely new e-mail address and never use it to sign up for any website or respond to any ad anywhere on the internet -- not to buy something, not to adopt a pet, not to join a website, not even to apply for a job.


Betrayed

Posts: 306 | Registered: Mar 2013
wolf_heart
Member
Member # 35262
Default  Posted: 8:16 PM, April 26th (Friday)

BS here.

One of the things my WH did to help me was change his phone number and e-mail address. Took him a year, but he finally did it and wished he had sooner for me.

You do not know what a relief it is to me that she does not have that way to contact him. She could have broken nc and honestly I was constantly checking his phone and e-mail to see if she had. Like several times a day. I was obsessed. Now, I can relax a little and only check them once a week or so.

We use gmail and the spam is not as bad.

The deal is you screwed up big time. You destroyed the trust she had in you. You destroyed her security in your relationship and she is coping the best she can. Cut her some slack. She is going to see shadows where there are none. It is to be expected the first year at the very least. You created this situation you throw her in with no warning, so don't complain when she reacts the way she does. YOU did this to her. So, help her out. Change your e-mail address. Also change your phone number. It was hard for us to change ours. Very had, changed more than just business cards. Look at it as a price you paid for messing up so horribly.

Be nice to her and comfort her. Some of the things I wish my WH would do is when I am depressed. Instead of asking me what is wrong, if he just simply came up and hugged me and told me he was sorry and thank you for the gift of reconciliation it would go a long way. I am telling this to you to try and help you out. When she gets teary eyed over a song, hug her, tell her you are sorry and thank her for not giving up on you. It will help her in healing. You need to really step up to the plate to help her heal. You did this to both of you and only you can truly help her heal. Unless you want her to leave you and heal on her own. I mean you are either part of the healing process or not. If not they why would she stick around?

So, new e-mail address and now phone number will help. Also, disable your private or incognito web browser. Let he know exactly what you do on-line at all times.

Good luck


Married 26 years
BW: Me, 47
WH: 47
DDay#2: March 8th, 2012, with one of my good friends.
DDay#1: Oct. 20th 1992, 2 years post PA
Attempting R
Without honesty, loyalty, and commitment; saying you love someone, simply means nothing.

Posts: 247 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Southwestern Area of USA
FR2012
Member
Member # 36345
Default  Posted: 8:25 PM, April 26th (Friday)

Your BS doesn't cause them self pain, you do.

Something my husband has said to me that has stuck with me is that I am his biggest trigger. I am the one that caused the pain he feels today.

When my husband found out what I did, the weeks after everything happened my husband kept tabs on me at all times. Checking emails, checking internet histories, cell phone records. You name it, he checked it. And you know at the time, it upset me but I totally understand why he did everything he did at the time.

It has been a rough year since d-day but things are looking up now.

You just need to be there for your wife and do everything you can for her.


BH (him): 28 ~ FWW (me): 27
Together 9 years
2 kids
D-Day: April 19, 2012

Posts: 167 | Registered: Aug 2012
positively4thst
Member
Member # 23998
Default  Posted: 8:31 PM, April 26th (Friday)

Listen up cowboy, you're the source of her pain. As you don't seem to grasp that, let me enlighten you.

What other sites have you been to looking for woman? What? I haven't been to any except Craigslist. She says in your mail you have date search, senior search, FB search for dating, Russian girls wanting husband

I replied are you in my Spam Mail

Wow. Reading this, I feel you are in total denial about your culpability. Also just want to say the spam box still tells a story. When I tried to find if my ex was on on dating sites, I signed up under an alias looking for the same age group, etc. that I thought he would be searching. Suddenly, when I went to sign in to my google or yahoo email, all the advertisements seemed to be aimed at "seeking Men" in my area, etc. I was so disconnected to that thought that I disregarded it for some time. Then I started to notice the connection between my searches and the advertisements that would populate my Yahoo home page/email account. Yes, some things are random, but I think you misunderstand the extent of your online presence and the data that is collected from your surfing, etc. In a nutshell, you don't get spam "Russian girls want husband" for no reason. And, you say you haven't been anywhere "but" Craigslist. Do you really understand Craigslist? What it represents and how it is used?

I hope you will take a few steps back if you are sincere in what you are trying to accomplish and take a good look at yourself. If this is all smoke and mirrors, I hope you do the right thing by definitively ending it with your wife so she can move on and find a life/happiness for herself.

[This message edited by positively4thst at 8:34 PM, April 26th (Friday)]


Posts: 1246 | Registered: May 2009
hurtmywife27
Member
Member # 38799
Default  Posted: 8:49 AM, April 27th (Saturday)

I am in business and use my laptop for graigslist, eBay, career builders, advertising, Facebook, twitter, LinkedIn. Not to sound funny but if you ever met my wife in person, not only her personality, but looks and figure, she blows away any 30 year old. She is drop dead beautiful. My phone number she doesn't have a problem with, she knows I use this for work and can get my records at anytime, I also don't delete anything on my phone, nor do I clear cookies on my laptop. The computer at work is tied into a central IT and being one of the bosses we can see where anyone has been on the computer at all times including, my partners and me, also corporate keeps a sharp eye on computer activity. Remorse oh yea big time (I) CAUSED this, it's been 6 weeks and it hit me hard 2 weeks ago and is getting worst everyday. My wife has her moments and comfort her, we are always together, even now. What we had I broke. We have been through so much and I mean so much together and when she feels like she wants to punch me in the face, sometimes wish she would, if I could beat the crap out of myself, I would. She is loving, caring, and as she says day by day. Yes sometimes can be her biggest Trigger. Songs she listens to and I listen to, never feel the need to shut off, we cry together and know the songs word for word.. We are working together and will be here as long as she excepts me. SORRY is just a word my emotions are real and her emotions are more real then ever before.

