SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
General
User Topic: can postings here be subpoenoed in court as evidence to a crime?
somanyyears
Member
Member # 26970
Default  Posted: 10:25 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)


..wondering if one's posts here can be used in a court of law to determine motive, pre-meditation to a crime?

..smy


trust no other human- love only your pets
She isn't and never was who I thought..I can't believe who I married and what she did to us.
Me 66
Her 63
Married 41 yrs (together 47)
18 yr LTA with bf


Posts: 4009 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: the sad state of affairs
RyeBread
Member
Member # 37437
Default  Posted: 10:27 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

I'll leave that to the legal experts but I'd imagine anything you post online could be used to at least show a state of mind or something along those lines. You hear about facebook being used for that all the time.

Just a guess though.


Let him that would move the world first move himself. - Socrates

Posts: 956 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Midwest
Kierst13
Member
Member # 39197
Default  Posted: 10:29 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Yes, of course. Anything put here (or anywhere on the 'net) that can be traced to you, can be used in court against you.

I saw a title to a thread in 'investigation forum' that was asking how to hack a FB acct password...yep...illegal.


Story in my profile
He lied, I gave the gift of R
He became the model remorseful WS...all while lying and seeing her
Am I done? Yes I am!

Posts: 346 | Registered: May 2013
Bikingguy
Member
Member # 38103
Default  Posted: 10:29 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

I have wondered the same thing. Therefore I have tried to be very vague about specifics for OM. Now if I do somehow happy to run over him in my truck I am in for a world of problems


Me: BH, 44
Her: WW, 43
D day. January 12, 2013

Posts: 667 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Socal
Deeply Scared
Administrator
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 10:31 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Actually, since this is an annonymous forum, your posts would have to be subpoenaed to prove it was actually *you* posting.

I know in some cases, STBX's have printed out posts from here for their attorney to review, but to my knowledge (and SI has never been subpoenaed) posts have never been used in a court of law.

[This message edited by Deeply Scared at 10:32 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)]


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 191731 | Registered: May 2002
KeepCalm_CarryOn
Member
Member # 33374
Default  Posted: 10:33 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

I was going to say what DS said, they would have to somehow prove it was *you* posting and not someone using your username or something like that. It would be rather difficult.


You are not dealing with rational people or situations. Normal thought processes won't work...story of my life.

Me- BW, 28
Him- fWh, 34
Mostly R'd, minus a few scars...bought a house and got a puppy...And baby makes 3! She arrived August


Posts: 1955 | Registered: Sep 2011
Deeply Scared
Administrator
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 10:34 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Difficult and costly.

We have been threatened many times with STBX's emailing saying they were going to sue SI and take their spouse to the cleaners. Never happens tho, because of the amount of time and money it would cost them on their end.


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 191731 | Registered: May 2002
Kierst13
Member
Member # 39197
Default  Posted: 10:36 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Actually, since this is an annonymous forum, your posts would have to be subpoenaed to prove it was actually *you* posting.
I know in some cases, STBX's have printed out posts from here for their attorney to review, but to my knowledge (and SI has never been subpoenaed) posts have never been used in a court of law.

That is true, but if someone chose to take it that far, it isn't difficult to get the subpoena for the persons info and IP info.

Gaining true anonymity on the internet isn't that easy and using screennames doesn't give much protection if lawyers and the authorities get involved.


Story in my profile
He lied, I gave the gift of R
He became the model remorseful WS...all while lying and seeing her
Am I done? Yes I am!

Posts: 346 | Registered: May 2013
Deeply Scared
Administrator
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 10:37 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

See above


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 191731 | Registered: May 2002
Kierst13
Member
Member # 39197
Default  Posted: 10:40 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Costly, yes. Difficult, not at all.


Story in my profile
He lied, I gave the gift of R
He became the model remorseful WS...all while lying and seeing her
Am I done? Yes I am!

