SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
Divorce/Separation
User Topic: There's no room for him
suckstobeme
Member
Member # 30853
Default  Posted: 8:31 PM, June 22nd (Saturday)

Exwh I mean.

I was driving in my car today and that song from the Disney Tarzan movie came on - "you'll be in my heart.". The whole thing is about how there will always be a connection even without physically being in each other's lives.

It made me think. I have lots of people in my life who I don't see often, but they will always hold a special place in my heart for one reason or another. Many of these people came running when the world exploded. They talked to me, checked on me and made me laugh. They are not with me in my every day life but I know they are there if I need them and vice versa.

The strangest thing is that my ex husband is not on that list. He holds no place in my heart anymore. I was married to him for fifteen years and we share children, but my heart is totally closed to him. I find that so strange. It won't change though. Nothing will ever change the things he did and said to be sure that I never wanted him as part of my life or heart again.

Strangely, it doesn't make me sad today. It just makes me shake my head.


BW - me
ExWH - "that one"
D - 2011
You get what you put in, and people get what they deserve.
Hard as it may be, try to never give the OP any of your power or head space.

Posts: 2706 | Registered: Jan 2011
MyReturn2Me
Member
Member # 34352
Default  Posted: 9:04 PM, June 22nd (Saturday)

I hear you and I am right there with you, even on the strange feeling. Not an empty feeling, just a strange one......

You're healing and growing.


Me: BS 51 and Freaking AWESOME!
Him: Who the fuck cares........

Posts: 259 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: Puget Sound
tryingagain74
Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 9:15 PM, June 22nd (Saturday)

I know-- it's almost surreal. I feel like the life I had with XWH belonged to someone else. If we didn't have children together, I wouldn't know what he was doing, nor would I care. It's totally bizarre.


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3537 | Registered: Oct 2011
SBB
Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 5:01 AM, June 23rd (Sunday)

We have a dinner table with 4 seats. During dinners the girls play a game called "Whose Seat is That?" and they go through the list of all of my family and friends.

It makes me smile all over. Pre-DD I doubt they knew a single one of my friends. I was so shut down I shut everybody out lest they saw my misery and shame.

Absolutely zero room for him. He has not been mentioned once as a potential owner of that seat.

[This message edited by StrongButBroken at 6:57 AM, June 23rd (Sunday)]


Buzz- The word you are searching for is 'Space-Ranger.'
Woody- The word I'm searching for, I can't say, because there are Pre-school toys here.

Posts: 5440 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Williesmom
Member
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 5:47 AM, June 23rd (Sunday)

Yeah. My wxh is just someone that I used to know.


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7430 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
sheila0304
Member
Member # 25041
Default  Posted: 7:30 AM, June 23rd (Sunday)

I'm there too. And it's a wonderful place to be. The heartache is gone. Yay!!!

Posts: 1170 | Registered: Aug 2009
Topic Posts: 6