Just Found Out
User Topic: Interesting 180 observation
Member # 40306
Default  Posted: 8:42 AM, August 26th (Monday)

So...overall I'm sucking at the 180.

BUT the one thing I've done really well at the last two days is not bringing up the marriage/issues/affair etc at all.

What I have found is that the less I talk about it, the more he does!

So...I guess that's a good thing!

Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 aka CAT- colossal asshat; Married 22 years
D-day: July 17, 2013, with TT to follow
D filed July 16, 2014, 363 days later than I should have
Psalms 27:14
Wait for The Lord; be strong and take heart. Wait for the Lord.

Posts: 1838 | Registered: Aug 2013
Member # 40202
Default  Posted: 9:45 AM, August 26th (Monday)

nekorb. If the WS is talking, that's a plus. When I mess up, I reread the 33 steps and start over. Remember, the 180 is about you feeling better about yourself. If you are able to not dwell on the A, then in reality, you are getting better.

“The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.”
― Maya Angelou

Posts: 84 | Registered: Aug 2013
Member # 39780
Default  Posted: 2:31 PM, August 26th (Monday)

I started trying the 180 last night. Very hard, and after he went to sleep I went in the other room and cried, loud heaving sobs for 30 minutes in the middle of the floor until 4am before going to sleep.

A question I have is am I supposed to withhold affection or sex? That sounds wrong.

BS 49
WS 61
OW 31 now - 23-24 when it began
M 13+ together 16
HIS DC: D-33,S-25,S-22
MINE: 0 -he was too old to have C at 44, but had OC at 57
LTA: EA 1-2yr then 1.5 after pa end
LTA: PA 3.5-4 yrs

Posts: 98 | Registered: Jul 2013
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 6:55 PM, August 26th (Monday)

nekorb - You're doing well, take it easy on yourself and practice practice practice.

On the affection and sex question, about reading it again

and see how it feels while you're reading it.

Just bumped some good threads - the ones with the "target" icons.

[This message edited by jjct at 7:01 PM, August 26th (Monday)]

Posts: 6684 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
Topic Posts: 4