SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
Reconciliation
User Topic: Amazed.
sailorgirl
Member
Member # 38162
Default  Posted: 2:15 PM, August 12th (Monday)

I am feeling awed by my fWH's capacity for growth. He suppressed and denied his horrible childhood for 44 years. Whenever it leaked out of containment, he was paralyzed with pain and fear. Yet, since d-day he has systematically faced the abuse, waded through the muck of it, and addressed the damage it caused inside him.

He is consistently owning what he did, examining the ugliness in his past, and changing his thought patterns. Basically, he is growing up again--the healthy way this time.

Tomorrow, fWH will get up at the crack of dawn and go to his 50th IC session. After d-day, I honestly thought I'd never admire this man again. I was wrong .


Married 14 years, three amazing kids
H had 17 month EA/PA
D-day 1/5/13
Reconcilling

Posts: 787 | Registered: Jan 2013
kickboxer
Member
Member # 39858
Default  Posted: 2:20 PM, August 12th (Monday)

My husband also has a past that needs to be dealt with.

Thank you for this beautiful message of hope. I pray my husband finds the same path to recovery.


BW - 42 (Me)
WH - 39 (2 ONS, 6m EA)
Married 13 years, 3 children
DD: 7/13/13
Status: Rugsweeping, I guess.

Posts: 248 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Somewhere Out There
wifehad5
Moderator
Member # 15162
Default  Posted: 2:21 PM, August 12th (Monday)

It's amazing what can happen when you tear down those walls


FBH - 42
FWW - 43 (BrokenRoad)
2 kids 7&12

The people you do your life with shape the life you live


Posts: 36961 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Michigan
AFrayedKnot
Member
Member # 36622
Default  Posted: 2:52 PM, August 12th (Monday)

Awesome


BS 39
fWS 36 (SurprisinglyOkay)
DD DS
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better.
"Knowing is half the battle"

Posts: 2560 | Registered: Aug 2012
Jrazz
Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 2:56 PM, August 12th (Monday)

That is so wonderful to hear. I'm really happy for you both!


It is better to be slapped with the truth than kissed with a lie. -Russian Proverb

Posts: 17066 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
ifinallyfoundme
Member
Member # 39523
Default  Posted: 2:59 PM, August 12th (Monday)

Recon posters , you are making my day!

Posts: 180 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: United States
StillStanding1
Member
Member # 40144
Default  Posted: 3:06 PM, August 12th (Monday)

Thanks for that awesome message of hope!

Glad it is working out so well for you both. Congratulations!

I hope it's contagious!


Me: 40s BS, Him: 40s WH
M 21 yrs - 3 teens
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday = 2/10/13, he moved out, he officially moved back in 1/25/14 and our work continues...

Posts: 656 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: MidWest
Morhurt
Member
Member # 40166
Default  Posted: 6:31 PM, August 12th (Monday)

That is so great!

I feel the same way about my H today.

Mor


Me: BS
Him: FWS
M: 15 years
4 lovely daughters
Working to rebuild.

Posts: 904 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Canada
womaninflux
Member
Member # 39667
Default  Posted: 6:38 PM, August 12th (Monday)

this is exactly what I needed to see today. Thank you!!!


BS - mid-40's
SAWH - mid 40's
Kids - 2 elementary school aged
Getting tons of therapy and trying to "work it out"

Posts: 864 | Registered: Jun 2013
HardenMyHeart
Member
Member # 15902
Default  Posted: 6:39 PM, August 12th (Monday)


Me: BH, Her: FWW - Long Term EA/PA
d-day: June 25, 2007
Married 30 years, Reconciled

Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your emotions.


Posts: 5640 | Registered: Aug 2007
Topic Posts: 10