Posts: 346 | Registered: May 2013
Deeply Scared
Administrator
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 10:41 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Well, that's good to know since we've only been doing this for 11 years

I didn't say it couldn't happen, I said it *hasn't* happend.


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 191731 | Registered: May 2002
Tred
Member
Member # 34086
Default  Posted: 10:43 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Difficult and costly.

Just in case, I'll keep the details of the "chocolate ice cream with syrup incident" to myself, thank you .


Married: 16 years (14 @JFO)
D-Day: 11/09/11
"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

Posts: 3278 | Registered: Dec 2011
Deeply Scared
Administrator
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 10:46 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Tred...

We have ways of making you talk


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 191731 | Registered: May 2002
SisterMilkshake
Member
Member # 30024
Default  Posted: 10:46 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

I am also thinking, possibly, they could get a forensic IT guy to go through your computer completely and find everything that you personally have posted. Not being at all computer savvy, I really don't know if that is possible.


BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson


Posts: 8926 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
Deeply Scared
Administrator
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 10:47 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

SM...

I would think thats a very solid option for someone that is willing to spend time and money to get the goods on what was posted here.


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 191731 | Registered: May 2002
Kierst13
Member
Member # 39197
Default  Posted: 10:57 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Well, that's good to know since we've only been doing this for 11 years
I didn't say it couldn't happen, I said it *hasn't* happend.

I didn't dispute that fact and I doubt 95% of attorneys would suggest going that route, but it isn't difficult in the least. It is costly, but it is not difficult.

SM - you're right a forensic IT specialist can find a lot on the computer itself.


Story in my profile
He lied, I gave the gift of R
He became the model remorseful WS...all while lying and seeing her
Am I done? Yes I am!

Posts: 346 | Registered: May 2013
I think I can
Member
Member # 17756
Default  Posted: 11:37 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Gosh I wonder why that's never happened?

"Your honor, I can prove that I Think I Can was very angry and hurt that her husband cheated on her with a stupid slut! I can prove that she consulted with a lawyer to learn her rights about custody, alimony, and retirement funds!"

Oh wait. Never mind.


I'm not the winner, I'm the prize.

Posts: 8714 | Registered: Jan 2008
Nature_Girl
Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 11:44 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

I think there's a valid concern if someone has learned here about how to install keyloggers or use VAR technology. In some states or instances that would be illegal. Then to use that illegally-obtained info might be an additional illegal act.

Or something like that.

But still, there's a whole mess of bother & time & lawyer fees to prove... what?


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 elementary school-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y

Posts: 8721 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
Deeply Scared
Administrator
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 11:45 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 191731 | Registered: May 2002
I think I can
Member
Member # 17756
Default  Posted: 11:46 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Come and get me, copper.


I'm not the winner, I'm the prize.

Posts: 8714 | Registered: Jan 2008
Deeply Scared
Administrator
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 11:48 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Nature Girl...

Exactly. That's why the threats are always empty ones.


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 191731 | Registered: May 2002
Kierst13
Member
Member # 39197
Default  Posted: 11:50 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)

ITIC - I agree - but we look at this through painful, sad eyes of betrayal. We understand why we and other BS get VARs, keyloggers, track phones etc, but to those who haven't been through it, who don't know the pain of betrayal. The Karma bus, hacking email and social media, the posts bleeding out our hearts to those that DO understand...can make us look like crazycakes to those that don't know what we go through.

So for us, it sounds understandable, but not so to everybody.

It could read "your honor my client has been harassed, hacked, and recorded w/o his/her permission. We come today with the safety of the children in mind, we believe Dear BS is not mentally stable. I have XX number of posts from SI proving state of mind over the last XX months/years and the subpoena that proves the name and posts belong to Dear BS."

Now, is it LIKELY to happen, no, but we do need to understand that what we put on the internet is able to be copied and thus never 'goes away'.

We know why we are here and how deeply we hurt. We understand our pain and why we post what we post...but reading some posts w/o the the betrayal filter...not all people understand.


