New Beginnings
User Topic: You know when I miss having a husband?
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 9:36 AM, April 27th (Saturday)

When I have to empty the vacuum bin after using the vacuum as my bug elimination system.

...that's about it though.

"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13784 | Registered: Jul 2011
Member # 37946
Default  Posted: 9:42 AM, April 27th (Saturday)

Lol! Pretty funny.

I'm sure I'll miss mine once I get a yard and have to mow it. :)

Me (BS)- 36
Just keep swimming, just keep swimming- Dorie

Posts: 293 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: Southeastern U.S.
Member # 21925
Default  Posted: 9:47 AM, April 27th (Saturday)

(Spits coffee laughing)
How poetic. This has so many ways it could be used as a joke.

BS 43 (me)
FWH 48
D-day 9/07

Dont retreat, reload.
"Pull that knife out of your back - and sever the fuel line to that bus you got thrown under" Bufffalo

Posts: 1033 | Registered: Dec 2008
Member # 26152
Default  Posted: 10:46 AM, April 27th (Saturday)

I miss having a husband when I have to lift something heavy. That's about it.

Me --> BS
D-Day 10-1988
D-Day 9-12-2005
S 9-13-2005
D 3-6-12

Posts: 1500 | Registered: Nov 2009 | From: Kentucky
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 10:48 AM, April 27th (Saturday)

My INSTANT thought at this title?

NEVER. So I thought about it some more....

Nope, going with NEVER.

Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5859 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 10:56 AM, April 27th (Saturday)

I'd rather have a bath in the contents myself.

The ONLY thing I miss is waking up with a lump in my back. Embarrassing but true. Its the only think I'm wistful about. Although I have found its not too difficult to replace - if I can stand the 'complications'.

I guess we can tick off the first item on my list of 'must haves' of my ideal guy eh?

I'm a deep thinker, I am.

I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5608 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Sad in AZ
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 10:59 AM, April 27th (Saturday)

Bah! I couldn't even say that; I was the vermin eliminator in our house--especially mice. He was deathly afraid. I'm talking about a man who weighed 270 lbs and stood 6'2". I walked into the room one day and he was standing on a chair--there was a mouse in the lovebird's cage (free-standing on the floor) I don't know who was yelling louder--the X or the bird!

I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20272 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 11:09 AM, April 27th (Saturday)


monster is afraid of the dark (6", over 100kgs/220lb). Ironic, no?

There were spirits in our old house that used to 'harass' him. He would have to leave rooms sometimes. He hated them. My babies and I loved them - I felt comforted by their presence. I had forgotten about that until just now.

I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5608 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 11:13 AM, April 27th (Saturday)

I miss my husband when I have to scoop the dog poop.

It was the one thing he would do. I hate scooping dog shit.

"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4683 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
Member # 28127
Default  Posted: 12:37 PM, April 27th (Saturday)

I hate being the one to kill the spiders/bugs now that it's just me and the kids.

One day the kids found a spider on the stairs. DS4 thought it was pretty cool....and I seriously considered having him kill it and put it in the garbage. I decided to suck it up and kill it myself. haha

Me - Now 36 y/o
WXH: Now 45 y/o and 18+ hrs away -NPD asshole now onto wife #3.
My sweeties: 5 yr old B/G twins. 90% custody (or more) since 14 months old.
D-Day 4/4/10 PA('s?) & EA's - D'd 7/11

Posts: 1691 | Registered: Apr 2010 | From: Upper Midwest
Member # 36654
Default  Posted: 12:41 PM, April 27th (Saturday)

I missed XWH#1 because he could fix anything, not that he would mind you, but he had the know how to..

Got STBXWH#2 and he can't do anything that a normal man can do... Came from the city to live with me on my farm, so you can guess what a fiasco this has been. Damnit now I have to learn how to cut the grass again with that weird lawnmower we just had to have. I want a steering wheel, not two levers to try and control. Should be real interesting.

M-9 yrs T-11 yrs
4 children-none together
DD#1-9/5/11 LTA 2yrs
DD#2-7/3/12 False R
DD#3-4/29/13 (OW broke NC)
Status: Your guess is as good as mine.

Posts: 2420 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Texas
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 12:53 PM, April 27th (Saturday)

The only thing I could NOT do after he left was back the camper up onto the pad on the side of the house.

After a several hours and few escapades in getting the camper situated. I found a neighbor to do it for me.

That's it. all the yard work, I already knew how to do. All the home repairs, I figured out thanks to youtube. Electrical issues.. took care of them. Vehicles - I did those too. Well made the appts and took the car in.

Last year I sold the camper, this year I got rid of the van that towed the camper. The camper pad is quickly becoming my staging area for my gardening fetish.

Not missing him at all ... just his paycheck.

I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5249 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 1:57 PM, April 27th (Saturday)

I miss having someone to hold down the couch while I go to work every day....

That's about it. Everything else, I call my brother or just write a check. So much less drama.

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7761 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 3:03 PM, April 27th (Saturday)

As I recently told my vet, I miss that he would grind the dogs nails weekly, because I can't do it, and I have to take them in constantly. I also miss the poop scooping.

He wasn't much for house repair - we always called someone.

So, I guess that's it.

Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling

Posts: 4607 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
Member # 4286
Default  Posted: 4:06 PM, April 27th (Saturday)

My ex did the dishes. It was kind of a zen thing for him. He loaded the dishwasher horribly, only removed enough to put in the next batch of dirty dishes, and never scrubbed the scrambled eggs off anything (so it went 20 rounds in the dishwasher).

