I'm not following what happened with your WH exactly. Did he break NC? If that's the case, then any details are going to bother you a LOT more than someone who is simply discovering, for lack of a better word, minutiae that hadn't been discussed for one reason or another. If he's been in touch with OW - then all sorts of things you discover are going to feel painful because he sent you backwards a whole lotta steps.
Do you lose it all over again on FWS or do you chalk it up under the big umbrella of stuff you
were supposed to forgive??
It really depends on how I am feeling and less on the detail. If I'm in a strong frame of mind, feeling healthy, then it would fall under the umbrella, I guess. If I'm feeling under the weather or upset or sad, then it would trigger me like hell.
Basically, I reserve the right to lose my shit if I feel like it or be cool as a cucumber. that's the deal. I try not to be overly disrespectful to WH, but I will vent the truth.
But - I don't often go digging for stuff anymore. Haven't in months. I'm over it. Boring, and a happiness suck.