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User Topic: He's on a damn dating site
Eranda
Member
Member # 6010
Default  Posted: 4:30 AM, August 14th (Wednesday)

I dated him for two YEARS. We lived together for 15 months. He moved out on Saturday, and last night one of my friends saw his profile on a dating site.

Unfuckingbelievable.

The best part? His profile says that he's "new to this" (meaning online dating- which is bullshit, that's how he met ME), that he's "newly divorced and wants to start dating" (he's not even divorced yet!) that he's a social drinker (he drinks like a fish, every single day) and other assorted lies. His age isn't even right.

He moved out on SATURDAY and he's trolling the internet for women already!?! Good Lord, how pathetic. What a lying sack of shit.

God save me from these men who are emotionally retarded, don't know their ass from a hole in the ground, and can't be alone for 5 minutes.

When I met him he had nothing, owned nothing. I gave him a place to live and a life. I thought that mattered to him. Apparently not, all he thinks is important is his stupid grill and drinking his stupid beer.

I'm now convinced I made the right decision when I told him that I wouldn't "date" him after he moved out, like he wanted me to. Because now I know that what he really wanted was someone to sleep with while he looked for someone new.

Fucking asshole.


My Blog: http://allofthewaystohell.com/

Posts: 4228 | Registered: Dec 2004 | From: eastern PA
jjct
Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 5:49 AM, August 14th (Wednesday)

Nice to have confirmation you dodged a bullet.

I just gotta wonder. Who fucks around with mighty Eranda?

A dumbass.

You did all that for him?
The stupid is stunning in that guy.


Posts: 6644 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
Amazonia
Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 5:58 AM, August 14th (Wednesday)

Further confirmation that you are better off without this kind of person in your life. You are seeing clearly who he is.

Now a hard question, how do you know this? Are you trolling yourself?


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13794 | Registered: Jul 2011
cmego
Member
Member # 30346
Default  Posted: 6:29 AM, August 14th (Wednesday)

Yup, my fSO did the exact same thing. He admittedly cannot be alone.

There is nothing you can do but try to learn from the experience and choose someone healthier for your future.


me...BS, 43 years old, 2 small kids
WS, 41, multiple gay affairs
M 15 years, together 17
Divorced

"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings


Posts: 4180 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: South
Too_Trusting
Member
Member # 99
Default  Posted: 7:35 AM, August 14th (Wednesday)

Ama, Eranda said a friend saw him on the dating site.

Now to Eranda: I'm with the others - you dodged a mighty bullet with this jerk. Sounds a LOT like my exH - He had someone new very quickly after D-day and had her pregnant before we even filed for divorce!

Some people are just like that - they can't stand to live in their own skin, so they need someone else to quiet the insecurities in their head.

You are well rid of him because you are simply too strong and AWESOME to put up with the likes of him and those like him.

He's a douche and you made the perfect decision. Doesn't make it hurt less, I know. But, in time you will be oh-so-glad you dumped him right out of your awesome life. He doesn't deserve to share your oxygen.


"Anyone perfect must be lying; anything easy has its cost. Anyone plain can be lovely; anyone loved can be lost." Barenaked Ladies

Posts: 2481 | Registered: Jun 2002 | From: North Carolina
cayc
Member
Member # 21964
Default  Posted: 7:51 AM, August 14th (Wednesday)

Don't be hard on yourself. All you did was be kind, loving, loyal and generous. And he proved unworthy of it. So good riddance to bad rubbish.


"The difference between involvement and commitment is like ham and eggs. The chicken is involved, the pig is committed." -Martina Navratilova
"The question isn't who is going to let me; it's who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

Posts: 3119 | Registered: Dec 2008 | From: Mexico
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 8:03 AM, August 14th (Wednesday)

All you did was be kind, loving, loyal and generous. And he proved unworthy of it.
Amen.

((((Eranda))))


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25699 | Registered: Aug 2011
Eranda
Member
Member # 6010
Default  Posted: 8:37 AM, August 14th (Wednesday)

The worst part? This morning I accidentally get two texts from him that are meant for someone else, and he tries to play it off like they're for his daughter!! Like he texts his 15 year old daughter at 6am?? NOT.

I asked him if he really thought I was that stupid. Told him his behavior was very hurtful and to keep me out of it please. After that... crickets.

Seriously how could I have been so wrong about who this person is?


My Blog: http://allofthewaystohell.com/

Posts: 4228 | Registered: Dec 2004 | From: eastern PA
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 8:50 AM, August 14th (Wednesday)

Seriously how could I have been so wrong about who this person is?
Because he is SO GOOD at projecting himself as the person you wanted him to be.

Wasband is a great pretender too. Still gets me with it, even 18 months post-D.

