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Divorce/Separation
User Topic: Are they setting me up?
Must Survive
Member
Member # 34533
Default  Posted: 1:30 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)

I am getting paranoid. The same day that STBXH lawyer sent a letter to my lawyer and in it requesting more time with DS(I supposedly am keeping him from seeing his dad) OW#3 removed her timeline posts about being engaged (no mention of STBXH name) and all photos of STBXH, including her profile pic which shows them together with her engagement ring.

The state that I am in, can't sue for anything but irreconcilable differences so its not like it would matter to the judge (I don't think). But would it matter regarding child custody. I don't think so. Just starting to get worried if I am being set up for something regarding making STBXH look good and me look bad in front of courts.


Me BS
WS: Just a squished bug on the window of my life!
Divorcing, STBXH is engaged/living with OW#3

They have a choice: they can live in my new world, or they can die in their old one." Daenerys Targaryen


Posts: 778 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Must Survive
Nature_Girl
Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 2:39 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)

My thoughts are in line with your thoughts.


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y

Posts: 9814 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
Take2
Member
Member # 23890
Default  Posted: 2:42 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)

Yeah... maybe. But if I'm not mistaken: your son is 16, doesn't want to go to his Dad's that often...right? So I don't see where you've got a problem even if they are plotting. Now if that start wooing you son - Disney Dadding it, buying him a car, suggesting he move in with them... I'd say he is working on eliminating CS.


"We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." Joseph Campbell...So, If fear was not a factor - what would you do?

Posts: 4127 | Registered: May 2009 | From: New England
Bravenewgirl
Member
Member # 36267
Default  Posted: 2:59 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)

Is it possible that there is trouble in unicorn fart land?

Maybe they got un-engaged.

Having only experience with my OW, I know if WH had proposed she would be flying a airplane and skywriting it over my house every day. Or leading a marching band up and down my street.

There is no way she would keep it quiet if she could use it to hurt me, or to justify their lurrrve.


Don't come around here no more
-Tom Petty

Posts: 661 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Canada
ButterflyGirl
Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 3:05 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)

I'm a little confused what you think they could be plotting against you..

Sounds like there is trouble in paradise, so he's starting to wake up and reach out to people since things are falling apart with OW#3.. Your post yesterday is making more sense now actually given the new information about OW..

And of course he isn't just reaching out to his son because he wants to work on things and repair the relationship. He's going through the courts and trying to cause a fight with you because he's in a pissed off mood and things must be your fault since they are never his..


xBW~ 35
Two DS~ 7-Eleven
"I've wiped the shit off. It can be wiped off you know." ~ Stolen from asurvivor

Posts: 2298 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
Crescita
Member
Member # 32616
Default  Posted: 3:19 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)

Is it possible that there is trouble in unicorn fart land?

My thinking as well.


Posts: 3441 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: The Valley of the Sun
Must Survive
Member
Member # 34533
Default  Posted: 5:48 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)

I hadn't thought about unicorn problems. But now I am wondering if she is putting the squeeze on him to finish the divorce so they can get married. I know she told friends of ours that no man was going to live with her unless she had a ring on her finger. Maybe she is showing "that she means business" and if he doesn't hurry up, someone else will snap her right up!


Me BS
WS: Just a squished bug on the window of my life!
Divorcing, STBXH is engaged/living with OW#3

They have a choice: they can live in my new world, or they can die in their old one." Daenerys Targaryen


Posts: 778 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Must Survive
ButterflyGirl
Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 6:01 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)

Don't you think she already put the squeeze on him and he didn't do what she wanted?

When you say she deleted him totally off her facebook, her engagement announcement, changed her profile pic from the one with them together, doesn't that mean she already dumped him? Of course they could get back together, but I don't see why she would do that unless they were done for now.. I certainly don't think she would do it for any reason as a setup regarding your son or visitation..

I think he lost OW3, and that's why he's making a stink about wanting to see his son again.. If things were still fine in unicorn land, I don't think he would have sent the lawyer letter in the first place..


xBW~ 35
Two DS~ 7-Eleven
"I've wiped the shit off. It can be wiped off you know." ~ Stolen from asurvivor

Posts: 2298 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
Ashland13
Member
Member # 38378
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)

I agree with the thought on trouble in fart land, but also wonder if this is a possible route to the underground?

FB is a place that's not always our friend, too, because of the way people use names other than their own.

FWIW, Perv makes a lot of trouble with his visits with DD and what I'm seeing is if I am upset enough by something with it to tell L, generally something happens with Perv telling his L almost like a race.

He is dictating the visits even though they are planned-he isn't following the times that are set up and were fought over to get where they are and hours with lawyers and money. Anyway...one of the times was a big deal of a way off schedule and I mentioned this to L. Before L could even react, a letter came from Perv's L saying "please make sure your client is more cooperative next father's visit."

Do we let them walk all over us?


Ashland 13

A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess

Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.

-George Washington


Posts: 2287 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: New England
Must Survive
Member
Member # 34533
Default  Posted: 8:29 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)

Now (and I know that I am NC, which mean NC) I wonder if he is still living with her. They have been living together for over a year. The bad side of me hopes he is having to find a new place to live (which means who the next live in girlfriend "fiance" will be). He's never lived by himself! The other side of me just hopes if there is trouble in paradise, it doesn't effect the forward movement of my divorce.


Me BS
WS: Just a squished bug on the window of my life!
Divorcing, STBXH is engaged/living with OW#3

They have a choice: they can live in my new world, or they can die in their old one." Daenerys Targaryen


Posts: 778 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Must Survive
Must Survive
Member
Member # 34533
Default  Posted: 8:33 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)

Ashland,

For me, I just get mad because I know he is busy telling anyone who listens that I am keeping his son away from him. People who know me won't believe him, but for those that don't know me. They could. And I know we should care but we do.
And I hate that we have to worry about how we respond to the crap they dish out, because of the legal process or trying to take the high road due to the kids.

At least I only have 2 more years to go.


Me BS
WS: Just a squished bug on the window of my life!
Divorcing, STBXH is engaged/living with OW#3

They have a choice: they can live in my new world, or they can die in their old one." Daenerys Targaryen


Posts: 778 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Must Survive
tryingagain74
Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 8:45 PM, June 18th (Tuesday)

I'm with the others. One of the blessings in disguise that exists when the AP is in the picture is that the XWS is happily distracted by him/her. While hearing about them prancing around in Unicorn Skittle Fart Land can certainly be painful, the upside is that they are into each other and often happy to put other relationships on the back burner. But when their luurrrrve takes a nosedive? Uh oh! Time to scramble and see what friends/family are still around to serve their neediness! Unfortunately, this is where children get manipulated because the XWS fears being alone and now wants more time with them. I think that your STBXH is doing The Scramble right now because he and the OW are on the outs.

I'm so glad that your DS isn't really little. You're so lucky to only have two years left of this nonsense!


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3620 | Registered: Oct 2011
Topic Posts: 12