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User Topic: Really bad day. Not good thoughts!
brokenhearted76
Member
Member # 39616
Default  Posted: 1:47 PM, August 26th (Monday)

Have hit rock bottom today. Just to update, the state I'm in does not have spousal support. So yes right now I am stuck. No I do not have a counselor for various reasons. All I have is this place and all of you.
Caught wh face booking an ex that he got caught cheating with several yrs ago. Telling her how he wished they were together. She said that was his problem and she doesn't want him. I told him to pack his crap and I went outside. Of course he followed. Playing dumb. I confronted him. He tried to say he typed it wrong and didn't mean it that way. Not buying that! Now he is deleting all his msgs he doesn't know I'm looking at his page.
Never thought of self harm or drinking til I pass out..but I am now. Only thing stopping me is my kids. I won't do that to them. But the thoughts and feelings are still there. How do I stop it?! I came here..I have no place else to go.


~Me~ Blindsided wife, age 37
~Him~ XWH, age 37
~Son~ age 14
~Daughter~ age 18, special needs
~Dday~ June 4th 2013
~him: several affairs during our marriage both emotional and physical, latest physical affair in may 2013~

Posts: 84 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: brokenhearted76
crazyblindsided
Member
Member # 35215
Default  Posted: 2:05 PM, August 26th (Monday)

Please sweetie get thee to a doctor and call a crisis hotline if you feel any worse. I did attempt suicide for similar reasons as yours. I caught my WH breaking NC for the 3rd time saying he missed his *insert whores nickname here*

I have 2 kids and even their little precious hearts didn't stop me. I was THAT far gone.

Ask your WH to leave and have a girlfriend or someone you know stay with you until you can collect your thoughts and emotions.

[This message edited by crazyblindsided at 2:06 PM, August 26th (Monday)]


BS/FWS (me):40 Madhatter
WS/BS:42 Serial Cheater
Together 18 years, Married 13
DD(10) DS(7)
DDay(s) 5/08, 5/09, 3/30/12
Final Dday 7/11/14 Affair never ended

Posts: 2266 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: California
FightingBack
Member
Member # 34770
Default  Posted: 2:06 PM, August 26th (Monday)

Hold on Broken hearted. Take deep breaths..Don't think about hurting yourself. Haven't you been hurt enough?

Don't let yourself be hurt anymore. No one can hurt us emotionally if we don't allow it. Detach. Be strong. Your kids need you. Be strong for them and you will benefit from that strength.

I don't mean to minimize how you must be feeling right now. It really sucks. Hugs to you.

((((((Brokenhearted))))))


Me 53
WH 58
Married 25 years
4 children S30,D24, S23,S21
D-Day Nov. 29, 2011
15 year affair with married employee.
Together trying to make sense of it all!

Posts: 719 | Registered: Feb 2012
crazyblindsided
Member
Member # 35215
Default  Posted: 2:07 PM, August 26th (Monday)

say he typed it wrong

Oh and mine tried this too

I am so mad for you!!!


BS/FWS (me):40 Madhatter
WS/BS:42 Serial Cheater
Together 18 years, Married 13
DD(10) DS(7)
DDay(s) 5/08, 5/09, 3/30/12
Final Dday 7/11/14 Affair never ended

Posts: 2266 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: California
Topic Posts: 4