Don't try this at home, Eranda - leave it to the professionals. (((hugs)))


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25699 | Registered: Aug 2011
Amazonia
Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 9:16 AM, August 14th (Wednesday)

Would it be worth blocking his number? There's no reason you should have to deal with errant texts.


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13794 | Registered: Jul 2011
Housefulloflove
Member
Member # 38458
Default  Posted: 10:35 AM, August 14th (Wednesday)

You dodged a bullet. A stupid, drunken, pathetic, broke and broken bullet.


Me-29 Starting over
ExWH-29 Probable NPD, PA, manchild
3 beautiful young children
DDay 1/20/13 Admits PA
No remorse so NO R. DIVORCED! 9/2013

Posts: 541 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: USA
EvenKeel
Member
Member # 24210
Default  Posted: 3:13 PM, August 14th (Wednesday)

Seriously how could I have been so wrong about who this person is?

I think this should be SI's tagline!

I love when I get verification that I am on the right road (especially if I am struggling or lonely). You are on the right road....keep driving and don't look back.


Eyes are useless if the mind is blind.


Posts: 2175 | Registered: May 2009 | From: Pa
Must Survive
Member
Member # 34533
Default  Posted: 5:15 PM, August 14th (Wednesday)

This is what scares me about the dating scene. I am on OLD, see someone, do I ask for a lie detector test before a date?

I know its men and women, but some of these people are sooo good at looking the part, just almost makes me shake with fear. I don't want another broken boy.


Me BS
WS: Just a squished bug on the window of my life!
Divorcing, STBXH is engaged/living with OW#3

They have a choice: they can live in my new world, or they can die in their old one." Daenerys Targaryen


Posts: 778 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Must Survive
Eranda
Member
Member # 6010
Default  Posted: 8:03 PM, August 14th (Wednesday)

Personally, I have only met one person on a dating site who didn't misrepresent themselves in some way, whether it be age, exact marital status, personality, etc.

And yes, many of the people on online dating are broken- that's why they're there in the first place.

Personally, I would never do it again.


My Blog: http://allofthewaystohell.com/

Posts: 4228 | Registered: Dec 2004 | From: eastern PA
Eranda
Member
Member # 6010
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, August 14th (Wednesday)

I just gotta wonder. Who fucks around with mighty Eranda?

Sorry just had to mention how much this made me laugh :)


My Blog: http://allofthewaystohell.com/

Posts: 4228 | Registered: Dec 2004 | From: eastern PA
InnerLight
Member
Member # 19946
Default  Posted: 9:35 AM, August 15th (Thursday)

Ouch! A standing ovation to you to kicking him out of your home! You sure did the right thing there.

The Mighty Eranda Moves On.


BS, age 53, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years and 20 together. Now I am living alone in the beautiful rural property that was once the dream retreat with X. It's taking a long time to create new dreams but despite some struggles I am mostly happy.

Posts: 5856 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California
BeyondBreaking
Member
Member # 38020
Default  Posted: 5:19 PM, August 16th (Friday)

I'm not going to lie- I would be very tempted to make a fake profile, and get him hooked and interested in a fake woman, and have her stand him up!!!


I have been cheated on by 3 different men, and I have more DDays than anyone ever should. I am here, just trying to pickup the pieces.

At least the current man "only" cyber-cheated.

"Love means never having to say you're sorry."


Posts: 840 | Registered: Jan 2013
clralb
Member
Member # 17185
Default  Posted: 10:56 PM, August 16th (Friday)

Aw, hell. I was separated from ex for two years and we got matched on match.com.

His profile contained nothing but lies.

Just when you think your situation is unique, you find it really isn't.

What dirt bags.


"To keep the body in good health is a duty... otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear."
Buddha

Posts: 681 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: southeast
Eranda
Member
Member # 6010
Default  Posted: 2:32 PM, August 17th (Saturday)

Yeah I would never play games with fake profiles and stuff... just not my style. If he wants to be gone, I let him go.

This is very difficult- knowing that a person who used to tell you how important you were, forgets all about you so easily. I'm sure he's not even looking back, the fucking douche.

Oh well, I just spent the morning putting my yard back the way *I* want it, and cleaning up. This is the first time I've cut the grass myself in a while LOL.

The Mighty Eranda Moves On is right...


My Blog: http://allofthewaystohell.com/

Posts: 4228 | Registered: Dec 2004 | From: eastern PA
burnt_toast
Member
Member # 16891
Default  Posted: 10:02 PM, August 17th (Saturday)

Wow Eranda, Kuddos for dodging this bullet...

(((Eranda)))


It is what it is.

Posts: 4709 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Quelque part
Topic Posts: 20