SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
Divorce/Separation
User Topic: I understand now.
copout
Member
Member # 22421
Default  Posted: 7:39 AM, August 20th (Tuesday)

Having been in Law Enforcement I don't believe I ever truly understood the look of fear in a victims eyes.I also didn't understand how far one will go to protect themselves and those they love without caring of consequence.
How you feel when a restraining order does no good.When you constantly are looking over your shoulder.When you can't sleep at night.
I can honestly say that I have been pushed further than I thought I could tolerate.
I'm living this hell at the moment but it's going to be okay.I'll make it through this and learn from it.
Bring it on asshole you're not bringing me down.


Every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end.

Posts: 290 | Registered: Jan 2009
lieshurt
Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 8:22 AM, August 20th (Tuesday)

(((copout)))

I was in the same position after my divorce. I had an RO that my exwh immediately violated. Once I reported it, it took them a whole year to finally arrest him. He stalked me, harassed me, showed up at my house banging on the door, called me 2000 times at work, etc....It got to the point that just hearing a phone ring at work would sometimes cause me to have an anxiety attack.

Most mornings I woke up and had to repeat "I will get through this. I am strong. I will get through this." over and over again.

It's difficult, but remember you aren't alone here. You will get through this.

[This message edited by lieshurt at 8:25 AM, August 20th (Tuesday)]


I'm sorry if you don't like my Honesty, but to be fair I don't like your lies.

Sometimes it's better to push someone away...not because you stopped loving them but because you can't take the pain anymore.


Posts: 13747 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 10:06 AM, August 20th (Tuesday)

((((copout)))) Your post concerns me. Are you safe?


You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams


Posts: 25287 | Registered: Aug 2011
stillstrong
Member
Member # 36144
Default  Posted: 10:21 AM, August 20th (Tuesday)

copout, I've been hoping to see you. I hope you're safe and have lots of law enforcement friends who can help you. Please stay safe


Me BS 47
Him WS 51
DDay LTA Feb 21, 2006
R until DDay 2EA's 1/31/12 ONS 2/5/12 Broken NC 7/12/12
Moved out 9/12
Legally Separated 3/13


Posts: 848 | Registered: Jul 2012
copout
Member
Member # 22421
Default  Posted: 11:49 AM, August 20th (Tuesday)

Yes I'm safe,thanks for asking.
The crap just never ends.
Let's see, the brakes on my car have been tampered with,the police were called to mediation for my protection,he has entered my house several times while I was gone,last week he flashed his badge and the local law enforcement let him back into my house,he leaves strange things in my driveway, he has violated the restraining order nine times that I am aware of.The crap never ends.
At least I'm at a place where I'm not afraid and am no longer going to tolerate this garbage.
Once again I'm safe and life is so much better than it was!



Every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end.

Posts: 290 | Registered: Jan 2009
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 11:52 AM, August 20th (Tuesday)

Lordy. Sending you continued strength, copout.


You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams


Posts: 25287 | Registered: Aug 2011
Tearsoflove
Member
Member # 8271
Default  Posted: 2:52 PM, August 20th (Tuesday)

I was gone,last week he flashed his badge and the local law enforcement let him back into my house,he leaves strange things in my driveway, he has violated the restraining order nine times that I am aware of.

Security cameras? Even if I had to borrow the money I'd have them installed if I were you.


"Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand." ~Homer Simpson


Posts: 4075 | Registered: Sep 2005
Random thoughts
Member
Member # 2959
Default  Posted: 4:36 PM, August 20th (Tuesday)

You should file a report with the police department about letting him into your house, he's not a cop anymore right?

Also contact a lawyer about the cops letting him have access into your home especially with him violating the restraining order 9 times.


Those three words are said too much and not enough.
Chasing Cars-Snow Patrol.
FWW

Posts: 1587 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Some where in New Jersey
copout
Member
Member # 22421
Default  Posted: 7:18 PM, August 20th (Tuesday)

My son installed a security camera before he went back to school.
I don't live in the same county where we both worked,I called the Sheriff's office the other day and explained the situation,never heard back.
My attorney is well aware of all that has been going on.We just keep documenting everything.It's been a year hopefully this will be resolved in the near future.
He left a year ago to live with OW and I have not seen or talked to him since.I don't understand the need for all this crap,he is living the life he wanted.


Every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end.

Posts: 290 | Registered: Jan 2009
caregiver9000
Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 8:40 PM, August 20th (Tuesday)

(((hugs)))

I am so sorry. It does sound like you are doing all the right things. Empowering things.

What about a dog? Not a friendly I like everyone dog either. Maybe a retired K9 dog?


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5808 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
copout
Member
Member # 22421
Default  Posted: 5:53 AM, August 21st (Wednesday)

I have the most wonderful Chow Chow who alerts me the second someone pulls into my driveway.If she is not outside and you make it to the front door she sounds as if she will tear you to pieces.
I do have a gate at the end of the driveway that is now securely locked and needs a key to be opened.
What a way to live.


Every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end.

Posts: 290 | Registered: Jan 2009
Topic Posts: 11