Story in my profile
He lied, I gave the gift of R
He became the model remorseful WS...all while lying and seeing her
Am I done? Yes I am!

Posts: 346 | Registered: May 2013
somanyyears
Member
Member # 26970
Default  Posted: 12:02 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)


..hypothetical, of course..BUT..

..if a member of SI posted that they wanted to assault or 'even worse' an OP, and then later followed through with it, then that could be interpreted as pre-meditation if it were shown to be stated on this forum prior to the actual crime.

..without the posted evidence, it may be seen as an act of passion/ temporary insanity..

..fortunately, in my case, the bfOM is "already dead"..

LUCKY for him!!!

smy


trust no other human- love only your pets
She isn't and never was who I thought..I can't believe who I married and what she did to us.
Me 66
Her 63
Married 41 yrs (together 47)
18 yr LTA with bf


Posts: 4009 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: the sad state of affairs
karmahappens
Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 12:06 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

SMY

Are you still upset about the hockey play-offs? Do you need to talk?

J/K

Interesting question though. I am such an open book, anyone could just come take my stuff....nothing exciting here


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3166 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
somanyyears
Member
Member # 26970
Default  Posted: 12:47 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)


thanks karma.. i needed that little wise-crack!!

..and yes, i'm still not sleeping nights just thinking about those Maple Leafs!! LOL

..and by the way, have you got any really neat stuff i could steal?? you know, good art or priceless antiques??

..all kidding aside, ya, i'm at a very low point mentally.

..i just may have to 'throw in the towel' on this so-called marriage.

..this morning, i called a Realtor to come over for an appraisal tomorrow!!

God help us both.

smy


trust no other human- love only your pets
She isn't and never was who I thought..I can't believe who I married and what she did to us.
Me 66
Her 63
Married 41 yrs (together 47)
18 yr LTA with bf


Posts: 4009 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: the sad state of affairs
Skan
Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 1:03 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

I just want to state for the record, that any musings that I may or may not have made, about the ease of burying a body in the pine barrons of NJ, the alleged properties of quick lime disolving a large, meaty mass, and friends/acquantences/strangers who may or may not have access to a backhoe (oops, I said Ho, SQUIRREL!), were random thoughts, irratic electronic pulses in the brain, and not to be construed as an endorsement for the pine barrons, quick lime, backhoes (I said it again! SQUIRREL), or large meaty masses.

This message has been brought to you by sk, er, FRED, yes, good ole FRED!


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4058 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
Skan
Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 1:03 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

edited for a double post

[This message edited by Skan at 6:15 PM, June 5th, 2013 (Wednesday)]


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4058 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
SoVerySadNow
Member
Member # 36711
Default  Posted: 1:06 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Just MO, but personally, I don't think an attorney would think attaining posts on an anonymous forum would be worth bothering with unless it was a murder case. Even then, it would be a stretch and difficult to get it admitted into evidence. There is aways something more compelling to use.
Again, just my thinking.


Me:BW
Him:WH
D-day(s),after years of TT and Gaslighting was Labor Day Weekend 2012, continuing for a week after. *Dammit! More TT 3/9/13
Really trending toward D- planning about it is my "happy place" now.

Posts: 1256 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Sunny Florida
RyeBread
Member
Member # 37437
Default  Posted: 1:09 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Skan,


Let him that would move the world first move himself. - Socrates

Posts: 956 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Midwest
Missymomma
Member
Member # 36988
Default  Posted: 1:58 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

For murder, sure. For a divorce, I seriously doubt it. The problem would be that if they admitted any of the entries, then all of the entries would be admissible. No divorce attorney is going to tell a cheater to put their infidelity on display. That would make for a really fun divorce hearing!


DDay - 6/15/11
R started - 7/1/11
False Discl- 9/27/12
Real Discl - 2/12/13
Poly - 3/1/13 Pass!
Me - BS (46)
WH - 52 (SA, NA, WA)
Kids: 2 littles and 1 grown
The road to recovery is long and hard. Some days I am up for it and others not!

