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User Topic: Passing gas - wdyt?
wannabenormal
Member
Member # 19772
Default  Posted: 1:21 AM, May 17th (Friday)

In sharing with others, it seems my views on passing gas are dated and/or silly.

I do not ever use the word 'fart'. I find it blech-y (but I do use blech-y...?!)

I do not ever intentionally toot in front of others.

In the 4 yrs I was with a serious BF before XH, I never tooted in front of him. We also never lived together.

In the 14 yrs that I was with XH, I tooted twice ever. Once in my sleep (it woke us both up, damn!) and the other time because we were horsing around and he squeezed it out of me. I CRIED about it the first time!

And for the record, I never once heard him toot either! We were not ones to tell each other we were pooping either. All that is pretty private, kwim?

So...what's your take on passing gas?

1) I do it when I need to. Not a big deal. (and if you do that, do you acknowledge, like oops? Or excuse me?)

2) I don't sit around busting ass, but also am not embarrassed if it happens

3) Would leave a room to do it and would DIE if someone heard me.

I'm a #3 for sure.



Posts: 14389 | Registered: Jun 2008
bluelady
Member
Member # 11061
Default  Posted: 5:15 AM, May 17th (Friday)

I guess it depends who I'm around. If it's just me and SO, or me and my family, then this

2) I don't sit around busting ass, but also am not embarrassed if it happens

is me.

If we're talking anyone other than my family, then I'm definitely this:

3) Would leave a room to do it and would DIE if someone heard me.

It took me YEARS before I would toot in front of SO. After we moved in together, I trained my body to only go Number 2 first thing in the morning, so I could immediately jump in the shower, with the fan on, and give the air time to dissipate.

One bout of a stomach virus cured me of that


Me (BS): 35

Divorced


Posts: 1456 | Registered: Jun 2006 | From: a little bit of everywhere
travels
Member
Member # 20334
Default  Posted: 6:08 AM, May 17th (Friday)

The word was like a swear word in my house growing up. I still don't say it.

I'd say overall I am a #3. I don't want to listen to others doing it all the time, so why would I do it to someone else?

t/j - I teach 3rd grade. It's instant embarrassment for a kid who lets one slip, followed by giggles and red faces.


When one door closes, another door opens. It's the journey through the hallway that sucks.

Posts: 3777 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: PA
Sad in AZ
Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 6:35 AM, May 17th (Friday)

Meh; it's perfectly natural, but I'm still a 6-year old when it happens.

I try to not offend others, but it happens. If there's a dog available, always blame the dog.

I worked for a man who ate a pretty much raw diet and obviously had no shame. He'd fart--very loudly--in the office (luckily, he was only in the office 1-2 hrs a day). It was a very small office with 5 of us in addition to him. It was an occasion for lots of eye rolling and silent laughter.


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20284 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
Undefinabl3
Member
Member # 36883
Default  Posted: 7:34 AM, May 17th (Friday)

My husband is more like a number 0

He will actually tell me "come here i need to tell you something' and then fart in my general direction...

He will score them sometimes by how many people leave the room...dogs are double points.

He will actually carpet bomb people at Walmart just to see their reactions. (i have to admit though, this was is pretty funny sometimes)

And usually, he will giggle like a little school girl when he gets a really good one out.

I on the other hand...have farted in front of him a few times, but I dont like to.


Me: 31 MH
Him: 37 MH
New online find 6/19/14 - shit

Posts: 1767 | Registered: Sep 2012
circe
Member
Member # 6687
Default  Posted: 8:14 AM, May 17th (Friday)

I don't know, once we had a baby together, I was pretty fine with DH hearing or seeing anything body related. After the birth and all that entails, and then a tiny baby with enough gas and puke and poo for ten normal sized adults, the stigma was kind of erased from it for us.

However DH just isn't a gassy sort of guy. Gas just doesn't seem to escape from him that I can hear. He also doesn't have any body odor. He pretty much just lucked out in that department.

