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Reconciliation
User Topic: Advice please....
FogHater
Member
Member # 33156
Default  Posted: 10:18 AM, August 21st (Wednesday)

Had him served he doesn't want divorce wants to work on our marriage. Honestly didn't think I would be here...I know 3 yrs after dday he doesn't deserve this, but this is something I need to do. He knows I'm serious and not afraid to pull that trigger but I told him if I find myself back here it's over no more chances I'm done!
I'm not sure it will work out...
We r going to counseling
We will see what happens.
We went after dday and didn't tell the truth and didn't seem to want to do what the counselor said.
He lied to her about his relationship with her. Just kissing and touching...
He had sex with her on several occasions.
This time I'm taking the things I found in his truck (took pics of everything)
Found a phone, cialis and cards from her.
Sorry this is long...
If u don't understand something just ask.
Don't have much faith in this working
I just do not want to be hurt again.
I neede to get this out
Thanks for listening..
Advice would be good


I don't know what I'm doing
but I know what I'm not doing

Posts: 1301 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: Illinois
Rebreather
Member
Member # 30817
Default  Posted: 10:24 AM, August 21st (Wednesday)

I'm familiar with your story. And. Well. I was really happy when you finally filed for divorce. He has been utterly unremorseful, continued to lie and cheat for many years after your dday.

Very few waywards actually want divorces. They want to have you and their piece on the side. If you feel you need to try again, I would set the bar for his actions as high as possible. He has to make massive changes in his behavior and thought processes. All the work should be coming from his side. I would make sure he is in IC and I would be very, very careful in MC. Best of luck to you.


Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Recovering.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi

Posts: 6569 | Registered: Jan 2011
OldCow18
Member
Member # 39670
Default  Posted: 10:25 AM, August 21st (Wednesday)

Did you just have another d-day?


Me, BW forty something, DD & DS,
Married to WH (49) 11 years, together 16
D-Day 6.8.13

Posts: 620 | Registered: Jun 2013
ArkLaMiss
Member
Member # 14918
Default  Posted: 10:48 AM, August 21st (Wednesday)

LEAVE. He's shown ZERO remorse. Has he come clean abt everything? If not, then he's not 100% in. Proceed with the divorce and WATCH his actions. You can stop the process at any time, but for now, keep the divorce moving.


Just HOW stupid do you think I am, exactly?

Posts: 1209 | Registered: Jun 2007
ArkLaMiss
Member
Member # 14918
Default  Posted: 2:05 PM, August 23rd (Friday)

Just wanted to check on you, Foghater. How are you?


Just HOW stupid do you think I am, exactly?

Posts: 1209 | Registered: Jun 2007
Topic Posts: 5