Posts: 1084 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Texas
gonnabe2016
Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 2:12 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

No divorce attorney is going to tell a cheater to put their infidelity on display. That would make for a really fun divorce hearing

That's what *I* was thinking, too. Can you all imagine if Sultan tried to take my posts into court???? Holy crap. THAT would actually be pretty amusing.
....I wonder why he's never threatened this ......


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OCyL6pa_L4M


Posts: 7223 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
soverybetrayed
Member
Member # 32948
Default  Posted: 2:27 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Actually, my exnpdwh did use my posts as a way to stop me from getting spousal support due to disability. They felt that if I could post here I could work. It didn't matter that the federal government had determined that I am disabled, they knew better. My attorney didn't even put up a fight over the posts being used in the divorce cause he was pissed at something I wrote about him.

The judge read the posts and while it wasn't what he based the spousal support decision on he did deny me any. He claimed I wasn't "permanently" disabled.

Damn "good ole boy" network in Hicksville!


Me-53
DDay 10/16/2010 DDay2 5/22/2011
Divorced 8/23/2012
I will get stronger and better but no matter where he goes, there he is....

Posts: 1192 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Learning who I am again!
refuz2bavictim
Member
Member # 27176
Default  Posted: 2:28 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Did you admit to the anonymous screen name being yours?


BS:ME DDay: 7/18/09 Last of TT 7/11/10
MOW's EA/PA all were my "friends" but one


Posts: 2358 | Registered: Jan 2010
Ascendant
Member
Member # 38303
Default  Posted: 3:03 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

ITIC - I agree - but we look at this through painful, sad eyes of betrayal. We understand why we and other BS get VARs, keyloggers, track phones etc, but to those who haven't been through it, who don't know the pain of betrayal. The Karma bus, hacking email and social media, the posts bleeding out our hearts to those that DO understand...can make us look like crazycakes to those that don't know what we go through.

For sure. I work with ER(aka OM...check BM, pg 26 down in ICR for info on the new acronym)'s roommate and when I told him I was on a support group for infidelity, and that there were cautionary tales regarding revenge beatings, he told ER that I was on "retaliation websites." Lame.


“Anyone who has a continuous smile on his face conceals a toughness that is almost frightening.”

Posts: 1571 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Illinois
aesir
Member
Member # 17210
Default  Posted: 4:10 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

I told him I was on a support group for infidelity, and that there were cautionary tales regarding revenge beatings, he told ER that I was on "retaliation websites." Lame.
Actually awesome. Not like I feel the need to do anything about it, but I rather like the idea of being a shadowy figure of menace in someone specials life.

Just practice safe browsing people. Nothing wrong with incognito mode on SI, or regularly cleaning temp files from your computer. I doubt you have to go so far as an FBI wipe (5 passes of writing ones then zeros over all deleted files on the computer IIRC).

I would be far more concerned about a subpoena for my computer revealing what I posted than someone trying to subpoena records from SI and then trying to link them to me. Of course I am in Canada, so what are the lawyers gonna do? Call the State Department? Extradite DS? Threaten to send poutine in the mail?


Your mileage may vary... in accordance with the prophecy.

Do not back up. Severe tire damage.


Posts: 14924 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Winnipeg
Deeply Scared
Administrator
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 4:12 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Threaten to send poutine in the mail?

I just *knew* you would make me break out my hazmat suit again


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 191731 | Registered: May 2002
alphakitte
Member
Member # 33438
Default  Posted: 7:00 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Damn "good ole boy" network in Hicksville!

Well, yeah. . . Hicksville has their own laws, ya know?


------ Some people are emotional tadpoles. Even if they mature they are just a warty toad. Catt

Posts: 331 | Registered: Sep 2011 | From: 3 klicks north of Ambiguous
soverybetrayed
Member
Member # 32948
Default  Posted: 10:07 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

I have no idea who this "soverybetrayed" is..might be a virus on a computer in the library in Nigeria.