But for the rest of us mere mortals in the house we just have rules that govern the proper places to let loose, and then if accidents should happen, a laugh, an eye roll or something and it's forgotten. Oh, but DH will still giggle like a little boy if I accidentally let one slip. I'm a little embarrassed if it's sudden and an accident, but it leaves my mind pretty quickly.


Posts: 3193 | Registered: Mar 2005
sharim
Member
Member # 11937
Default  Posted: 8:14 AM, May 17th (Friday)

I'm a #3. Never say the "f" word. However my kids - 2 boys and a girl - are #1s plus announce and laugh etc about it. I get it with the boys but my daughter just shocks me. I guess it is cool that they are so relaxed about it since it is a very natural thing.

Posts: 1385 | Registered: Sep 2006
Amazonia
Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 8:52 AM, May 17th (Friday)

I grew up in a #3 home, and am very much a #3 myself. XH and I only lived together for about 10 months, but I actually don't think I ever poo'd while he was in the apartment.

Have you seen the show Scrubs? The female lead, Eliot, is a self proclaimed "nervous poo-er" (meaning she can't usually go away from home, etc.) ... that's me.


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13798 | Registered: Jul 2011
jennie160
Member
Member # 29949
Default  Posted: 9:27 AM, May 17th (Friday)

My husband is more like a number 0

This was my XH. It lost it's charm pretty quickly.

Current SO and I have been dating for about 2.5 years and still maintain between a #2 and #3. We aren't embarrassed if one slips out but also don't intentionally let one rip. When SO is pooping he will lock the bedroom door so I don't accidentally walk into the bedroom even thought there is also a door to the master bathroom. The TV in living room also backs to the master bath so any noise is muffled by the tv. And if he has to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night he will use the main bathroom and not the master. We also won't pee in front of the other. I much prefer this to XH's intentionally bombing me. Everybody poops but I don't need to know (or smell) it.


Posts: 921 | Registered: Oct 2010
tired girl
Member
Member # 28053
Default  Posted: 10:00 AM, May 17th (Friday)

I had three boys, so living in a house with four males, take a guess on how it was in my house

[This message edited by tired girl at 10:01 AM, May 17th (Friday)]


Me45 Him 45 Hardlessons DS 25,23,20
D Day 1/18/10 his 3/8/2012 mine
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Eleanor Roosevelt

Posts: 5068 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: az
little turtle
Member
Member # 15584
Default  Posted: 10:02 AM, May 17th (Friday)

I'm a 3. SO has never heard me toot. I go to the opposite floor of the house to use the bathroom (if he is upstairs, I go down. If he is downstairs, I go up). Or I wait till he leaves.

SO is a 1. If the kids are around, he usually says excuse me.


Failure is success if we learn from it.

Posts: 4202 | Registered: Aug 2007 | From: michigan
Nature_Girl
Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 10:10 AM, May 17th (Friday)

I'm a #3. I also don't say the f-word.

My kids are #2 or #1. Plus they say the f-word frequently and get a big laugh out of it.


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y

Posts: 9823 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
somanyyears
Member
Member # 26970
Default  Posted: 10:19 AM, May 17th (Friday)


..

the humour around this topic cracks me up..

..for some, the louder, the better..they pride themselves on their talent to let one go for the greatest shock value!

..my older brother was famous for using the old "PULL MY FINGER" ploy to drop a rose!

..as an elementary teacher, there were kids in class who let loose with thunderous cheek flapping farts that drew the ire of fellow classmates, oooing and awwwing at the noise and the offensive odour.

..they would appeal to me that i should chastise the culprit with writing lines at recess.."I will NOT fart in class." a hundred times!

..a former vice- principal was able to clear the entire staff room in seconds when he would pass wind.. they were toxic.

..best straegy though?? yes, blame the dog!!

