User Topic: Inappropriate Facebook message
Member # 32919
Default  Posted: 11:24 AM, August 26th (Monday)

Today I received an inappropriate Facebook message from someone in my "friends". He is a work associate that I have very little contact with and there has never been any indication whatsoever that we had more than a distant professional relationship. The message just seemed really out of character. My first move was to unfriend him and I am now debating whether or not to contact his girlfriend about the message. The one thing stopping me is that it just seems so odd and I don't know what to think. Should I contact this work associate and ask him about it, or should I just tell the girlfriend?

Me - BS 50
Him - WS 49
SOW - 52 destitute loser
D-day 1/28/11

Posts: 577 | Registered: Jul 2011
Member # 29341
Default  Posted: 11:27 AM, August 26th (Monday)

Was it very generic? It could be a spam message if someone hacked him.

We're both in our 30s. One awesome 4-year-old daughter.

Posts: 6809 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Somewhere in the South
Member # 39971
Default  Posted: 11:29 AM, August 26th (Monday)

Ask him if you were the intended recipient. It could be a hack or it could be inappropriate and intended for you. If so tell him its unwanted and unfriend.

Me BS (41)
Him WH (45). EA and possible PA (denied)
D Day 7/21/2013
M 8 years - filing for D

**The cruelest lies are often told in silence- Robert Louis Stevenson

Posts: 115 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: New Zealand
Member # 27879
Default  Posted: 11:34 AM, August 26th (Monday)

My first thought was that it might not have been meant for you.

Me: XWS, 30s, 5-month EA/PA in '09-'10
Husband: XBS, 40s
No kids

Married 2.5 years
D-day 3/6/10
Divorced 5/14/10


Posts: 2232 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: the cat's meow
Member # 38121
Default  Posted: 12:37 PM, August 26th (Monday)

It sounds as though he got hacked. His chances of 'scoring' with a married, distant, work-only related acquaintenace - out of the wild blue younder - just seems like total folly.

I'm betting he got hacked.

Be careful - that 'knight in shining armor' may very well be nothing more than an assclown wrapped in tin foil.
ME: 50+ years old and cute as a button :-)
Ex-WBF: Just a lying, cheating, gravy-sucking pig - and I left him in 2012.

Posts: 1819 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: USA
Member # 40264
Default  Posted: 12:42 PM, August 26th (Monday)

Ask him if you were the intended recipient

This has happened to me and I responded with "Hey FB friend, I think this got sent to me by accident" or something like that.

He apologized and tightened up security on his fb account.

Me-BW Him - WH
Married 6 years, together 13+ years
D-Day Summer 2013
If it is what it is then what is it?

**If I edit I'm correcting a typo!**

Posts: 384 | Registered: Aug 2013
Member # 39996
Default  Posted: 12:50 PM, August 26th (Monday)

Never...I wish I could share your feelings that this sort of thing is way out in left field. That is EXACTLY how my RWH OW started this whole damn mess. He left it alone thinking the same thing you did.....until it happened again but this time they were at a meeting together in a different country for the first time ever and she cornered him near the washrooms and stuck her tongue down his throat....honest to god. He didn't see this coming, sometimes agendas are hidden as well as secret love wishes.

Sure this may have been meant for someone else or they could have been hacked....

1) ASK outright
2) don't assume yourself into inaction.
3) Inaction can lead to far serious the cowork feeling my hubbys inactions deserved her reactions.


Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)

Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!

Posts: 605 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: CDN
Member # 32919
Default  Posted: 1:48 PM, August 26th (Monday)

Thanks everyone. I think that I will go ahead and ask him outright about the message.

Me - BS 50
Him - WS 49
SOW - 52 destitute loser
D-day 1/28/11

Posts: 577 | Registered: Jul 2011
Topic Posts: 8