[This message edited by hurtmywife27 at 8:53 AM, April 27th (Saturday)]


WH (me) 59
BS (her) 45
D day 3/7/2013
Married 26 together 28
2 adult sons 25 and 22................................. I Totally screwed up.

Posts: 66 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Toms River NJ
losingmyground
Member
Member # 36070
Default  Posted: 1:55 PM, April 27th (Saturday)

First off...you are not far from dday at all. Just a little over a month. The pain she is feeling is caused by you and you alone.

That being said, those spam emails sent me for a loop too. You can have her send me a PM in order to confirm stuff she is finding and whether or not it is you or just spam.

Give her time and lots of hugs. Sounds like she is still at the point of digging. It will continue for quite some time. I am 10 months out and still check from time to time. The trust is coming back slowly but still not there.

And yes we cause ourselves more pain. But please realize that music, movies, tv shows, women, men, and any communication with the opposite sex will and can trigger us. Start looking through her eyes and just give her support....SHE NEEDS IT!!!

Good luck!!!


Married 13 yrs
3 kids 13, 10 & 1
I'm 34
FWH 37
Affair lasted 6 months
Ended 09/2011
Found out 06/2012
My father died during the affair
In the middle of Reconcilliation

Posts: 291 | Registered: Jul 2012
gonnabe2016
Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 2:47 PM, April 27th (Saturday)

Another aspect of this is that your BW may remember times in the past when <something> seemed *off* or *dodgy* but she didn't mention it because "my spouse would never <xyz>" or she didn't want to seem like an untrusting, needy person.

So she's most likely not going to let even the smallest *oddity* get by right now without bringing it up to you and asking about it. Expect questions anytime you're late, early, part your hair different, *start* a new activity, get dating spam in your email, take a phone call at an *off* time, watch a new TV show, etc.... It's just par for the course right now.

And realize that if you show even the smallest amount of exasperation or frustration about the questions, she will sense it and that attitude will make trust-building take just *that much* longer.


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 7948 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
hurtmywife27
Member
Member # 38799
Default  Posted: 7:44 AM, April 28th (Sunday)

Changing my e mail and limiting to people I know. Only! My wife and me had a great day together. My wife said screw the house, it will be here to rebuild, we're going to hire a sheetrocker to finish and get the load off. Just to see her smile yesterday talking to our neighbors. Thank you Sweetie for being the loving person you are.. To everyone, I don't put a stop sign up, because I always want to hear from everyone. Good or bad advise is better then no help and advise,


WH (me) 59
BS (her) 45
D day 3/7/2013
Married 26 together 28
2 adult sons 25 and 22................................. I Totally screwed up.

Posts: 66 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Toms River NJ
Wonderingwhy11
Member
Member # 34782
Default  Posted: 12:27 AM, April 29th (Monday)

Hurtmywife – Your dday was last month. She is still processing the betrayal and working through what to do. Wondering if she can believe you. Wondering if there were others. Wondering what she did to deserve this. Then trying to convince herself it was not her fault. I remember this lasting for months. The A consumed me for days. My WH couldn’t understand how I felt because he has never been cheated on.

It takes time to rebuild the trust. Even over year since DDay and nine months since second DDay I still fly in a rage when I feel he is hiding what he is doing or anything that is like is behavior during the A.

Show empathy and remorse. Stay open, honest and transparent. Importantly when she questions you and says she does not trust you say you understand and are truly sorry for hurting her and want her to trust and believe you.

MC has really helped us work through the anger and problems before, during and after the A. I strongly recommend MC.


Me BW - 46
Him WH - 53
Together 23 yrs, Married 18
DDay August 2011
2 kids - 13 and 15

Gotta love the life that we livin'


Posts: 376 | Registered: Feb 2012
libertyrocks
Member
Member # 38924
Default  Posted: 5:36 PM, April 29th (Monday)

I think you should try being a little more sensitive.

(I changed my tune.)

[This message edited by libertyrocks at 5:43 PM, April 29th (Monday)]


Me-BW 36. STBXH-35,Recovering Alcoholic, M6yrs T13. Boys 2 & 4 1/2.
DDay #1 Nov,2012. 1 1/2 year false R & TT. 10 OW PA's 1LTA (W lied to) 3 years.
S Nov, 2013 again Jan,2014
Filed for D Feb,2014.

Posts: 962 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: So Cal, baby. :)
Deeply Scared
Administrator
Member # 2
Red  Posted: 5:41 PM, April 29th (Monday)

libertyrocks...

If you can't post respectfully in this forum, you will be removed from it.

Thank you.


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 197394 | Registered: May 2002
libertyrocks
Member
Member # 38924
Default  Posted: 5:43 PM, April 29th (Monday)

I'm reall sorry hurtmywife.
I would want someone to protect my WS dignity as well.

[This message edited by libertyrocks at 6:27 PM, April 29th (Monday)]


Me-BW 36. STBXH-35,Recovering Alcoholic, M6yrs T13. Boys 2 & 4 1/2.
DDay #1 Nov,2012. 1 1/2 year false R & TT. 10 OW PA's 1LTA (W lied to) 3 years.
S Nov, 2013 again Jan,2014
Filed for D Feb,2014.

Posts: 962 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: So Cal, baby. :)
Topic Posts: 29