..for me, personally.... I NEVER fart, never have, never will..

and if you believe that, i have some prime swamp land in Florida i could sell you cheap!!

smy..


trust no other human- love only your pets
She isn't and never was who I thought..I can't believe who I married and what she did to us.
Me 67
Her 63
Married 42 yrs (together 47)
18 yr LTA with bf


Posts: 4129 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: the sad state of affairs
MissesJai
Member
Member # 24849
Default  Posted: 10:34 AM, May 17th (Friday)

My husband is more like a number 0
as is mine. He has a rating system and everything. It's pretty funny.
He will actually tell me "come here i need to tell you something' and then fart in my general direction...
Mine too - or he will try the dutch oven with me.
He will actually carpet bomb people at Walmart just to see their reactions.
Mine calls it crop dusting. And he does it in just about any public place. I also have 2 boys, so I'm right there with TG.


FWW - 41
"Don't think first about the risks of speaking up. Think first about the risks of not speaking up." ~ Kerry Patterson

Posts: 5975 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: So Cal.....
Newlease
Member
Member # 7767
Default  Posted: 10:37 AM, May 17th (Friday)

I raised 2 boys. Fart jokes were very prevalent in my home.

I find that as I get older, I have more trouble with gas. I try not to ever do it in public or in front of anyone, but sometimes my body just has a mind of its own. They slip out before I even have a warning they are coming.

I am always embarrassed, but I really can't help it. Guess I could just spend a couple of hours in the bathroom after each meal, just in case.

There are far more important things to worry about than inadvertent gas leakage.

NL


Even if you can't control the world around you, you are still the master of your own soul.

Posts: 7739 | Registered: Aug 2005
StillGoing
Member
Member # 28571
Default  Posted: 11:38 AM, May 17th (Friday)

I do not ever intentionally toot in front of others.

"Mama tooted" is a favorite song around our house. Well, not mama's favorite but the kids love it.


"You have insulted my footwear."

Posts: 7477 | Registered: May 2010 | From: USA
RyeBread
Member
Member # 37437
Default  Posted: 12:04 PM, May 17th (Friday)

Hey, in some countries it's taken as a compliment

Growing up my brothers and I would have "gas wars". We'd try and stink each other out of the room.

Now that I'm older I can't bring myself to do it in front of strangers and especially women. I'll do it in front of my sons, brothers, etc. But not in front of women. Not sure why but something psychologically won't let me do it. It slips from time to time and I feel embarrased. My mom on the other hand would do it at the dinner table. I'm sure I should probably addess that in IC


Let him that would move the world first move himself. - Socrates

Posts: 1030 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Midwest
Bobbi_sue
Member
Member # 10347
Default  Posted: 12:11 PM, May 17th (Friday)

I have a Fart (Whoopie Cushion) app on my phone. My grandkids laugh and laugh about this.

If I accidently let one (I try not to but I'm over 50 and it home with H, maybe I don't try as hard as I once did)...I usually say "It wasn't me." But he knows it was.

The word Fart does not bother me. I don't like the other four letter F word though. I hate how that is used as an adjective for everything such as a bad day or a bad neighbor or bad luck.


Posts: 5760 | Registered: Apr 2006
SisterMilkshake
Member
Member # 30024
Default  Posted: 12:54 PM, May 17th (Friday)

The "F" word was never spoken in my FOO, either of them. We were brought up to be #3's. And, I was.

I thought my husband was a #3 also. He never passed gas whilst he was courting me. Once we moved in together, all bets were off. I was aghast! <see what I did there?

As a mother of 1 girl and 2 boys and wife of a gassy husband, I was way outnumbered. There are a few jokes in our family concerning gas passing and one is that "Mom's don't toot!" (I really try not to!) and the second one is that my dear husband now tells me "I love you!" every time he passes gas.

The "I love you!" started a couple of years ago due to a thread here at SI. We only have 1 son living at home now (17 y.o.) and now he has even started telling me he loves me when he passes gas! I am guaranteed many "I love you's" throughout my day.

