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Reconciliation
User Topic: Breaking Bad
LadyYoga
Member
Member # 28611
Default  Posted: 4:00 PM, August 22nd (Thursday)

We just started watching the show. It's hard for me to find anything I Like on TV as it seems everything has an A in it!
Last night, while watching the second season, we started talking about how "human" the show is. The main character has cancer and wants to make money for his family. I said "He makes one bad decision after the other. It just spirals out of control. One human error leads to another human error."
And my H said "that's what I have been telling you for three years" and then reached for me in a loving way.
He said way way back that he was in a bad place at that time and didn't know what to do. He made one bad choice and then it was out of control.

It's like he was a train that got derailed.
As I read the Wayward forum I see a lot of trains derailed. I think there is hope for us all. One way or another. We are all human, we all make mistakes.
I'm just rambling but wanted to share.


BS (me) 39
WH 50
DD,DS,DS
D-day 3/11/10 (3 month EA,1 week PA)
Whore was my best friend

Posts: 700 | Registered: May 2010
Later
Member
Member # 39375
Default  Posted: 4:12 PM, August 22nd (Thursday)

Spoiler alert, but if you are looking for something that does not have infidelity issues BB may not be the best choice.

It's a great series though.


Posts: 384 | Registered: May 2013
LadyYoga
Member
Member # 28611
Default  Posted: 4:14 PM, August 22nd (Thursday)

Great. We just started it. If/when the infidelity hits me hard, I'll go back to watching spongebob with my kids!


BS (me) 39
WH 50
DD,DS,DS
D-day 3/11/10 (3 month EA,1 week PA)
Whore was my best friend

Posts: 700 | Registered: May 2010
doesitgetbetter
Member
Member # 18429
Default  Posted: 4:15 PM, August 22nd (Thursday)

It reminds me of the movie Infidelity with Richard Gere. It's very graphic and very much in your face about the A, so I wouldn't watch if if you aren't far enough out to handle it.

Anyway, the beginning of the movie has the wife getting a cut and a stranger offers her a band aid. A cab pulls up that she had called earlier, and she now has the choice... go up to the strangers apartment, or get in the cab. She waves the cab off and goes up.

The movie then follows her entire A, all the nitty gritty nasty stuff that makes me want to .

The very end of the movie then goes back in time to the moment on the stoop where the cab is there and the guy offers a band aid. He turns to open his door, and she jumps into the cab and waves goodbye and says thank you. That moment, that simple little choice would have changed her life.

It's much easier to cross a line we've defined for ourselves if we simply cross it a little bit at a time. Therein lies the danger of loosey goosey boundaries.


DDay - Dec '07
Me - BS
Him - FWS
Us - Committed
May 18, 2010 - I forgave him fully!
"Behold, I have refined thee, but not with silver; I have chosen thee in the furnace of affliction." Isaiah 48:10

Posts: 3859 | Registered: Feb 2008
BeyondBreaking
Member
Member # 38020
Default  Posted: 4:16 PM, August 22nd (Thursday)

I completely agree, and that is a really good way of explaining it. The first season of breaking bad really illustrates how someone can go from seemingly innocent and having really good intentions (he was just a chemistry teacher with cancer who needed money to afford treatments) and a whole series of bad choices later can leave a very different impression (at the end of the first season he is a full on drug dealer over his head in a mess). His wife senses something is wrong as well, and when he doesn't communicate honestly with her (the show is designed in a way that at first, the view really sympathizes and can understand why he doesn't talk to his wife and try to work with her), and wthen she starts making decisions and bad choices accordingly.

I remember with DD's dad, we talked this a little bit with lying in a counseling session. He had told me a bunch of lies when we first started dating to try and impress me. I can understand that- who doesn't want to appear to have everything all together on their first/second date? When we started officially dating, he had to start telling more lies to cover up the lies he started from the beginning. Before he knew it, things were completely out of control with his lying and even HE got confused.


I have been cheated on by 3 different men, and I have more DDays than anyone ever should. I am here, just trying to pickup the pieces.

At least the current man "only" cyber-cheated.

"Love means never having to say you're sorry."


Posts: 840 | Registered: Jan 2013
IGaveItMyAll
Member
Member # 38622
Default  Posted: 7:25 PM, August 22nd (Thursday)

I watched Breaking Bad for a while with my wife. I hit the infidelity part and turned it off until I was further along in healing. MC helped me with movies etc. encouraged me to not avoid them. He told me it was ok to feel the emotions to process it and heal from. Avoiding it won't help me in the long run. But yeah... I think my WW made bad decisions and it totally spiraled out of control until she woke up without me, without our kids, without her AP and alone in the aftermath of the mess she created. It was sad to see her like that. Rock bottom wasn't fun.


