Start by reviewing this site: http://www.nycourts.gov/divorce/forms.shtml
You should be able to get basic information and find out if you can file pro se or if you will need an attorney to file (attorney = $$). I don't live in NY, but this is where I would start if I did.BS - Me
XPOS - too many OW/OCs, started 1994? - never stopped
Kids - 22, 20, 17
M Dissolved 2013!!!
This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man, ~ Shakespeare