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Reconciliation
User Topic: A year ago vs today
stillcrying4ever
Member
Member # 38310
Default  Posted: 10:01 AM, August 12th (Monday)

A year ago between Aug.10-15 I found out fwh had taken the A underground. Things were not right and I found out I could locate people on facebook from my phone with their first name and phone number. I found OW with photos of her and my fwh. I knew when the photos were taken. I could piece it together. On Aug. 1st, 2012 OW stated she was in a complicated relationship on FB. I wrote a letter to her employer. She changed her status to single.
I was sick all over again. At that time I was loosing weight at about 1 pound every 3 days. I had gotten down to the weight I was when going into the 7th grade. I was crying all day and sick to my stomach.
My fwh was drinking daily after being sober for 23 years. I did not see any hope for the future.
Fast forward a year. Still pain, anger and some tears (just not all day)
I am at a good weight again. At least I can eat now.
We spend all time we have off together. We have taken dance lessons, camped (in our camper, or tent), bought a new motorcycle. Road over 2000 miles in beautiful places
His drinking has slowed down enormously.
I think we will make it. Wish the bad memories would go away. Hope it will be even better another year down the road.


D Day May 27, 2012



Posts: 186 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: USA
struggling3
Member
Member # 34671
Default  Posted: 10:48 AM, August 12th (Monday)

Sounds like you both are moving nicely down the R road. You know the ups and downs will still come for some time and hopefully diminish sooner than later. Glad for you that the two of you have moved along so well in a year...keep up the good work.


Me - BS 55
H - WS 57/very remorseful and supportive
Kids 28, 25, 22
D-Day 8-5-11
discovered 4 month long EA
R - slow and steady but very optimistic

Posts: 318 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: New Jersey
Rebreather
Member
Member # 30817
Default  Posted: 10:54 AM, August 12th (Monday)

It's a long road, with some switchbacks. But it sounds like you are on your way. Hang in there, year two can be rough as well. Hard to believe, I am sure! But keep layering those good memories over the bad. I've found it helps quite a bit.


Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Recovering.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi

Posts: 6545 | Registered: Jan 2011
Topic Posts: 3