SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
Wayward Side
User Topic: Linkedin
WWMEH13
Member
Member # 38722
Default  Posted: 1:06 PM, May 16th (Thursday)

I have a profile on Linkedin, and as I work in sales, I use it quite heavily to network and prospect for work. In fact, this week, I landed a huge appointment because of it. Former AP is also on Linkedin, and I am unable to block him, without completely making my profile private, which defeats the purpose of a networking site. About once every two weeks I notice my former AP shows up in the "who has viewed your profile" section. It really makes mental NC difficult, and yesterday, I clicked on his, which makes me even madder that I let him get to me like that. I am sure his wife monitors his account, and heck, maybe it is her looking at my profile.

Has this happened to anyone else? Suggestions?


WW - 38
BH - 38
EA/PA - 8 months
Married 4 years together 7
2 Ddays, same AP last one in December 2012
NC - 2/1/2013
DS - 2 years old

Status - Divorcing


Posts: 80 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: USA
20WrongsVs1
Member
Member # 39000
Default  Posted: 1:10 PM, May 16th (Thursday)

While logged into LinkedIn go here:

http://www.linkedin.com/people/conn-break-selection

Oh, but that's probably stupid, sorry. He's probably not one of your connections. If you go to "Settings" there are some things there, such as "show/hide 'Viewers of this profile also viewed' box". Which means you'll have to hide everyone. But it beats completely tanking your own profile.

[This message edited by 20WrongsVs1 at 1:15 PM, May 16th (Thursday)]


fWW: 42
BH: 52
DDay: April 21, 2013
Sweet DS & fierce DD, under 10
"Between stimulus and response there’s a space, in that space lies our power to choose our response, in our response lies our growth and our freedom." V. Frankl

Posts: 1236 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Redneck land
needhelp123
Member
Member # 38109
Default  Posted: 1:28 PM, May 16th (Thursday)

Happened to me. I can't say I used it often but it was a way to stay connected to the people in my industry. When I saw that the AP viewed my profile I tried to block it as well but also ended up creating the same situation you did - she assumed I was looking at her profile. I wasn't. Regardless, to ensure no more of this I deleted my profile. To me it was a no brainer as I wanted nothing to do with her at all and I didn't want my BS to have to worry about another way of communication. She sat next to me as I deleted it and I haven't looked back.


Me: 47 BS: Cheerless (not giving her age)
DDay 12/31/12
30 days of TT WRONG - try 17 months
2 great teenagers
I had a LTA - EA and then PA. Escalated in 2012.
Never Giving Up Hope
The secret of life is to "die before you die" - Eckhart Tolle

Posts: 92 | Registered: Jan 2013
WWMEH13
Member
Member # 38722
Default  Posted: 3:03 PM, May 16th (Thursday)

I removed him as a connection in December, but there is no way to block him. I even searched it on their site, and it is just not an option now. Hoping they change that.

The problem is I use the site every day for work. I just don't want to have to hide my profile. If I notice he views my profile, I guess I just try and condition myself to come here, rather than give into the temptation of viewing his in return.


WW - 38
BH - 38
EA/PA - 8 months
Married 4 years together 7
2 Ddays, same AP last one in December 2012
NC - 2/1/2013
DS - 2 years old

Status - Divorcing


Posts: 80 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: USA
Beyond
Member
Member # 3011
Default  Posted: 3:11 PM, May 16th (Thursday)

Who cares if he views your profile?

I understand why you don't want to hide all your connections - that really defeats the purpose of LinkedIn.

Is your BH aware of this issue and, if so, does he know all the ways you've tried to address it? Sounds like you're being transparent

If OM views your profile, ignore. Period.

{{{WWME}}}


XOW.

Posts: 360 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Virginia
WWMEH13
Member
Member # 38722
Default  Posted: 3:44 PM, May 16th (Thursday)

Thanks Beyond. I think it has just been a trigger for me. I know now, that instead of doing it back, I'll just ignore, and come here. I really am trying with mental NC, and it is just a bit harder with this.


WW - 38
BH - 38
EA/PA - 8 months
Married 4 years together 7
2 Ddays, same AP last one in December 2012
NC - 2/1/2013
DS - 2 years old

Status - Divorcing


Posts: 80 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: USA
lovedmesomehim
Member
Member # 25743
Default  Posted: 4:06 PM, May 16th (Thursday)

Uh-oh! I am not connected to Linkedin...I do look though!

Are you guys saying that my email addy or something else comes up to identify me?

When oh when, will I ever learn my lesson?

Edited: Sorry! I'm a FBS and thought I was in Investigative Tips. Sorry!

[This message edited by lovedmesomehim at 9:25 PM, May 16th (Thursday)]


Posts: 467 | Registered: Oct 2009
hatefulnow
Member
Member # 35603
Default  Posted: 8:11 AM, May 29th (Wednesday)

Show a little strength and integrity and push through. You had a good idea to come here to avoid temptation. Good luck.

Posts: 128 | Registered: May 2012
Topic Posts: 8