[This message edited by SisterMilkshake at 3:07 PM, May 17th (Friday)]


BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson


Posts: 9798 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
Kalleigh
Member
Member # 1214
Default  Posted: 1:38 PM, May 17th (Friday)

I'm sorry but my family passes gas all the time and are not embarrased one bit about it. In fact I think they are proud of it.
My SIL said that we cant have a family gathering without someone passing gas.


I on the other hand try not to in front of others. Sometimes they slip out. While coughing laughing ETC


I love my husband and kids, but there is something missing, LIKE MAYBE A LIFE!!!!!!!

Posts: 6507 | Registered: Mar 2003 | From: Wisconsin
jrc1963
Member
Member # 26531
Default  Posted: 2:04 PM, May 17th (Friday)

The F word was a curse word in my FOO... we didn't say it.

I'm a #3 even at home with DS and FWSO...

If I have to I excuse myself to the bedroom/bathroom.

One time I even went into the garage.

FWSO is a #2 - he isn't gross about it, but he gets embarrassed if DS is around.

DS rarely, if ever, lets one go.


Me: BSO - 46
Him: FWSO - 69
DS - 13
D-Day - 12-11-09,
R - he finally came home
Your life is an Occasion. Rise to it. - Mr. Magorium, "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"

Posts: 24595 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Florida
authenticnow
Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 6:21 PM, May 17th (Friday)

Wow.

This thread is very enlightening. I just assumed everybody farted when they needed to (in their own house of course). Doesn't it give you a stomach ache not to?

Even our dogs fart a lot.

ETA Two words: Dutch oven !!!

[This message edited by authenticnow at 6:26 PM, May 17th (Friday)]


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 38013 | Registered: Sep 2007
Sad in AZ
Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 6:27 PM, May 17th (Friday)

Even our dogs fart a lot

No; if there are dogs around, they are the ONLY ones who fart!

My mastiff, Tiny, used to do it, the turn around to look at her butt like, what the hell was that??


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20284 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
kernel
Member
Member # 27035
Default  Posted: 7:56 PM, May 17th (Friday)

This is one of those topics that just makes me smile and think about how much I love SI. Nothing is too sacred or gross or weird to talk about - it's so fabulous!

That said, I guess I'm a 2-3 depending on where I am. I agree with others here, once you're over 50 it gets a lot harder to be a 3!


"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good."

Posts: 5243 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Midwest
jrc1963
Member
Member # 26531
Default  Posted: 8:53 PM, May 17th (Friday)

My mastiff, Tiny, used to do it, the turn around to look at her butt like, what the hell was that??

Our schnauzer used to yip and run when he farted.

and as long as Quincy was around, no humans in our house ever farted...


Me: BSO - 46
Him: FWSO - 69
DS - 13
D-Day - 12-11-09,
R - he finally came home
Your life is an Occasion. Rise to it. - Mr. Magorium, "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"

Posts: 24595 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Florida
Skan
Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 9:58 PM, May 17th (Friday)

Darn you all. Darn you all to heck. Because I’m sitting here with tears streaming down my eyes, laughing uncontrollably. And in trouble.

Because my FWH calls me Ha-Poot. When I get into a laughing jag, he tickles me and I “poot.” Little lady-like ones. Unlike him, He Of The Spastic Colon who can clear out a room with little effort. Long, ripping, and smelling somewhat of week-old dead cow with a faint overtone of swamp gas.

Unfortunately, a true story.

I was at work one day and the firemen came to inspect the building. And I do mean FIREMEN. Two extremely fit and cute young men and one right about my age, looking lean, fit, and distinguished.

Not that I noticed, of course, because after all, I work in a church!

I walked them around the facility, they did their inspection, and then I needed to go upstairs to my office to get a permit they needed to check. No problem, I said. I bounded up the stairs, two at a time because, well, this old broad was fit too!

Trouble was, at the first bounce, when my foot hit the stair, I farted. Unfortunately, by that time I was in mid-air and, you guessed it, when my foot hit stair #4, I farted again.

12 steps divided by 2 6 farts. Jet propelled, you might say.

