SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
Divorce/Separation
User Topic: We both still cry
strawblond30
Member
Member # 6263
Default  Posted: 5:51 PM, August 20th (Tuesday)

Is it normal that I cry hourly and he cries often and we both think we still love each other but need time apart to know for sure?? Is this normal .


Me 39, EX H 40 married 17 years infidelity on both parts . He a serial cheater. I cheated for revenge and ran home to brag. Or make Him mad. He confessed to more affairs after that. We are now divorced living apart . 3 children

Posts: 957 | Registered: Jan 2005 | From: illinois
sparklezombie
Member
Member # 40095
Default  Posted: 7:09 PM, August 20th (Tuesday)

I hope so. Going through something similar here


BS: Me
WH: Husband
One daughter - 22 months
Married 11.5 years
2.5 false R's.
Status: Divorcing.
You can't pick up a turd by the clean end. Time to flush the toilet.

Posts: 253 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Somewhere on the Eastern Seaboard
ladies_first
Member
Member # 24643
Default  Posted: 7:22 PM, August 20th (Tuesday)

strawblond30, Any chance you could update your taglines?

If you are, in fact, officially divorced ... you'll probably get a more honest answer.

Because Divorce is hugely painful, and when we're in pain we cry.

But it sounds like some denial going on if you're focused on time apart, and hoping to get back together, when as recently as the weekend he was out with others.


"We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us." ~J. Campbell
"In the final analysis, it is your own attitude that will make or break you, not what has happened to you." ~D. Galloway

Posts: 2143 | Registered: Jun 2009
strawblond30
Member
Member # 6263
Default  Posted: 9:19 PM, August 20th (Tuesday)

He thinks after time apart we will know if we want each other or others. I can't move on he is dating .


Me 39, EX H 40 married 17 years infidelity on both parts . He a serial cheater. I cheated for revenge and ran home to brag. Or make Him mad. He confessed to more affairs after that. We are now divorced living apart . 3 children

Posts: 957 | Registered: Jan 2005 | From: illinois
Maxiom
Member
Member # 26001
Default  Posted: 9:24 PM, August 20th (Tuesday)

It is normal but I want to caution you reading too much into your STBX or ex's reason for crying? It may be completely different from your own, yet you transfer your own reasons onto him.

Look.. he had many opportunities to be the husband for you. To stop his destructive behavior and work toward a true reconciliation. He did not.

On the information you have provided i suggest he is crying for purely selfish reasons. He liked the way things were when he got his women on the side and you were blissfully unaware of that. That is what he misses. That is what he currently laments.

This is a very disordered individual and you will be much better off without him in your life.



Me: FBS/WS 41
Her FWS/BS 41
My DDay - March 10, 2007 Whole Truth - May 2007
Her DDay - March 2, 2011
True NC March 3, 2011

Posts: 462 | Registered: Oct 2009 | From: Canada
Topic Posts: 5