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User Topic: How would u handle this issue?
idkam
Member
Member # 18375
Default  Posted: 10:37 AM, May 28th (Tuesday)

My dad passed away in 2012 and my step sister (dad married her mom when she was 3 or 4) has his picture as her signature or whatever u call it on FB... Who ghe hell does that? Everytime she posts/comments my dads pic is there... This is so damn disrespectful... Why in the hell would she think this is ok??

Do i ask her to take it down or just block her?? I know if i say something she will run to her mother and im not sure what would happen, maybe nothing but im not sure if i should approach it...

What say you?


People come into your life for a Reason, Season or a Lifetime..
Divorced

Posts: 1774 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Texas
simplydevastated
Member
Member # 25001
Default  Posted: 10:44 AM, May 28th (Tuesday)

I would simply ask her to take it down. Tell her that it hurts you seeing your dad's picture every time she posts. If she has any kind of respect for you she should honor your wishes.

Good Luck.


Me - BS, 39 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS10, DD7
Married, for now... (4+ D-Day - listed in profile.)

Posts: 5832 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: In the darkest depths of hell!
KeepCalm_CarryOn
Member
Member # 33374
Default  Posted: 10:47 AM, May 28th (Tuesday)

Is there a reason? Memorial Day or Father's Day? Is it her and him?

Just curious- why do you think it's disrespectful? (Genuinely just curious)

I sometimes put up a pic of my uncle and I around his birthday or other special occasions to honor or remember him. My parents are still alive so it's not quite the same....if it really bothers you, just have a conversation with her.


You are not dealing with rational people or situations. Normal thought processes won't work...story of my life.

Me- BW, 28
Him- fWh, 34
Mostly R'd, minus a few scars...bought a house and got a puppy...And baby makes 3! She arrived August


Posts: 1988 | Registered: Sep 2011
ajsmom
Member
Member # 17460
Default  Posted: 10:50 AM, May 28th (Tuesday)

Sounds perfectly normal to me.

She lost her stepfather and as a tribute has his photo as her profile picture.

I have many friends that do this when someone they love passes away.

AJ's MOM


Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.

"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
____________________________________________
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
DS - 31 - Yikes!


Posts: 21032 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: Been Through Hell...On My Way Back
idkam
Member
Member # 18375
Default  Posted: 11:22 AM, May 28th (Tuesday)

@Keep calm no my dads birthday was two wks after he passed... She's had this way since his death....why put your father who is deceased on a social media? Her daughter passed away 5 yrs ago and she hasnt posted a birthday or anniversary of her death on FB so why is this so significant??


People come into your life for a Reason, Season or a Lifetime..
Divorced

Posts: 1774 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Texas
GabyBaby
Member
Member # 26928
Default  Posted: 11:38 AM, May 28th (Tuesday)

Its normal to me too.
Your dad has effectively been HER dad since she was 3-4yrs old.

I had a classmate pass away (suddenly) a few months back. His kids and other relatives have been using their favorite pics of him as their profile pics. People grieve and pay tribute in their own ways.

I'd let it go or simply block her if if bothers you.


Me - 42
SorryInSac - WH#2 - 47. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4yrs, together 7yrs total

DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
5 Furkids (3 Dogs, 2 Cats)

WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW)
Legally married 18yrs, together 16.5yrs

Note: I edit often for typos/clarity.


Posts: 6077 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
sullymeishadomi
Member
Member # 16305
Default  Posted: 11:51 AM, May 28th (Tuesday)

I, aleo dont find it strange. Since your father has been her step-dad since she was 3, this is probably her way of paying tribute

I cannot answer why she doesnt put photos of her deceased dd but does of your dad/her step dad. The only thing I can think of is the pain is too great seeing her dd on fb.

If you discuss this with her and she goes and complains to her mother, thats on her. You're adults. Your stepmother cant put you in time out


People tell you exactly who they are...why expect them to be what they are not

Posts: 8210 | Registered: Sep 2007
idkam
Member
Member # 18375
Default  Posted: 12:02 PM, May 28th (Tuesday)

Thanks guys i will leave it alone and probly block her from my FB....


People come into your life for a Reason, Season or a Lifetime..
Divorced

Posts: 1774 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Texas
Dark Inertia
Member
Member # 30727
Default  Posted: 2:07 PM, May 28th (Tuesday)

Yeah, I would consider it normal. I have a few friends who have use pics of their deceased parents as a profile pic. Is their a particular reason why it is offensive to you?


"If I listened earlier, I wouldn't be here. But that's just the trouble with me. I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it."

Posts: 1177 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: The Ohio
aLadypilot
Member
Member # 1822
Default  Posted: 2:25 PM, May 28th (Tuesday)

Sounds like her way of honoring his memory.


Divorced 9/2010
Just married 7/4/13

Posts: 4080 | Registered: Aug 2003 | From: Twin Cities
philly172
Member
Member # 19024
Default  Posted: 6:34 PM, May 28th (Tuesday)

I find it normal.. I frequently make my profile pic either of my parents ( both deceased), my grandma, my Aunt.. I feel it's a way of honoring them

BUT.. I also hate myself in pics so a lot of time my profile pic is my dog & rarely me!


"Sorry" works when a mistake is made, but not when trust is broken. So in life, make mistakes, but never break trust. Because forgiving is easy, but forgetting & trusting again is sometimes impossible

Posts: 4767 | Registered: Apr 2008 | From: Not in Philly.. it's just a screen name :-)
Topic Posts: 11