I can completely relate to how you are feeling. I felt the same way, I wanted people to know how horrible of a person this OW was. ( in my case, she was a 20 year old "missionary" and I wanted her parents to understand what she had actually been doing the entire time she was there; partying, cocaine binges, sleeping around etc). She had continued to torment me for 3 weeks after dday with calls, texts etc, so yes, I wanted her to hurt.
I'm not proud of it now, but I sent a letter to a few influential people in her life to inform them of the path she had taken while supposedly on this "mission trip", as she was set to return next year for the same purpose.
2 days later I got threatened with a non official cease and desist email stating that I was being threatened with a defamation of character lawsuit...so, that happened...
I sent her an email back saying that I would back off, and I haven't heard anything more.
My advice, if you feel so compelled to send letters, just get REALLY clear on the libel and slander rules, and don't commit them...otherwise, she could potentially take you to court.
I totally understand the urge though, but don't send any letters while you are enraged or highly emotional. That much I have learned.
BS ( Me)- 28
D-Day May 1 2013
D-Day#2 Aug. 7th 2013
in R and working at it