I stayed up there as long as I reasonably could, and then descended, 1 stair at a time, with the permit, which they inspected, and we parted company. None of us “quite” looking into each other’s eyes. Oy!


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4926 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
NotDefeatedYet
Member
Member # 33642
Default  Posted: 11:17 PM, May 17th (Friday)

This thread is very enlightening. I just assumed everybody farted when they needed to (in their own house of course). Doesn't it give you a stomach ache not to?

There are only two kinds of people posting in this thread; those who admit to doing it, and those who are lying about it.


"It's a fool that looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart."

Posts: 769 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Texas
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 11:41 PM, May 17th (Friday)

When I was a kid, my younger sister (the devil incarnate) called me a fart. My oh-so-eloquent retort was to yell that she was a farty barty.

Unfortunately, Mom only heard the retort. I was picking Ivory soap out of my teeth for days.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25726 | Registered: Aug 2011
Sad in AZ
Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 5:54 AM, May 18th (Saturday)

My father used to let a loud one rip, then yell "DUCKS!" (It does sound like a duck quacking when you think about it ( )

From that point on, we all yelled DUCKS except my mother who thought the proper response was, "Excuse me"


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20284 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
authenticnow
Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 6:07 AM, May 18th (Saturday)

My father used to let a loud one rip, then yell "DUCKS!"


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 38013 | Registered: Sep 2007
Skan
Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 1:34 PM, May 18th (Saturday)

"Barking Spiders" is what we say.


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4926 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
heartbroken0903
Member
Member # 27879
Default  Posted: 2:39 PM, May 18th (Saturday)

Interesting thread!

I was a #3 growing up, as was my whole family. The (other) F-word was like a curse word...NOT to be said. I remember once when I was little, my dad passed wind in his bedroom. I laughed and asked him, "Did you go to the bathroom in your pants????" He was so embarrassed.

Now I'm closer to #2. I don't do it on purpose, but it slips out more than I'd like and sometimes I'm not in the vicinity of the bathroom when it does.


Me: XWS, 30s, 5-month EA/PA in '09-'10
Husband: XBS, 40s
No kids

Married 2.5 years
D-day 3/6/10
Divorced 5/14/10

Remarried.


Posts: 2227 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: the cat's meow
sad12008
Member
Member # 18179
Default  Posted: 4:36 PM, May 18th (Saturday)

#3 is my natural tendency; I grew up in a pretty formal, emphasis on proper etiquette and refinement family. I may be a black sheep of the family in many, many other ways, but when it comes to that...still a #3. How I wound up with a #1, kids-correct-him H I'll never know. However, knowing how the body betrays us as we age, I'd best try moving toward a #2 mindset...


You can't fill a cup with no bottom.

Posts: 3891 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: a new start together
authenticnow
Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 4:41 PM, May 18th (Saturday)

Funniest preschool teaching moment ever:

I guess in this little girl's house they called them 'putts'. One day at school I heard what I thought was a fart and she looked at me all embarrassed. Apparently she pooped her pants. I asked her, 'B, what happened?' and she says, 'Mommy always tells me, never trust a putt!'


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 38013 | Registered: Sep 2007
idiot85
Member
Member # 38934
Default  Posted: 6:32 PM, May 18th (Saturday)

My 3 year old boy finds them hilarious!!! My daughter's 4 and gets embarrassed- my Mrs laughs and goes 'ooh!" As if it's come as a surprise (blames me in public) I on the other hand... Stinky and proud- the louder the better!!

I 'pumped' quite loudly in a very quiet clothes shop and looked at my wife , shouted her name, shook my head... She didn't talk to me for over an hour but the look on her face- PRICELESS


BH-29 (me)
WW-28

Multi famam, conscientiam, pauci verentur.


Posts: 575 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Old Blighty
circe
Member
Member # 6687
Default  Posted: 7:24 PM, May 18th (Saturday)

From that point on, we all yelled DUCKS except my mother who thought the proper response was, "Excuse me"

For a while I tried to enforce a more decorous "excuse me" response, but DS especially would find creative ways to incorporate it into the noise. Either by shouting "excuse me for faaaaaaarting!!" or "ex!" (fart) "cuse!" (fart) "me!" (farts forever).