Yup, the laws in Hicksville deem that his posts on a cross dresser website and emails to online ho's are not cheating or deceiving his wife but my posts show I can work even with being classified disabled. Gotta love laws in Hicksville that are "guidelines" for judges to go by not LAWS they need to follow for a ruling.


Me-53
DDay 10/16/2010 DDay2 5/22/2011
Divorced 8/23/2012
I will get stronger and better but no matter where he goes, there he is....

Posts: 1192 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Learning who I am again!
karmahappens
Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 10:10 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

(((SMY)))

I am sorry you are having such a tough time.

Hang in there.


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3166 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
dreamlife
Member
Member # 8142
Default  Posted: 10:22 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

Dear SMY~

We are almost at the same age to remember that cool song:

*Don't worry, be happy*!

(((((huge hugs)))))


~XWH told me what I wanted to hear but he always did whatever he wanted to do~

Posts: 25351 | Registered: Sep 2005
courageous
Member
Member # 34477
Default  Posted: 10:26 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

My ex during false R copied and saved some of my posts. His lawyer attacked me in court with some. Funny how he confidently left out parts of the thread. Also I was being abusive by calling exwh a ft and wanted to sue me for liable. I can't help if ft uh I mean exwh saw a description of a cheating a-hole and thought someone was talking about him. After all no names or city were mentioned.

He also claimed I was mentally unstable. The judge was not amused. Of course I was also going to supposedly get sued for illegally reading ft...uh I mean exwh's email on the phone that was in my name on the account and that he handed to me. Not to mention he also gave me the password to but hey personal injury lawyers as divorce lawyers don't really care about honesty or integrity. That lawyer gave all lawyers a bad name.

And just for the record you know you ae going to win when ft's lawyer tells the judge that the judge added the child support wrong and that she really meant a much lower level (her math wasn't wrong but apparently the judge just hadn't gotten the memo).


Me: BW (35)
Him: ExWH (31) EA/PA with MOW coworker
Married 9 years, 2 small kids
dday 3/12/2011 divorced fall 2012

My ipad does a lot of crazy typos.


Posts: 528 | Registered: Jan 2012
somanyyears
Member
Member # 26970
Default  Posted: 11:12 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)


..gotta thank everyone for the kind and informative takes on the subject.. and for the hugs of support..

..and especially for all the laughs.. it really is good medicine

..so how many of you out there are wondering what the hell 'poutine' is???

..and as for bad lawyers, my bfOM was also my lawyer and used his law firm office for their meetups with my wife.

Howz that for ethics and integrity?? ..not exactly the posterboy for lawyers i would guess!!

@ skan.. have you got a backhoe i can rent? yes, i said hoe!

smy


trust no other human- love only your pets
She isn't and never was who I thought..I can't believe who I married and what she did to us.
Me 66
Her 63
Married 41 yrs (together 47)
18 yr LTA with bf


Posts: 4009 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: the sad state of affairs
karmahappens
Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 11:14 PM, June 5th (Wednesday)

..so how many of you out there are wondering what the hell 'poutine' is???

I would lose my Si username if I told you what I thought it read initially

Hoping things get better smy...


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3166 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
Skan
Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 12:03 AM, June 6th (Thursday)

somanyyears, I can hook you up with my guy manny. He''s THE man for backho, er backhoe work.


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4058 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
seriouslylostit
Member
Member # 23987
Default  Posted: 1:02 AM, June 6th (Thursday)

SMY,

But wouldn't they hafta prove that the substance on the tombstone is actually you know who's brother's you know what?


Posts: 841 | Registered: May 2009
aesir
Member
Member # 17210
Default  Posted: 4:29 AM, June 6th (Thursday)

..so how many of you out there are wondering what the hell 'poutine' is???

Properly, it is a French Canadian side dish often served as a complete meal (which along with Export A "green death" cigarettes explains why Quebec leads the nation in heart disease) consisting of french fries mixed with cheese curds which are then melted by pouring on gravy. The term is now often applied to any combination of fries, cheese, and gravy.

