Wayward Side
User Topic: Getting Rid of Things
Member # 38109
Default  Posted: 1:40 PM, May 16th (Thursday)

Not sure how much this means to anyone but myself but I will post anyway. Today I sold another item on eBay. This is the second item sold in the last few weeks that remind me either of my affair or the person I became. Today it was a pen that I carried around with me. I guess you could say it was a status symbol for me. Everyone at work knew about it as it was prominently displayed on my shirt each day. Prior to this I unloaded my iPad. It was on this iPad that my BS discovered my affair and I have been unable to use it since then. Yes, WS' can also trigger. Just before that I sold my car - also a status symbol. Today I drive an 8 year old truck (which I love), use my iPhone if I need to get to the internet or do something for work, and use a mechanical pencil which I seem to have grown an unusual attachment too. I miss none of these. I like being able to just be myself.

My own t/j: This weekend I am hoping to plant some flowers at our home. Turns out I really like doing this and I like pretty flowers. Again, I like being myself and not worrying about what others think. I wish I didn't take a path of destruction to get here.

Me: 47 BS: Cheerless (not giving her age)
DDay 12/31/12
30 days of TT WRONG - try 17 months
2 great teenagers
I had a LTA - EA and then PA. Escalated in 2012.
Never Giving Up Hope
The secret of life is to "die before you die" - Eckhart Tolle

Posts: 92 | Registered: Jan 2013
Member # 26349
Default  Posted: 1:50 PM, May 16th (Thursday)

I don't normally post in WS but I had to after reading this!

Good for you for doing this.

ME(BS):47 HIM (WS):50
WS Married 21 yrs together 33
dd#1- nov 16, 2009
DD#2-went out NYE 2009-found out Feb 2012
DD#2-Feb 5, 2010-date they had(found out Feb 2012)
dd#3 - June 16, 2010-broke NC
dd#4-Dec 31, 2010-broke contact
DD#5-Feb 21, 201

Posts: 187 | Registered: Nov 2009
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 6:31 PM, May 16th (Thursday)

Good for you, for taking something that made you feel horrible and getting rid of it! And best of luck with the flowers. I love them, but cannot grow them. I have the black thumb-o-death for plants. May they give both of you much enjoyment.

Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012

Posts: 4926 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 7:04 PM, May 16th (Thursday)

I like being able to just be myself.

Love love love this. It's amazing how shedding these material things can make us so much lighter, physically and in our hearts. It's a great way to eliminate triggers too.

Awesome work.

Cherish those who seek the truth but beware of those who find it. - François-Marie Arouet

Posts: 17832 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Member # 37735
Default  Posted: 7:16 PM, May 16th (Thursday)

No stop sign, so I hope it is ok if I post.

It's amazing how shedding these material things can make us so much lighter, physically and in our hearts.

I think we live in a very superficial , material culture (just take a look at some of the movies that are recently out).
We , on this site, are all looking at deeper things.
I think we are all, WSs & BSs alike, starting to see what's important in life. Love, family, trust.
I tend to be very sentimental & it is difficult for me to throw out one of my kid's drawing from kindergarten(& there are many of them, believe me)---I 've been this way my whole life.
After Dday, it was so strange. I found I was throwing out everything. I just wanted a clean start. A new life. An uncluttered life.
So that is one thing that has changed.
The trauma of our bond being broken, & WH & I trying to forge a new stronger one, has made us both realize what is important in life, & it is not material possessions. It is love. Time spent together.

together 25 yrs, married 24 yrs, 4 children;Rebuilding
D Day: 5/10/2011 PA
OW: WH's co-worker,divorced, no children, 20 yrs younger than I-----& she knew he was married, had met our kids, but that did not stop her from trying to destroy our family

Posts: 1396 | Registered: Dec 2012
Topic Posts: 5