New Beginnings
User Topic: NB with 6 girls in the house
Member # 30742
Happy  Posted: 11:10 PM, May 4th (Saturday)

So here we are - 2 women, 44 and 45 years old. With 4 daughters between us, ages 10, 14, 15 and 16. Guys, you have no clue what is going here when it is that time of the month...

After my STBXH moved out last October, I took my friend and my oldest daughter's GirlScout Leader in with her two daughters. Her STBXH is a meth-head and alcoholic. She is divorcing him. She is getting back on her feet financially after bankruptcy and was looking for a safe place for her and her girls. I figured she was the best roommate I could ever find. I have known her for 10 years.

So here we are tonight: 3 cats, 3 bunnies, 2 birds, countless fish, 3 teens, 1 pre-teen and 2 adult women, most of us crashing in the living room (minus the fish and the bunnies, who enjoy a nice backyard), sharing pizza and popcorn, moms sharing some wine and beer and watching a movie together. So much fun and it is so relaxing....

Tomorrow morning we will have a big breakfast together with eggs and bacon and pancakes, my DD 15 and my friend's DD 14 will do their homework together, DD 10 will play with the cats and bunnies, DD 16 will enjoy her own room and as moms we will rock on for our girls, making sure they are provided for and are happy to be in this house. I will cook dinner tomorrow night as I am the cook in the house and my friend will take care of laundry and other things that need to be done around the house. I will be planting our herb garden and plan dinner for this week.

I could not ask for a better NB. This is the healthiest environment for our girls. No cheating, no drugs - just a warm, welcoming place where they can bring their friends, will be fed and clothed and hugged 24x7 and will learn to be strong women hopefully.

No further point to this post, just happy to have a NB with a great friend and no drama!!!

Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1253 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 11:13 PM, May 4th (Saturday)

What an awesome arrangement. Can I come hang at your house with my DD14? I'll bring wine. Promise.

You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams

Posts: 25316 | Registered: Aug 2011
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 11:35 PM, May 4th (Saturday)

NIK, you would be so welcome. And so would be all SI sisters and brothers

Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1253 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
Member # 19595
Default  Posted: 11:48 PM, May 4th (Saturday)

You are brave women !Preteens and teens..wears me out thinking about it.

I'm so happy you all have each other.
And safe !!!!

Hugs for your full house.

It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.

Posts: 20371 | Registered: May 2008 | From: Half way to where I want to be.
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 12:28 AM, May 5th (Sunday)

Those have to be happy cat's!

BH 51, WW 42
DS 23(Mine),SD 21,SS 20(Hers),DS 9 Ours, DGS 3, DGD 1 mo
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 10yrs
I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 2828 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
Member # 26152
Default  Posted: 12:54 AM, May 5th (Sunday)

You and your friend are setting a wonderful example for your daughters. You are modeling strength and resilience, and showing them the beauty of women sticking together and supporting each other.

I love it! You all rock!!

Me --> BS
D-Day 10-1988
D-Day 9-12-2005
S 9-13-2005
D 3-6-12

Posts: 1500 | Registered: Nov 2009 | From: Kentucky
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 2:10 AM, May 5th (Sunday)

Great post!! So excited for you all!

Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling

Posts: 4516 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
Member # 36445
Default  Posted: 2:15 AM, May 5th (Sunday)

That is nice that you all can get along and help each other out in this nightmare of infidelity and divorce.

Here's to great new beginnings

"Loving someone should not mean losing you. Love empowers you. It shouldn't erase you. - Thelma Davis.

Posts: 1331 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Australia
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 11:34 AM, May 5th (Sunday)

Love to hear it.

DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

Posts: 17390 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
Member # 23890
Default  Posted: 11:47 AM, May 5th (Sunday)

This post makes me Thank you for sharing!! Still ing!!

"We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." Joseph Campbell...So, If fear was not a factor - what would you do?

Posts: 4113 | Registered: May 2009 | From: New England
Member # 10798
Default  Posted: 11:58 AM, May 5th (Sunday)

double post.

[This message edited by meaniemouse at 12:02 PM, May 5th (Sunday)]

Act as if what you do matters. It does. William James

Posts: 2110 | Registered: May 2006 | From: Midwest
Member # 10798
Default  Posted: 12:01 PM, May 5th (Sunday)

Wow--this is a great example of making lemonade out of lemons for sure! I think this sounds like a wonderful solution for all of you. I'm sure you'll have your ups and downs but the best thing is what all of you have is your own support group without having to leave home. Good for you!

My only advice is I would make sure you have an emergency stash of chocolate for that time of the month. I have three daughters and when we were all living together there would be a "seek and destroy" mission for chocolate every month.

[This message edited by meaniemouse at 12:01 PM, May 5th (Sunday)]

Act as if what you do matters. It does. William James

Posts: 2110 | Registered: May 2006 | From: Midwest
Member # 33129
Default  Posted: 3:31 PM, May 5th (Sunday)


I know someone with an arrangement like this in my neighborhood too - the two moms didn't want to move to a small apartment, and pooling money and resources was the smartest thing they could do!

A friend of mine approached me with this type of scenario as well, but I'm not there yet and like my newfound "space" and alone-ness!

Good for you!

divorced the Dooosh
even if you find your voice,
sometimes it does not matter anymore,
when you speak to a man who is deaf by choice.

Posts: 3582 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: Happyville
Member # 33581
Default  Posted: 3:53 PM, May 6th (Monday)

If Happy Ever After did exist, I would still be holding you like this.
All those fairly tales are full of shit.
One more fucking love song I'll be sick. ~ Maroon 5

Posts: 1031 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Kailua-Kona, HI
Topic Posts: 14