SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
New Beginnings
User Topic: Did I mess it up?
APRIL2008
Member
Member # 19690
Default  Posted: 6:00 PM, June 13th (Thursday)

I met a guy while out of town about 2 months ago. He lives 4 hours away.
Everything started out great we would talk/text every day. Then decided to meet up again. I spent a couple of days with him and everything was awesome.
Its been 2 months since we met and the talk/text is still constant not every day but we keep in contact at least every other day. We have been trying to meet up again but things just havent gone our way.
He is not the type of guy to say or text sweet things but he has. Maybe only twice, so I kinda called him out on it.
We were texting and I felt comfortable enough to tell him something.
The text went something like this:
" I would love it if you "spoiled" me a little more. I love when you say all those nice sweet things. It would be so nice to hear it more often"

That was 2 days ago and he has never replied back.
Did I mess it up?
Should I have not said anything at all?


Me BGF28
XBF 29
DD 10
DS 7

“Was it hard?" I ask.
Letting go?"
Not as hard as holding on to something that wasn't real.”
― Lisa Schroeder


Posts: 521 | Registered: May 2008 | From: Arizona
Sad in AZ
Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 7:25 PM, June 13th (Thursday)

Based on your description, it would seem that he was ready for this. You spoke from your heart. My only concern is that text is a bad way to conduct a relationship. So much can be misconstrued. I hope it's just that he's in the hospital in a coma--sorry, hon, I'm kidding but hopefully it's just equipment problems or very busy at work...

How are you??


I promise to surround myself with amazing souls and love them fiercely.

Posts: 19176 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
cayc
Member
Member # 21964
Default  Posted: 10:42 PM, June 13th (Thursday)

It''s hard to build a relationship via text. Even though it feels immediate it''s still asynchronous communication, i.e. it''s one way. Thus it''s easy to miscommunicate & misconstrue.

But I''ll also say that if a person it''s going to reject you over one text, then they aren''t someone you want anyway.

(((April)))


BS 45, WH 38
M 8 years, together 10
Real DDay 10/07/11
Too many OW to count.
D final on 6/21/12
You have to walk away from the past in slow motion as it explodes behind you, like in a John Woo movie.

Posts: 2793 | Registered: Dec 2008 | From: Mexico
Crescita
Member
Member # 32616
Default  Posted: 11:02 AM, June 14th (Friday)

But I'll also say that if a person it's going to reject you over one text, then they aren't someone you want anyway.

Have to agree here. IMO what you said was from the heart and phrased in a fairly positive way. The right guy would be thrilled that you can be so straightforward, and have no qualms stepping up on the niceties a bit.

If you can't be you, like what you like, and be honest about it how is that going to work?

Hope you get some clarity soon, and that life is otherwise treating you well.


Posts: 2970 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: The Valley of the Sun
little turtle
Member
Member # 15584
Default  Posted: 12:14 PM, June 14th (Friday)

Have you called him to see what's going on?


Failure is success if we learn from it.

Posts: 3973 | Registered: Aug 2007 | From: michigan
APRIL2008
Member
Member # 19690
Default  Posted: 1:50 PM, June 14th (Friday)

I got a few texts and a call. and Guess what?? He definetly took into consideration what I asked for. His messages have more meaning they are sweeter and his talk is too.
I am so glad I expressed what I was feeling.
yey!!


Me BGF28
XBF 29
DD 10
DS 7

“Was it hard?" I ask.
Letting go?"
Not as hard as holding on to something that wasn't real.”
― Lisa Schroeder


Posts: 521 | Registered: May 2008 | From: Arizona
Topic Posts: 6