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Just Found Out
User Topic: Any tips on getting through an affair with a best friend?
January24
New Member
Member # 39185
Default  Posted: 1:44 PM, May 6th (Monday)

I am brand new to this site but need help with mind movies and memories? Even with setting up the site.I found out 1/24/13 that my husband of 10 years was having an EA and PA with my BFF. We have been to MC and IC. The thoughts are still running high. I do have my good and bad days, but that is in comparison to the early weeks. It still crosses my mind 95 % of the day at least. Many days I find it hard to act normal, but some how do. I journal. But how could they. I haven't contacted her except the day I found out, but at that time it was "only text messaging" like 2400 in a month. Now I know all of it through him and emails, I think. Many lies before now, so how do I know it is really all out. I don't but at some point I have to. He says he wants to stay and work on our marriage. I hope that is true. Is there anyone out there with the double betrayal that can help me?


He- 44yo
Me- 38yo
Married- 10y/together almost 15yrs.
2 children- 8 boy; 7girl
OW- 44yo (my BFF so I thought)
great marriage, never would of believed it from anyone, including from another BFF. Completely trusted him to the max. And that is what

Posts: 4 | Registered: May 2013
Tred
Member
Member # 34086
Default  Posted: 1:51 PM, May 6th (Monday)

January,

Sorry you are here, but I'm glad you found this site. There is a whole section devoted to Double Betrayals under the "I Can Relate (ICR)" topics - the current conversations are at the top on page two if you look under ICR. There are plenty of people here that have dealt with or are dealing with this issue.


Married: 17 years (14 @JFO)
D-Day: 11/09/11
"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

Posts: 3741 | Registered: Dec 2011
January24
New Member
Member # 39185
Default  Posted: 3:01 PM, May 6th (Monday)

I'm sorry but I have spent an hour trying to figure out where to go to post on Double Betrayal. I appreciate you telling me where to go and I did find it, but can you help me learn to post. Hope you are still there.


He- 44yo
Me- 38yo
Married- 10y/together almost 15yrs.
2 children- 8 boy; 7girl
OW- 44yo (my BFF so I thought)
great marriage, never would of believed it from anyone, including from another BFF. Completely trusted him to the max. And that is what

Posts: 4 | Registered: May 2013
lieshurt
Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 3:07 PM, May 6th (Monday)

When you are in a topic, you should be able to see the "Post Reply" option at the top, right of your screen. Click on it and then it gives you a box to type in and post.

[This message edited by lieshurt at 3:09 PM, May 6th (Monday)]


I'm sorry if you don't like my Honesty, but to be fair I don't like your lies.

Sometimes it's better to push someone away...not because you stopped loving them but because you can't take the pain anymore.


Posts: 13647 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
January24
New Member
Member # 39185
Default  Posted: 3:21 PM, May 6th (Monday)

ok. so maybe I am dumb, all I have is print topic. Am I missing something? is this a sign too?


He- 44yo
Me- 38yo
Married- 10y/together almost 15yrs.
2 children- 8 boy; 7girl
OW- 44yo (my BFF so I thought)
great marriage, never would of believed it from anyone, including from another BFF. Completely trusted him to the max. And that is what

Posts: 4 | Registered: May 2013
lieshurt
Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 3:25 PM, May 6th (Monday)

You can also go to page 49, scroll to the bottom, right and you'll see a "Post reply to this topic" option there.


I'm sorry if you don't like my Honesty, but to be fair I don't like your lies.

Sometimes it's better to push someone away...not because you stopped loving them but because you can't take the pain anymore.


Posts: 13647 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
aesir
Member
Member # 17210
Default  Posted: 4:08 PM, May 6th (Monday)

You would post to any topic the same way you posted follow ups on this one.

To find the double betrayal thread, go to the main page by clicking on forums, then click on the I Can Relate Forum, then click on the double betrayal thread.


Your mileage may vary... in accordance with the prophecy.

Do not back up. Severe tire damage.


Posts: 14924 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Winnipeg
LadyYoga
Member
Member # 28611
Default  Posted: 4:15 PM, May 6th (Monday)

I just private messaged you.


BS (me) 39
WH 50
DD,DS,DS
D-day 3/11/10 (3 month EA,1 week PA)
Whore was my best friend

Posts: 700 | Registered: May 2010
Sadden in OK
New Member
Member # 31791
Default  Posted: 4:51 PM, May 6th (Monday)

My wh had two affair during our marriage but the one that hurt the most was with my BFF. I would tell her all my fears and needed her help in finding out. Well I guess that made me the fool. She would use it to get closer to him. I still don't have many girl friends because of this but it does get better. This site has been a blessing to me and many others.

Posts: 31 | Registered: Apr 2011
Topic Posts: 9