SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
New Beginnings
User Topic: Rebound or not.
Sue1964
Member
Member # 37057
Default  Posted: 9:21 PM, July 18th (Thursday)

How do you know if your next relationship is on the rebound from ex?

Posts: 287 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: Uk
phmh
Member
Member # 34146
Default  Posted: 9:27 PM, July 18th (Thursday)

Do you mean if you're not ready to date so he's your rebound relationship OR that he's not ready to date so you're the rebound relationship?


Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!

Married: 11 years, no kids

The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark. -Michelangelo


Posts: 3318 | Registered: Dec 2011
persevere
Member
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 10:59 PM, July 18th (Thursday)

Here's a good article: http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/rebound-relationships-in-a-nutshell-transitionals-buffers-why-you-should-step-away-from-the-light-when-theyre-not-over-their-ex/

Search "rebound relationship" on baggagereclaim.com and there are quite a few.


Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling


Posts: 4471 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
persevere
Member
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 12:35 AM, July 19th (Friday)

Btw I am familiar with this because I dated a guy for 8 months only divorced for 5 months when we met. Great guy but the article was on point - it was just too soon for him. So it's good you're interested in learning more about it if you have any concern.


Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling


Posts: 4471 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
foreverempty
Member
Member # 34426
Default  Posted: 1:56 AM, July 19th (Friday)

Ah crap....

Think I've just read an article written entirely about me!

Thanks Persevere.

Took me a long time to recognize theat I was a "transitional" but my behaviours with now exSO look almost carbon copied.

I split up with her just over 2 weeks ago now but I just couldn't comit to her as although I'm over being with my exWW I'm not over the life I had with her and still miss/dream/compare/ask mutual friends about/still talk about her.....

I've bought a puppy now so I won't be looking to be a transitional with anyone again. Hopefully ill stay strong enough to stay single!


Me BS: 35
Her WW: 34
D Day 5th December 2011
Current status: Filled for divorce 23rd Jan 2012. Response from WW was not to beg for forgiveness, but deleting me from Facebook.

Posts: 607 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: United Kingdom
newnormal
Member
Member # 21925
Default  Posted: 7:54 AM, July 19th (Friday)

Awesome article!

Im afraid I might be terminally unavailable. Im 0/2 with picking WH. 3 years of IC, 6 years post dday. As I approach D and think about dipping my toe in the dating pool, Im concerned. I want a companion, someone to do stuff with, but I don't want to get married again.

How do you know when you are ready? And if not, how do you know what you need to work on?


BS 43 (me)
FWH 48
D-day 9/07

Dont retreat, reload.
"Pull that knife out of your back - and sever the fuel line to that bus you got thrown under" Bufffalo


Posts: 1033 | Registered: Dec 2008
Topic Posts: 6