User Topic: Every BS should go running if they can!
Member # 39588
Default  Posted: 8:06 AM, August 10th (Saturday)

Absolutely NO exercise has helped me like running. It clears my head and brightens my whole day no matter what kind of mood I wake up in. The sense of accomplishment is amazing too - I started at a couple miles (I am a former runner) and ran 4 today - and seeing my time improve is fun too. I just crank Pink and Kelly Clarkson and go, it is truly something I think every BS should at least try if they are physically able. It isn't for everyone but you never know until you try! :)

[This message edited by PrincessPeach06 at 8:15 AM, August 10th (Saturday)]

Me (BS): 35
Him (fWS): 36
Married 16 years 6 kids ages 15-6
DDay #1 (EA) July '08
DDay #2 (EA/ONS- different OW) May 15, 2013

Finally this is R 8/14/13

"Forgiving is a journey; the deeper the wound, the longer the journey".

Posts: 299 | Registered: Jun 2013
Member # 39588
Default  Posted: 8:10 AM, August 10th (Saturday)

That should be BS!!!! LOL. Maybe WS's too - I wish mine would. :)

Me (BS): 35
Him (fWS): 36
Married 16 years 6 kids ages 15-6
DDay #1 (EA) July '08
DDay #2 (EA/ONS- different OW) May 15, 2013

Finally this is R 8/14/13

"Forgiving is a journey; the deeper the wound, the longer the journey".

Posts: 299 | Registered: Jun 2013
Member # 10468
Default  Posted: 8:20 AM, August 10th (Saturday)

Reading the thread title I thought you were on the hunt for every ws and they should run from you

Ddays 2004 & 2007
I cut my losses mid 2013
Feeling happier every day :)

Posts: 6133 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Florida
Member # 39588
Default  Posted: 8:22 AM, August 10th (Saturday)

LOL! Sorry about that - I always think "wounded spouse" for some reason and can't get that out of my head. I tried to change the title but can't. :)

Me (BS): 35
Him (fWS): 36
Married 16 years 6 kids ages 15-6
DDay #1 (EA) July '08
DDay #2 (EA/ONS- different OW) May 15, 2013

Finally this is R 8/14/13

"Forgiving is a journey; the deeper the wound, the longer the journey".

Posts: 299 | Registered: Jun 2013
Deeply Scared
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 8:24 AM, August 10th (Saturday)

I corrected it for you

"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.

Posts: 198258 | Registered: May 2002
Member # 39588
Default  Posted: 8:30 AM, August 10th (Saturday)

Thank you!

Me (BS): 35
Him (fWS): 36
Married 16 years 6 kids ages 15-6
DDay #1 (EA) July '08
DDay #2 (EA/ONS- different OW) May 15, 2013

Finally this is R 8/14/13

"Forgiving is a journey; the deeper the wound, the longer the journey".

Posts: 299 | Registered: Jun 2013
Member # 34373
Default  Posted: 8:41 AM, August 10th (Saturday)

I used to run daily. I loved it. I hurt my foot and now the Dr. says no more running
I miss it so much and walking just doesn't give me the same payoff. I do advise running for anyone as long as you a physically capable.

Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

Posts: 1777 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: WA
Member # 24786
Default  Posted: 8:46 AM, August 10th (Saturday)

I ran at my best during those awful post Dday times.... 12-15 miles... usually crying but then I thought people would probably think it was due to the exertion and not because I was a BS

Running stopped me killing people!!

BS(Me) FWH(Him) DDay 05.09
A went underground. True R 02.10
I won't let another woman reap the benefit of enjoying the man my H has now become†

Posts: 1583 | Registered: Jul 2009
Member # 31765
Default  Posted: 10:18 AM, August 10th (Saturday)

For those who can't run, I walk fast about 4-5 miles a day at work (20 hours week) and about 1 mile each day additionally outdoors. It absolutely is great. Outdoors lets the brain stuff loose into the sky and there's a million distractions. You can walk any pace that gets your blood moving.

I used to run track my whole younger life, and hiked 7-12 miles on a weekend and then still run after getting home. It is true, if you can run, it is very, very, very good. The endorphins to the brain and body are wonderful.

I do miss it, but the muscles, and ligaments just won't take it at all anymore. Thank God for walking. A major stress buster.

[This message edited by Thinkingtoomuch at 10:20 AM, August 10th (Saturday)]

Posts: 817 | Registered: Apr 2011
Member # 35758
Default  Posted: 12:22 PM, August 10th (Saturday)

Oh my gosh! I agree!

I just did a couch to 5k plan and ran my first 5k. I have signed up for a few more as well this fall. My goal is a half next spring.

I feel so great and people tell me I look great too!

