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Reconciliation
User Topic: And now... An Std... Will it ever end?
thebirdcage
New Member
Member # 39274
Default  Posted: 11:07 PM, June 23rd (Sunday)

Short run down:

-Lost our first baby in March
-Dday April (sex twice with his ex gf)
-Have some hysterical bonding a few weeks after dday
-Decide to R around the same time
-Have been in MC and IC since two weeks after dday and R is going well
- find out I am pregnant again (high risk pregnancy due to disorder I found out I had after the loss of my son) and am currently 9 weeks

I got an STD test right after dday and was all clear. He just got his results this week and has herpes. I asked for everything during my and test but am not afraid that the herpes wasnt included. I want to continue R and we have a baby on the way. I am going to call my doctor first thing tomorrow morning to get retested. My main concern now is passing the herpes to my baby and I read some scary things about if you contract it in your first trimester the baby can contract it in utero. The odds are very low of that happening but after what I've been through I don't consider myself the exception. If its out there, it will happen to me. Also- if I do t have it. How do I continue a sexual relationship with him, who does have it. He's just totally beating himself up about this- seeing the full scope of the consequences of an incredibly stupid decision and how one moment can change and ruin so many things.

Has anyone been through this?? Any advice?


Posts: 30 | Registered: May 2013
Knowing
Member
Member # 37044
Default  Posted: 4:22 AM, June 24th (Monday)

I hope everything turns out ok for you. Be sure to look into the herpes testing. From what I remember it''s only really possible to be diagnosed while in an outbreak, and the initial outbreak happens several days to a few weeks after exposure.


Me: BW, Him: fWH
Together 12 years
My EA (?) 2005-2011
His STA/PA: D-day: 19/09/12
TT: 08/12/12

We are in R.


Posts: 698 | Registered: Oct 2012
SoVerySadNow
Member
Member # 36711
Default  Posted: 9:38 AM, June 24th (Monday)

I'm sorry that you are now dealing with this possibility. Ugh, the unforeseen consequences of affairs-

[This message edited by SoVerySadNow at 9:39 AM, June 24th (Monday)]


Me:BW
Him:WH
D-day(s),after years of TT and Gaslighting was Labor Day Weekend 2012, continuing for a week after. *Dammit! More TT 3/9/13
Really trending toward D- planning about it is my "happy place" now.

Posts: 1292 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Sunny Florida
painpaingoaway
Member
Member # 27196
Default  Posted: 9:48 AM, June 24th (Monday)

I'm so sorry Hun. I bumped up our STD thread down in I CAN RELATE for you. Hopefully you can get some answers there.

He's just totally beating himself up about this
Good! He needs to be.

Let us know what you Dr says about this.

I'm so sorry.


me BS female 56/him WS 59
Married 33 years
D-day July 09/he gave me his slut's STD
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

Posts: 7102 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South
Topic Posts: 4