Of course DD and DSD think this is high humor and started imitating whenever possible, so that was that.

DD8, hate to admit it, is a champion belcher. She can get to K in the alphabet and can say her first and last name. So she's also taking to actually belching the phrase "excuse me" to take care of it all at once, following DS's lead. Ugh.


Posts: 3193 | Registered: Mar 2005
wannabenormal
Member
Member # 19772
Default  Posted: 12:35 AM, May 20th (Monday)

To add to this ridiculous post - what about pooping? We all do it, but are you open? Are you DTP (down to poop?)

I am not.

I remember when XH and I were dating; there was an instance where we'd eaten out.

At the time, he had a one bed/one bath place and that's where we were after this dinner. I felt a rumble...oh no, this cannot be good. I got another rumble...oh dear!

So I tell XH (then BF) you must drive me to a facility. He's like no way, just go here.

I knew this was not a 'just go here' situation; this was going down in the books fiasco! So in the car we went; the whole time (about a 2 mile away drive) I tried to keep it together. We happened upon a yellow light, I think I said something like, "Floor it motherfucker!". I ran into the place and did my thing.

After, I walked backed to the car calmly and thanked him.

I was telling my GF's that story and they were like you are CRAZY! I was like - no, I wasn't. I truly believe that evening could've been a game changer.

LOL!



Posts: 14389 | Registered: Jun 2008
TrulyReconciled
Member
Member # 3031
Default  Posted: 3:15 PM, May 20th (Monday)

From what I know of the posters in this thread, no replies surprise me, LOL.

Used to have a business partner (older) who was a 'crop duster'.

Don't miss that one bit!!

Me? Few issues and I'm a gentleman. I guess that makes me a 2.5

[This message edited by TrulyReconciled at 3:17 PM, May 20th (Monday)]


"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."

Posts: 21281 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Hell and back, way back :o)
wifehad5
Moderator
Member # 15162
Default  Posted: 3:39 PM, May 20th (Monday)

We happened upon a yellow light, I think I said something like, "Floor it motherfucker!".


FBH - 42
FWW - 43 (BrokenRoad)
2 kids 7&12

The people you do your life with shape the life you live


Posts: 37381 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Michigan
amitheow
Member
Member # 4691
Default  Posted: 9:28 AM, May 22nd (Wednesday)

3 3 3 3 3


Old Timer, Just here to help
My screen name is: Am I The Ow? - Not Ami the OW.

Because in my situation I didn't know if I was the OW at first or if I was being cheated on. Found I was being cheated on.


Posts: 5085 | Registered: Jun 2004 | From: Texas
TrulyReconciled
Member
Member # 3031
Default  Posted: 10:17 AM, May 22nd (Wednesday)

Oh ... sorry


"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."

Posts: 21281 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Hell and back, way back :o)
wannabenormal
Member
Member # 19772
Default  Posted: 10:55 PM, May 22nd (Wednesday)

Truly, thanks for the excusion (is that a new word?!)

That looked like a bad one with the clouds and 'bolts'. Day-um!



Posts: 14389 | Registered: Jun 2008
h0peless
Member
Member # 36697
Default  Posted: 11:13 PM, May 22nd (Wednesday)

I'm somewhere between a 1 and a 2. I'd prefer to do it in private but sometimes a guy just has to let one rip.

My best fart story is as follows: In college, the ex and I took a weekend trip up to Flagstaff, AZ to visit my best friend. Flagstaff is this awesome little college town that sits right around 8,000 feet in elevation and there are all sorts of cool things to do there. We had gone out drinking on Friday night and my stomach was an absolute mess Saturday morning but we decided to stick with our plans for the day and take a tour of the Lowell Observatory.

