SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
Just Found Out
User Topic: I'm back
roxyl01s
New Member
Member # 25121
Default  Posted: 5:44 PM, June 15th (Saturday)

What fool I am. It's true once a cheater always a cheater. The crazy thing is I'm so numb I don't even care. Don't know what to do. We have 3 boy's the youngest is 6 weeks. I really thought he grew up.Cheating is awful he might as well of taken me on national television and shit on my face. I'm that don't women I would so sorry for.He said sorry yes it was just texting but I'm sorry after the 1st time you cheated on me with a women you had sex with several time.....it's cheating g. I'm dang at least hook me up with a huge ring like Kobe Bryant did when he cheated. I can't keep doing this I'm really thinking I want a divorce.


God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change COURAGE to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Posts: 40 | Registered: Aug 2009 | From: orlando
roxyl01s
New Member
Member # 25121
Default  Posted: 5:46 PM, June 15th (Saturday)

The plus side is I will drop the baby weight faster. Last time he cheated I got down 135 & I am 5"10


God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change COURAGE to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Posts: 40 | Registered: Aug 2009 | From: orlando
de.va.sta.ted
Member
Member # 22922
Default  Posted: 5:47 PM, June 15th (Saturday)

So sorry that you've had to find your way back here through his awful choices.

6 weeks post-partum is hard, do you have any support?

We're here to listen...


Me: BW mid 40's Him: WH mid 50's
D-Day: 2009
There is a crack in everything,
That's how the light gets in...

Posts: 850 | Registered: Feb 2009
Jrazz
Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 5:48 PM, June 15th (Saturday)

I'm so sorry, roxy.

It's probably time to work on that change of gameplan.

(((roxyl01s)))


I bow to those who keep their hearts open when it is most difficult, those who refuse to keep their armor on any longer than they have to, those who recognize the courage at the heart of vulnerability. - Jeff Brown

Posts: 17328 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
roxyl01s
New Member
Member # 25121
Default  Posted: 5:57 PM, June 15th (Saturday)

I have tons of support I'm very lucky my Dad said he will give 38 percent of the company if I come back to work. But really just want to enjoy the summer with my boys. My husband is great father just a shifty husband.


God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change COURAGE to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Posts: 40 | Registered: Aug 2009 | From: orlando
roxyl01s
New Member
Member # 25121
Default  Posted: 6:00 PM, June 15th (Saturday)

I'm just embarrassed to tell anyone. That's I'm here. I didn't give my Dad full details just enough that he wants sit my husband and talk him and maybe take a bat to his head (not that he would really do it)


God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change COURAGE to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Posts: 40 | Registered: Aug 2009 | From: orlando
RockyMtn
Member
Member # 37043
Default  Posted: 8:23 PM, June 15th (Saturday)

Glad you have support. I can understand not wanting to tell people. Take your time.

((roxy))


Me, BS, 30s
Him, WS, 30s, Steppenwolf
Kids: Yep
D-Day 1: September 2011, 6 week EA
D-Day 2: January 2013, discovered EA was a PA; there was another PA in 2010. All TT.
Goal = serenity.

Posts: 667 | Registered: Oct 2012
Jospehine85
Member
Member # 35971
Default  Posted: 8:53 PM, June 15th (Saturday)

(((Roxy101s)))

A friend of mine with 4 boys left her husband after almost 20 years of marriage. When anyone asked her why, she answered "Some people are just not meant to be married to each other". She gave that answer like a broken record. People got the hint and stopped asking.

You owe no one an explanation. Reach out and only tell the people you are looking for support from: your dad, SI, etc.

Concentrate on you and your new baby. Remind yourself to take pictures of your new baby right now. It would be very easy to let that slip as your mind is going to be on other things.


Me - BS 40s
WH - 50s
4 Kids
Dday May 2012

Posts: 852 | Registered: Jun 2012
Getting to Happy
Member
Member # 35200
Default  Posted: 9:02 PM, June 15th (Saturday)

(((Roxy))) I am so sorry that you are back. What a drag!

But-

The plus side is I will drop the baby weight faster. Last time he cheated I got down 135 & I am 5"10

Infidelity is not funny but that^^^is!

Hang in there my dear. Keep posting, we will see you through.


WS him
BS me DD's 26, 25' DS 23
dd1 1-1-10, dd2 Mothers Day 2011, dd3 3-12-12 Hawaii trip with ho-worker...

Never forget what is worth remembering or remember what is best forgotten.
Unknown


Posts: 1140 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: La La Land
Blackhair
Member
Member # 39451
Default  Posted: 9:18 PM, June 15th (Saturday)

Roxy,
Sorry to hear that you are here, but this is a great place to get great support when you re not ready to just D and run.

I am in very similar situation, had 8 months old twin boys, H decided to go online and talked to a Philipine girl, he even flew there twice to meet here. I got so much information and support here.

Take your time, the first few days is the most difficult part, later you will be clear/sure and have the courage to decide what is the best for you and the kids.

Don't forget to enjoy your baby, I know it is hard.

Hang in there!


M: 10 years
DD:5 DS Twin: 2 yrs old
DDay: Earlier 2013, WS flew/met many times with a Philippine girl found online (20 yrs younger)
SA finalized 6 months after DD. divorcing...
I am determined to fly even with broken wings and a broken heart!

Posts: 177 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Canada
roxyl01s
New Member
Member # 25121
Default  Posted: 9:18 PM, June 15th (Saturday)

Thanks for the kind words. It really hasn't hit me yet.


God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change COURAGE to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Posts: 40 | Registered: Aug 2009 | From: orlando
1Faith
Member
Member # 38975
Shocked  Posted: 1:46 PM, June 17th (Monday)

Roxy

You are not a fool. You loved and trusted your husband. That makes you a loving and caring person not a fool.

You have been down this road before so your being numb is completely normal. Of course you are numb. It is also your body's way of shutting off the hurt/trauma.

What were the consequences you gave him last time if he cheated again? Are you prepared to follow through?

He hasn't stopped cheating because he hasn't had to.

You and your boys deserve, honesty, truth and love.

Seek an attorney to get information. Knowledge is power. You don't have to decide right now to stay or go but you need to gather all the information you can.

Look up the 180 and start it now. Take the power back.

YOUR job is to heal you, not worry about saving the marriage or protecting him from your feelings and pain.

Please consider IC.

It is normal to want to rip his heart out, along with other body parts.

For me it was hard to get a sentence going with out a string of curse words I had never ever thought of before! I hated him and loved him all in one second, all the while needing him to hold me as I was disgusted by the sight of him.

I learned this was HIS choice and had NOTHING to do with me, or our marriage. My husband simply chose to escape his personal problems in fantasy land. It was ANY body, she was not important. What was important was the excitement of the affair, the belief that he was so irresistible . What he learned was that a woman that would sleep with a married man, would sleep with ANY man.

I am sorry for you and hope you will take care of yourself and your children.

Give yourself time to breathe and know that we are all here to support you.

Good luck. You can make it.


"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it." - Maya Angelou

Posts: 1143 | Registered: Apr 2013
Topic Posts: 12