How can she do this to me?
I say this as gently as possible: the same way you could cheat on her with at least 6 OW in 5 years.
You ambushed her. Betrayed her trust. Betrayal FUCKING HURTS. She is protecting herself from the trauma that YOU (NOT OW) have inflicted on her.
My marriage is over- no confrontation, nothing! I was prepared to face my wife: prepared for anger, tears, screaming! But not this.
Sounds like you were ready to charm her back into the M with your words. If your M is over, it is YOU that killed it. That is the hard fact that you will have to come to accept.
What the fuck is going on?
When you throw a bomb into a crowded marketplace, you can't control whatever damage occurs. This time, the damage is hitting you. I know it's not exactly what you planned, but that's what the fuck is going on.
What do I do? Why won't she talk to me? How do I contact her?
You will probably get conflicting advice here. You might consider sending an email or letter. If you do that, I would make it VERY short, along the lines of 'I understand. Please know that I am here for you at any time if you decide you want to talk. As per your request, I will initiate no further contact.'
The next thing you do - whether you contact her or not - is to get yourself into IC and start working on YOURSELF. Become the man you believe your wife deserves. Figure out WHY you turn to cheating. The real, deep down why, not the superficial why.
Stop all A's. Go NC with ALL OW, starting RIGHT THIS INSTANT.
Start doing all the things that you would do as a REMORSEFUL WS, even though it seems your BW is out of the picture. Who knows, she might change her mind later if you prove that you are stepping up and doing what it takes. And even if not, you will still become a healthy partner for any future relationship.
How can she walk out on me without even looking at me?
As you yourself imply in your user name, what you have done might be Unforgivable by your BW. I don't know if she has ever been cheated on before, but either she has and doesn't feel like another ride at this particular rodeo, or she hasn't and she knows herself well enough to know she cannot tolerate it and is doing everything she can to keep herself (emotionally) safe from you.
I also notice that most of this post is all about you. How this reaction of your BW is so unfair to you. You want to talk to her but she won't let you. How what you did might be terrible, but how could she do this to you.
That is NOT remorse.
Did you ever stop to think that maybe how you feel now is how your BW felt to learn you are cheating? Maybe you will start to have a little more compassion about what you are putting HER through.
I'm sorry that you are going through this, and I understand that you are in pain. But I also completely understand your BW's reaction. If I didn't have 3 children with my WH, it's what I would have liked to do myself.
If you are to have ANY chance of getting your M back (it might already be too late though), you need to match your ACTIONS to your WORDS. Don't just SAY you want your M back, SHOW IT.
When you find TRUE REMORSE, as opposed to the 'Oh I wish this weren't happening to me' kind of REGRET, then you will find it easier to work to fix the broken parts inside of you.
You said yourself in your other post that your BW deserves better. Be better.