The tour was really cool. It was neat to actually be able to walk around the telescopes and hear the history behind them. Unfortunately, the further we got, the more bloated I felt. As a courtesy to the group, I did my very best to hold it.

As they tend to do on these sorts of tours, they saved the most historic telescope for last and spend the most time talking about it. The moment of truth happened as I was standing with my (at the time) girlfriend of a year and a half and my best friend in a giant dome with a group of about 15 strangers hearing all about the telescope that was used to discover Pluto. My stomach started to bubble and I knew that there was absolutely nothing I could do.

It came out silently. I was so relieved.

30 seconds later, people start to look really, really uncomfortable. The smell was pretty close to indescribable but suffice it to say, it wasn't pleasant. The ex and my friend, who had to ride with me to the observatory and were acutely aware of my problem started exchanging looks, trying their very best not to laugh. I'm looking around with a disgusted look on my face hoping everyone else will think I'm just as offended as they are. Everyone sort of rushed for the door and the tour guide finished talking about the telescope outside.

Definitely not one of my finer moments.

[This message edited by h0peless at 11:28 PM, May 22nd (Wednesday)]


Posts: 1733 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Baja Arizona
wannabenormal
Member
Member # 19772
Default  Posted: 11:35 PM, May 22nd (Wednesday)

LOL! h0peless; I would've been like you..who? wha? yuck...

hee hee!

It DOES happen to all of us, I just hate when it happens in FRONT of others. Like damn, can't I terribly toot alone?!



Posts: 14389 | Registered: Jun 2008
Hearthache again
Member
Member # 28564
Default  Posted: 12:54 AM, May 23rd (Thursday)

My H is a 0 and the rest of us are about a 1. My 2 year old has found the humor in making farting noises and blaming everyone else. He even does this in public. He also loves whoopee cushions.

My H use to blame the baby when in public. He also works at the nursery at church and has come out after service smiling. I know he was blaming babies for his smells.

I also have a 8 year old boy and at that age they are nothing but fart jokes.

I also grew up in a home that it was funny. My sister and I would always stay up laughing at night if one of us had bad gas. We also loved to have burping contest. Bodily functions are so fun.


Me-BS(32)
Him-WS(35)
Married-12 years together 13
Kids 4: 15, 12, 8, and 3
DDay#1 9-26-2008 Dday#2 4-26-2010
We have R!!! But I still hate the number 26!

This too shall pass
I edit a lot because that stupid box is so small!


Posts: 871 | Registered: May 2010 | From: Michigan
cryingdaily
Member
Member # 7276
Default  Posted: 10:34 AM, May 28th (Tuesday)

I'm a #3 and never admit that I would ever do such a foul thing to begin with. I've been told that it has happened in my sleep, once or twice, but I refuse to believe it without proof.

And I honestly don't understand how people, M or not, can have complete conversations and hang out when one is on the toilet.

Any SO is told up front that I enjoy privacy in the bathroom...no matter what I'm doing. If the door is closed, stay out. Do not come in, knock or even think you can talk to me through the door.

Any violation of that rule is grounds for immediate termination of the R.

IMHO, bodily functions should be kept to oneself. Hell, I even go to the rest room to blow my nose.


Me: BS 48
Him: Doesn't matter any more.
The Royal Court, formerly known as the Princess Posse:
DD31 - Belle
DD23 - Xena
GD10 - Jasmine
GD8 - Ariel
GD Born 9/4/12 - Tink
GS Born 6/23/2014 - Little Prince

Posts: 14400 | Registered: Jun 2005 | From: Massachusetts
idiot85
Member
Member # 38934
Default  Posted: 10:54 AM, May 28th (Tuesday)

How about needing to pee when the Mrs is in the bath- she hates that!!! Or even just not closing the bathroom door- if I'm just peeing I don't bother with the door... that would take far too much effort.

If my wife tells me off for leaving the seat up- I tell her off for leaving it down


BH-29 (me)
WW-28

Multi famam, conscientiam, pauci verentur.


Posts: 575 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Old Blighty
Topic Posts: 47