I hate doing dishes. HATE. I miss having an empty sink at all times. Seriously. That is about it for what I miss. So sad, really.

Divorced - recovered and hoping to help.

"We're not broken, just bent, and we can learn to love again" ~Pink

Posts: 3085 | Registered: May 2004 | From: Midwest
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 5:02 PM, April 27th (Saturday)

I don't miss having MY (ex) husband.... just anyone who I could make empty the bug bin would do, really.

"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13784 | Registered: Jul 2011
Member # 35912
Default  Posted: 5:07 PM, April 27th (Saturday)

I miss having a husband when I have to....


wait a minute....

got it!

filing taxes! don't you get more deductions if you are married??

Posts: 499 | Registered: Jun 2012
Member # 38010
Default  Posted: 7:34 AM, April 28th (Sunday)

Good grief, I don't think he ever did a darn thing I could miss... I just have one less person's clothing and dishes to deal with!!

Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.

Posts: 505 | Registered: Jan 2013
Member # 32847
Default  Posted: 7:46 AM, April 28th (Sunday)

I'm with Charlie Foxtrot on this one. I'm finding it hard to miss anything. He was deployed a lot and even when he was home, he was not very involved. I'd have to say he spends more time with the kids on his eow now than he ever did. And my momma raised me not to "need" a man. I even change my own oil!

Tune out the noise of what others tell you about who you are and work it out for yourself...

Posts: 1650 | Registered: Jul 2011
Member # 9772
Default  Posted: 8:02 AM, April 28th (Sunday)

I'd have to go with -when lifting something heavy. But that's it.

I did the housekeeping, yard work when he "couldn't get to it", plumbing, catch n' release of bugs (I'm spider friendly), raising of kids. All of it. Now I just have one less big messy child to watch after.

"Put the cuckoo back in the clock baby" - Four Brothers

Posts: 872 | Registered: Feb 2006
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 6:16 PM, April 28th (Sunday)

Finding it hard as well to miss anything. Hired a cleaning guy and crew, a yard guy and crew for the hard stuff and a handyman for all the little things that need to be fixed.

As my friend said: "you are paying, but now you are actually getting something in return."

Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1259 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, April 28th (Sunday)

Maybe I miss having an adult male in the house for heavy lifting, but even then, we were pretty evenly matched. It's more that I sometimes need a second person to help (like when putting a window AC unit in). Fortunately, I have strong brothers who are willing to come out a couple times a year to help me if I feed them.

STBX couldn't do anything in terms of fixing or other house-related chores any better than I could. I can call the fix-it guys and drop the car at the shop as competently as he can!

BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3620 | Registered: Oct 2011
Member # 30527
Default  Posted: 9:24 PM, April 28th (Sunday)

One word...never

Cheat On A Good Woman and Karma Will Make Sure You End Up With The Bitch You Deserve!

Posts: 116 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Never Never Land
Member # 33539
Default  Posted: 11:45 AM, April 29th (Monday)

I miss having a husband.

Just not the husband I had.

S, Filed 4/17/14--YAY, ME!!

Posts: 512 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: New York
Member # 34146
Default  Posted: 8:00 PM, April 29th (Monday)

I miss having someone with whom I can share really great news, in detail.

Of course, I didn't have that for most of my marriage since he'd always put me down and minimize anything good compared to him, but that is one thing I look forward to in my next relationship.

Until then, I just journal.

Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!

Married: 11 years, no kids

Character is destiny

Posts: 3400 | Registered: Dec 2011
Member # 6556
Default  Posted: 9:48 PM, April 29th (Monday)

..not so much a husband as just another set of hands...when I need to zip up the back of my dress. Nothing worse than when the kids are gone, I am in a rush and I can't get the zipper past my bra-line (damn, should have stuck with yoga!)
I end up having to run (half naked) across the street to my widowed neighbor and hope she is home to finish dressing me.

Don't waste your whole life trying to get back what was taken away.

Posts: 1223 | Registered: Feb 2005
Member # 33523
Default  Posted: 12:49 AM, April 30th (Tuesday)

... every stupid day. I'll get over it, I suppose.

Me: MH 40s; Him: MH 40s (I had RA)
OW: 30s, moron; one of many
M: 8 yrs
3/13: D'd
Everything is as it should be.

Posts: 762 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Vulcania
Member # 10552
Default  Posted: 11:59 AM, April 30th (Tuesday)

I'm thinking.

If I'd had a good one, I'm sure I would have a different answer.

Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan

Posts: 15411 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Now an AZ girl
Member # 36060
Default  Posted: 12:08 PM, April 30th (Tuesday)

I am in the box-lifting, jar-opening camp. I am in an apartment instead of a rental house purposely so I don't have to worry about lawns.

I also miss a husband (although not necessarily *my* husband) when DS6 loses his shit. He is over 4 feet tall and 50 lbs.

BS-Me 30s
WS-Him 30s
D-Day 4/2012 (Insisted EA only)
D-Day 5/2012 (Did I say EA? Ummm..)
Numerous other TT/broken NC d-days until S 1/2013. D settled 11/2013
MOW-coworker, 40s.
2 DS and DD all w/autism

Posts: 739 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: USA
Member # 31421
Default  Posted: 11:31 PM, April 30th (Tuesday)

If mine had acted like a husband maybe I would have missed having one. I am told though, there are plenty of good men out there, so maybe I will be lucky enough to find a good man so I know what I was missing.

Posts: 2175 | Registered: Mar 2011
Topic Posts: 30