Me BS 42 Him WS 44
OW Coworker DDay April 7, 2012
EA on a slippery slope...

When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves. ~Viktor Frankl

"When you are happy, you can forgive a great deal."

Posts: 1540 | Registered: Jun 2012
Member # 28362
Default  Posted: 12:42 PM, August 10th (Saturday)

I too was a runner and nothing works better at clearing your head. Of course getting or keeping in shape is a side benefit.

I can no longer run and I miss it. If posiible run or walk. If not try some yoga!


Posts: 828 | Registered: Apr 2010
Member # 37154
Default  Posted: 4:27 PM, August 10th (Saturday)

I ran so hard after Dday I got a stress fracture in my foot! And I did it without eating. I kicked my H's ass up our favorite tough mountain hike--I told him I had "righteous zeal". I had so much energy to burn, and being 7 pounds lighter helped.

Slowed done after taking a break to heal the foot and gaining 5 of the pounds back (damn happiness!), but we are getting ready to do our first triathlon of the season tomorrow, so we shall see!

Dday -9/24/2012

Posts: 1748 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: northeast
Member # 39902
Default  Posted: 7:06 PM, August 10th (Saturday)

Exercise diffidently helps me.. A minimum of 60 minutes a day.

Posts: 84 | Registered: Jul 2013
Member # 39669
Default  Posted: 12:16 AM, August 11th (Sunday)

Thinking too much - That sounds like an awesome idea!!

I wish I could benefit from running, but I'm always on the verge of being underweight - dying to exercise but I don't want to look unhealthy!

Wants nothing to do with our daughter
No Contact

Posts: 75 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Newwhere
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 1:45 AM, August 11th (Sunday)

For people that don't have *running* on their brain (like me)....the title of your post has a whole different meaning...

(infidelity, BS, run..... ya get my drift? It made ME laugh this morning...even if no one else noticed it....)

"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.

Posts: 8075 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
Member # 39858
Default  Posted: 6:30 AM, August 11th (Sunday)

I've never enjoyed running very much. I've tried...LAWD KNOWS I'VE TRIED!

But I do love kickboxing.

If you can't run, try a kickboxing class.

In the past 4 weeks, I've kickedboxed the shizz out of my husband's infidelity and his multiple OW.

BW - 42 (Me)
WH - 39 (2 ONS, 6m EA)
Married 13 years, 3 children
DD: 7/13/13
Status: Rugsweeping, I guess.

Posts: 248 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Somewhere Out There
Member # 39801
Default  Posted: 10:01 AM, August 11th (Sunday)

I used to run quite a bit, but I found that sometimes it made me think TOO much about things I didn't want to think about.
Right now I know I am not eating enough to run the way I need to.
Instead, I get on the recumbant bike at the gym and read a good book that has NOTHING to do with infidelity. This way I can get my mind off things and truly escape and get exercise as well.
I am just at a point where this does not overwhelm my every waking moment.
Running is great, walking is great...but sometimes it's just too much to have all that thinking time!

I cannot be responsible for another's personal growth.
DDay#1 of a "cheatillion" 4/1/13
Divorce final 11/04/13

Posts: 452 | Registered: Jul 2013
Member # 39523
Default  Posted: 11:02 AM, August 11th (Sunday)

Put me in the kick boxing category 2. Also zumba for those abs. Love to run, but I've gotta watch my knees.

Posts: 180 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: United States
Member # 39169
Default  Posted: 11:28 AM, August 11th (Sunday)

I was actually in the final weeks of training for a tri when d day happened. In spite of being unable to eat, sleep, or complete a coherent thought, I continued to train. It saved me. Running still does. And biking. But swimming... That's just you and your thoughts and the bottom of pool. I find that difficult sometimes.

40 somethings - me BW after 20 years
D Day April 2013
Divorced November 2013

Be happy with what you have while you work for what you want - Hellen Keller

Posts: 638 | Registered: May 2013
Member # 39560
Default  Posted: 12:13 PM, August 11th (Sunday)

Ran first 5K after DD3 - felt exhausted and awesome all at the same time!

I've run since then along with speed-walking or muscle conditioning nightly, yoga x3 week, strength training classes and am currently searching for local kickboxing classes. perhaps I'll get in touch with my angry side during kickboxing!

Just yesterday I discovered access to a paved bike path that is relatively close to home and I'll be putting my rollerblades to use again too.

due to all my activity and inability to eat much I've lost 25+lbs since June.

feeling good about myself physically. now if only the rest of me could catch up! to say I'm a changed person is certainly an understatement

Me: 45, him: 54
together 18 years
DDay1 March 2013, Dday2 April 27, 2013, Dday3 June 1, 2013
We are in R and trying to make it
Never lose yourself trying to hang onto someone who doesn't care about losing you.

