Hi all, this is Penny. It's been a week or so. My WSH knows I know about his affair through FBook. He has written very little to me and been pretty harsh when I have tried to get more info from him. He wrote to me this morning saying he would like to come next Sunday to talk. I told him this is Father's Day. He said he did not know. This is not a good day to tell your daughter you are leaving your mother and her. He is clearly not thinking. I called him because I needed to know if he was still planning on living in this house with us. He answered and it was hard but I managed to talk to him. He told me he was going to take the boat to a small marina near the Boston area and live on the boat. He said the OW was not going to live on the boat with him. (It would be very difficult). Don't know if I believe him. I just know it will be extremely hard if he tried to stay here with me. He said he was ashamed of what he now knows I read on Facebook and tried to tell me he was just playing around. Did not mean anything. This blows my mind. How do you tell someone your so in love with them, meet and have hot passionate sex 3 times, send her 2 dozen roses for Mother's Day all the while blowing me off pretty much or just nearly speaking to me. They talked about so much stuff and nothing sounded fake to me.
I have seen a attorney 2 actually and I am saving money, getting my car all fixed with new tires and what ever else it needs. This is hard July 1 or 2, 1985 we met and started dating . We were married in 1985.
I have changed ALL my pass words and secured some stuff. I know next Sunday is going to be a very hard Day for both my daughter and myself. Don't know how I will deal with it. I don't know if I want the attorney to file for divorce or if I should just wait to see what he says when he comes home.
I pray every day and night for strength! I need it. Today when he told me he was going to be here next week I started shaking and got sick to my stomach and all the feelings of betrayal came rushing back to me. Please all pray for me to have strength and for God to guide me in the right direction.
I don't know what to do if he tries to tell me he is sorry and wants to stay with me. How can I ever trust him again. On the other hand if he goes I know it will be very hard as well. Worried about all our bills and how I will ever get a home of my own to continue my home preschool and child care business. So glad I put in for vacation July 6-13
. I felt like I was going to vomit this morning. Does anyone have any thing they can share .