Now here is a little tidbit of California law (only because it was the first US state google showed me):

1563. (a) This article shall not be interpreted to require tender
or payment of more than one witness fee and one mileage fee or other
charge, to a witness or witness' business, unless there is an
agreement to the contrary between the witness and the requesting
party.
(b) All reasonable costs incurred in a civil proceeding by any
witness which is not a party with respect to the production of all or
any part of business records the production of which is requested
pursuant to a subpoena duces tecum may be charged against the party
serving the subpoena duces tecum.
(1) "Reasonable cost," as used in this section, shall include, but
not be limited to, the following specific costs: ten cents ($0.10)
per page for standard reproduction of documents of a size 8 1/2 by 14
inches or less; twenty cents ($0.20) per page for copying of
documents from microfilm; actual costs for the reproduction of
oversize documents or the reproduction of documents requiring special
processing which are made in response to a subpoena; reasonable
clerical costs incurred in locating and making the records available
to be billed at the maximum rate of twenty-four dollars ($24) per
hour per person, computed on the basis of six dollars ($6) per
quarter hour or fraction thereof; actual postage charges; and the
actual cost, if any, charged to the witness by a third person for the
retrieval and return of records held offsite by that third person.
(2) The requesting party, or the requesting party's deposition
officer, shall not be required to pay those costs or any estimate
thereof prior to the time the records are available for delivery
pursuant to the subpoena, but the witness may demand payment of costs
pursuant to this section simultaneous with actual delivery of the
subpoenaed records, and until payment is made, is under no obligation
to deliver the records.

So if you are really afraid all your posts may be subpoenaed, post often, especially to long threads like those in ICR. Firstly it will be of help to others, and secondly I am sure the entire thread should be printed for context. This will lead to an enormous legal bill sorting through everything, and help support SI as well as I am sure that $24 per hour while the printer is running and 20 cents per page will result in some surplus that can go towards site maintenance. Only a fool would subpoena records from DS or Meta.


Your mileage may vary... in accordance with the prophecy.

Do not back up. Severe tire damage.


Posts: 14924 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Winnipeg
numbandnauseous
Member
Member # 34525
Default  Posted: 9:18 PM, June 6th (Thursday)

Is there any way they can subpoena our private communications, like PMs or journal?


BS (me) - 41
WH - 48, EA with HS GF x 2
M: 10 years, T: 20
2 small children
DDay#1 - Christmas 2011 (OW#1)
Confronted - 4/6/12
DDay#2 - July 9, 2012 (OW#2)
He is an SA (Oct 2012)
Divorcing

Posts: 827 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: the other side
Deeply Scared
Administrator
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 9:37 PM, June 6th (Thursday)

Is there any way they can subpoena our private communications, like PMs or journal?

That's a tough one to answer. Again, SI is annonymous but I suppose if someone was *that* serious about exposing a failed relationship to the courts(keep in mind...it would most likely be a WS doing this, so that alone is why it's never happened to SI) they could request a subpoena be brought forth to SI.

Another thing to consider...SI also has an attorney


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 191731 | Registered: May 2002
roughroadahead
Member
Member # 36060
Default  Posted: 10:04 PM, June 6th (Thursday)

I would have guessed it would be more advantageous for a BS to subpoena posts in the wayward forum where the WS admits to sex with the AP. In states where fault affects the settlement, that could be the most financially rewarding use of an SI post. Otherwise, it's a lot of effort for little reward to prove state of mind. Maybe there might be the rare case where someone might post something like "hahaha I have $300k in an offshore bank account I'm not telling the divorce L about!"


BS-Me 30s
WS-Him 30s
D-Day 4/2012 (Insisted EA only)
D-Day 5/2012 (Did I say EA? Ummm..)
Numerous other TT/broken NC d-days until S 1/2013. D settled 11/2013
MOW-coworker, 40s.
2 DS and DD all w/autism

Posts: 707 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: USA
Topic Posts: 49