ME-BS 34
FWW-28
M 6 Yrs
DDAY- 8/20/12
R

Posts: 332 | Registered: Mar 2013
Bubbleup
Member
Member # 36120
Default  Posted: 7:03 AM, August 23rd (Friday)

Great show and something I found very interesting regarding the infidelety on the show as the BS...

I knew the moment that Skylar interviewed to returned to work that she would land on her boss at some point where my WS was in suspended disbelief until the moment she asked to go to his place.

In our case it was one of those teachable moments that demonstrates how crossed boundaries left unchecked can lead to what we all know ends up happening.


Me: BS 50
Her: WS 45 NC since 10/29/12
D-Day 1 4-20-2012 D-Day 2 9-7-13
Kids 2: 10yrs, 5yrs
Married 18 years, Together 24 years
Blind to EA for years
EA became PA

Posts: 90 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: NY
JanaGreen
Member
Member # 29341
Default  Posted: 7:24 AM, August 23rd (Friday)

There is some infidelity, but the show is so fracking amazing that it's worth the unpleasantness of watching it.

And yeah, choices. Just watch. Just watch and watch the choices that Walt makes!


We're both in our 30s. One awesome 4-year-old daughter.

Posts: 6568 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Somewhere in the South
DWBH
Member
Member # 35512
Default  Posted: 10:40 AM, August 23rd (Friday)

here is some infidelity, but the show is so fracking amazing that it's worth the unpleasantness of watching it.
And yeah, choices. Just watch. Just watch and watch the choices that Walt makes!

^^^THIS^^^


Me: BH, 43
Her: FWW, 41 (ThornyRose)
M: 16 years, together 19
2 Daughters: 14 and 12
D Day: 9/25/2011; Lies & TT to 5/4/2012
~Double betrayal; caught them in the act~

Posts: 729 | Registered: May 2012 | From: WI
StillGoing
Member
Member # 28571
Default  Posted: 11:22 AM, August 23rd (Friday)

Small steps corrupt and the road the hell is paved with good intentions.

Breaking Bad is a great illustration of that.

Walter White is not and was not a good man and I think the aim of the show was to demonstrate that even when the world is against you and kicking your ass, if you make choices you know are fucked up, they will lead to the inevitable fucked up consequences. Walter White broke, broke early and broke irreparably. Not because he was weak, but because he was looking for a reason to break. Cancer was a painful and fucked up catalyst but it was what he chose to funnel his resentment and anger and solitude into. It was his opportunity, and it was a great one. He has cancer. He knows he is going to die painfully and fuck the world for it.

OTOH Jesse Pinkman made his choices out of ignorance and stupidity and when he actually thinks about shit, he tries to move towards the right choices. Yeah he still gets pissed and does fucked up things but his direction is aimed diametrically opposed to Walter Whites.

I started off cheering Walter but before the first season even ended I was relating to Hank the most. Not just because he's a homebrewer. Maybe relate isn't even the right word. Looking at him as the protagonist of the story, with Walter White as the villain. He is a damn styling villain though. Like a real world drama Lex Luthor with a cool hat instead of a powered exoskeleton.

Walter White was an intelligent, thoughtful man with vast reserves of hatred, anger and despair. The idea that he could make and sell meth to ensure his family was taken care of after his death was the lie he told himself to allow those first few steps down the road to the Dark Side. Yeah. I said it. Walter White is the next Sith Lord. Darth Tractable. Because they were originally naming Sith things that started with In-.

Sorry, thinking out loud again.


“Fate is a fickle bitch who dotes on irony.”

Posts: 7373 | Registered: May 2010 | From: USA
SisterMilkshake
Member
Member # 30024
Default  Posted: 11:35 AM, August 23rd (Friday)

t/j SG~ you are the first person that was able to convince me that I need to watch BB!

momof3gbb ~ thanks for sharing, I do believe that is the case for many WS's. I feel that once my FWH crossed the line to fucking the OW once, he figured what the hell! He was going to be in the same amount of shit whether he fucked OW once or hundred, so it might as well be a hundred.


BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson


Posts: 9423 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
DWBH
Member
Member # 35512
Default  Posted: 12:57 PM, August 23rd (Friday)

SG, that is a great analysis/synopsis of the show... never viewed Hank as the hero, and Walt as the villain though. It wasn't until season 5 that I started thinking what a fucker Walt is... but still find myself cheering for him, in some strange voyeuristic way. The transformation of his character is just so awesomely portrayed throughout the series.


Me: BH, 43
Her: FWW, 41 (ThornyRose)
M: 16 years, together 19
2 Daughters: 14 and 12
D Day: 9/25/2011; Lies & TT to 5/4/2012
~Double betrayal; caught them in the act~

Posts: 729 | Registered: May 2012 | From: WI
Topic Posts: 12