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Reconciliation
User Topic: 6 years
authenticnow
Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 10:26 PM, August 18th (Sunday)

Tomorrow is 6 years since d-day. Every year I post some reflections on our R, our M, and the progress we've made.

I don't feel like I have a lot to say this year. Life feels normal, quiet, comfortable, happy and right. Nothing memorable to post....sounds good to me!

I asked LD the other day how he is feeling about the upcoming date, if he was triggery this month and he said it's been rough. We talked a little bit.

I've resigned myself to the fact that this will be a rough day for him, there's nothing I can do to make it go away. I'll acknowledge it, tell him I love him and hug him tighter than usual. I'll thank him for sticking with me and for loving me like he does. I'll reassure him that he is safe with me and always will be.

I am so grateful to be on this side of six years. The journey really sucked at the beginning! I'm grateful to be where I am, where we are in this marriage and in life.

I want to thank from the bottom of my heart DS and MH, for this place of support, and everyone who helped us and continues to help us along the way.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37229 | Registered: Sep 2007
5454real
Member
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 10:42 PM, August 18th (Sunday)

Life feels normal, quiet, comfortable, happy and right. Nothing memorable to post....sounds good to me!

Me Too!!!


BH 51, WW 42
DS 23(Mine),SD 21,SS 20(Hers),DS 9 Ours, DGS 3, DGD 1 mo
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 10yrs
I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 2694 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
ThoughtIKnewYa
Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 10:42 PM, August 18th (Sunday)

We're at six years, two months. I'm SO glad to be where we are today.

Congratulations on making it through the storm.


Posts: 11591 | Registered: Mar 2008
Fallen
Member
Member # 4313
Default  Posted: 10:44 PM, August 18th (Sunday)

Congrats to you and LD.


You can't heal what you won't feel.

"There would be no grand absolution, only forgiveness meted out in these precious sips. It would well up from his heart in spoonfuls, and he would feed it to me. And it would be enough."


Posts: 23478 | Registered: May 2004
RidingHealingRd
Member
Member # 33867
Default  Posted: 10:57 PM, August 18th (Sunday)

It is disheartening to read that after 6 years Dday remains a difficult day.

For me Dday year 1 was rough.
Dday year 2 was rough.
I fear that Dday year 3 will be rough.

I hate the idea that 10 years from now Dday will probably be rough. I wonder if this will ever change.

I guess it is indicative of how deeply traumatic infidelity is. The pain and sadness, however slight, is long lasting.

[This message edited by RidingHealingRd at 10:57 PM, August 18th (Sunday)]


ME: 54 BS
HIM: 61 WH
Married: 28 years
D'Day: 10/29/10
in R 3.5 years and it's working but he is putting 200% into it (as he should) to make it right again.

The truth hurts, but I have never seen it cause the pain that lies do.


Posts: 2109 | Registered: Nov 2011
LosferWords
Guide
Member # 30369
Default  Posted: 11:16 PM, August 18th (Sunday)

I'm really grateful to you and LD for sharing your story out here, AN.

I'm glad you are in such a better spot six years out.

What an inspiration. Thank you for the hope.


Posts: 6660 | Registered: Dec 2010
HardenMyHeart
Member
Member # 15902
Default  Posted: 11:24 PM, August 18th (Sunday)

Congrats to you and LD on reaching this huge milestone.


Me: BH, Her: FWW - Long Term EA/PA
d-day: June 25, 2007
Married 30 years, Reconciled

Posts: 5632 | Registered: Aug 2007
AFrayedKnot
Member
Member # 36622
Default  Posted: 7:28 AM, August 19th (Monday)

Congratulations and Thank you for the Hope!!!

You and LD are an inspiration.


BS 39
fWS 36 (SurprisinglyOkay)
DD DS
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better.
"Knowing is half the battle"

Posts: 2560 | Registered: Aug 2012
unfound
Member
Member # 12802
Default  Posted: 7:47 AM, August 19th (Monday)

Life feels normal, quiet, comfortable, happy and right

The two of you have worked really hard to get to where you are. You deserve all the normal happy and right feelings you have today and in the future.


ka-mai
*******************
From time to time, I do consider that I might be mad. Like any self-respecting lunatic, however, I am always quick to dismiss any doubts about my sanity. DK

Posts: 14832 | Registered: Nov 2006 | From: mercury's underboob
forgivingnow
Member
Member # 33549
Default  Posted: 2:40 PM, August 19th (Monday)

"I'll reassure him that he is safe with me and always will be."
You give me hope that when my husband says this to me it is the truth.
Thank you and congratulations to you.


Me-BS 51
FWH-51
M 31 yrs.
Dday 3-19-11, TT 10/2011, Full truth July 2013
Strength comes from within. You can't get it from someone or go somewhere to get it. It is already here, waiting to be used when you need it most. Believe in yourself.
R

Posts: 602 | Registered: Oct 2011
authenticnow
Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 2:59 PM, August 19th (Monday)

Thank you for the responses and support.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37229 | Registered: Sep 2007
jo2love
Moderator
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 3:07 PM, August 19th (Monday)

Congrats to you and LD.

Posts: 34611 | Registered: Mar 2011
Topic Posts: 12