Posts: 252 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Northeast
Member # 31240
Default  Posted: 1:46 PM, August 11th (Sunday)

I'm shocked - shocked! - that the mods have let this thread continue.

Not only is it an over-generalization - it's wrong.

Cycling is way more fun than running, IMO.

See, that 'IMO' makes all the diff....

fBH (me) - 70 (22 in my head), fWW (plainsong) - 65+, Married 45+, together since 1965
DDay - 12/2010
Recovered, not yet fully R'ed
I share my own experience because it's the only experience I know, not because I'm a good model.

Posts: 10345 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: Chicago area
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 1:51 PM, August 11th (Sunday)


yeah...the word doesn't make sense to me...I never got it.

I prefer to meander

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3845 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 4:39 PM, August 11th (Sunday)

I like to say that the rage of infidelity fuels my running. After D-day I got serious about running. With every step I took, I beat the pavement with hatred. Last fall I ran the fastest marathon of my life.
I was severaly underweight all last year...but knew if I didn't run, people were probably going to die.
Now that I'm 9 months out from D being finalized, I'm not running with so much hatred...once in a while...but mostly I run with hope. I run because it symbolizes my freedom. I am a healthy weight now and running faster than I did last year. I am on track to qualify for the Boston Marathon this fall.

"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4683 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
Member # 10866
Default  Posted: 4:45 PM, August 11th (Sunday)

I cannot run after 2 ACL reconstructions and a 3rd in my future, but I did elliptical and stairmaster. 45 -60 minutes of cardio and I feel like a human.

DDays 2006, and then numerous more
Divorced 2012

"In life, unlike chess, the game continues after checkmate." - Asimov
"Be patient and tough; someday this pain will be useful to you." - Ovid

Posts: 15325 | Registered: Jun 2006
Sad in AZ
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 4:47 PM, August 11th (Sunday)

I also read this as run for your life

I've never liked running, but spinning helped me through the worst of the betrayal. It was early in the morning (5:30am), the room was dark, and I could cry if I felt like it--all while spinning my butt off (literally and figuratively )

I no longer have the need to burn off rage, but I've kept up exercising and have kept off most of the weight.

I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20281 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
Member # 39313
Default  Posted: 6:18 PM, August 11th (Sunday)

i went for a run today. About 6 years ago I started running and I ran for over a year. I completed a few 5ks, a 10k, and then in 2009 I ran 3 half marathons.

Then babies and pregnancy keep me from running.

Today I did go out for a 2 mile run. It was slow and painful but felt better than I have in weeks.

Take that skank! ( I also hit the punching bag sometimes too.)

I'm like a vacuum bag
That holds all that old dirt
Remember that time we said we'd be together forever?
Don't hate me, don't regret me, don't ever forget me
Wherever you go, whatever you do, don't say I never loved you

Posts: 361 | Registered: May 2013
Member # 40095
Default  Posted: 7:28 PM, August 11th (Sunday)

I lift weights every other day. I generally only run if someone or something's chasing me

BS: Me
WH: Husband
One daughter - 22 months
Married 11.5 years
2.5 false R's.
Status: Divorcing.
You can't pick up a turd by the clean end. Time to flush the toilet.

Posts: 251 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Somewhere on the Eastern Seaboard
Member # 35848
Default  Posted: 9:49 PM, August 11th (Sunday)

Running also helps clear a hangover.

Let's be honest we have all probably drank more in this period of our life than ever.

For me, I went from one drink a week to one every night in the early days.

Posts: 82 | Registered: Jun 2012
Member # 40075
Default  Posted: 10:06 PM, August 11th (Sunday)

I used to run but since my WS is a marathoner, running is one more thing ruined for me. Bike riding, esp. on outdoor trails, has made up for it. Nothing fuels lifting weights better though than the rage one has toward a WS.

Me: 47; WW: 48
2 DS: 9, 14
DDay: Jan/13
Divorced and Done!--7/13

Posts: 121 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: KS
Member # 34319
Default  Posted: 1:32 AM, August 12th (Monday)

Ran first half marathon in months after d day. I have always run, but also lots of cross training. Running gave me time to clear my thoughts and hear myself. Like another poster said, that can be scary and tough.

When I find myself avoiding journaling, yoga and running, I know I am hiding from a truth that I don't want to live with or am not ready to act upon....

[This message edited by OnAnIsland at 1:32 AM, August 12th (Monday)]

D-day: Christmas 2011
D-day 2: 3/28/2013

Married for over 15 years
2 beautiful boys in elementary school

You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them. Maya Angelou

Posts: 1479 | Registered: Dec 2011
Topic Posts: 30