SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
General
User Topic: Lost Trust in Everyone
RavenWood
Member
Member # 39847
Angry  Posted: 9:01 PM, August 26th (Monday)

WW had a 9 month PA before I found out. And is now continuing to have the affair and is running for the hills. So, obviously complete destruction of trust.

But what I really want to talk about is the scum of all humanity.

1) One of her friends (male), who I was on great terms with and also considered friend found out about the affair before I did and said NOTHING to me.
2) We work at the same company different departments. People in her department figured out what was going on before I did and said NOTHING to me.
3) My MIL, FIL, and brother in law took her side, as if there were even sides to be taken... I didn't do anything. In fact I was an awesome husband. They don't even want to talk to me about our kids. @ssholes.
4) My friends and family, the ones I confided in, turned around and told my extended family when I specifically asked them not to. WTF. As if my trust in people wasn't already shattered.
5) My Dad's 2nd marriage wife (who is a piece of work), is telling my WW that I am 50% responsible for the affair and that if it feels good to her she should keep doing it and leave me. B1tch, way to show your true colors.
6) The OM's wife found out before I did. She harassed my WW, but never contacted me to tell me what was going on.

Friends, Family, Coworkers... everyone is scum. No one had the balls to tell me what was going on. And when I shared it with those that didn't know, they abused my trust by telling others or taking the WW side.

Forget trusting another lover ever again - how the hell am I supposed to trust PEOPLE. Stick me in the loony bin.

[This message edited by RavenWood at 7:04 AM, August 27th (Tuesday)]


BS: Me (30s)
WW: Her (30s)
10 year marriage with 2 small children.
Status: Divorced.
DDay: May 2013

Posts: 54 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: RavenWood
kiki1
Member
Member # 37184
Default  Posted: 9:08 PM, August 26th (Monday)

Sorry Ravenwood

I know the feeling. I think probably very many of us were the last to know.

Sorry about all the other crap you have had dumped on you.

Guess its best not to share with anyone in your circle now, but come here. We'll listen and help you best we can.

hugs....


Posts: 553 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: new york
fallingquickly
Member
Member # 36599
Default  Posted: 9:11 PM, August 26th (Monday)

I'm so sorry. I have had much better luck with the people close to me, including in-laws. However, I still don't know how I will ever trust another human being with my heart and soul. I may date someday but I can't imagine letting anyone really matter to me again. It hurts way too much to have your insides torn to shreds.

I know there were people who knew in his business. People who looked me in the eye, socialized with me, and said nothing. On their part it was self interest. If they said anything then it would hurt them or their spouse in the company. Besides, so many of them cheated that it's ridiculous.

But those people really mean nothing. It's the family and friends who did not stand by you. I'm so sorry that you have that added pain.


Me-BW 50
Him-STBXWH

2 Ddays and lots of TT
divorcing

Scars remind us where we've been. They don't have to dictate where we're going. (Criminal Minds)

I saw him, I could not unsee him. -StrongButBroken


Posts: 453 | Registered: Aug 2012
PurpleBirch
Member
Member # 39170
Default  Posted: 9:11 PM, August 26th (Monday)

(((ravenwood)))

You're not completely alone since you've got all of us here. I know what you mean though. Sometimes I just want to take my kids and go live in a bubble!


Me: BS (32)
Him: WH (31)
Married 3 years.
Confessed to PA April 21 2013.

DS (6), DS (18 months)

Aug 30 2013 He gives me back his ring with an ultimatum: "Get over it or get out".

Status: Done like dinner


Posts: 277 | Registered: May 2013 | From: The frozen North, eh?
jimbo25319
Member
Member # 31891
Default  Posted: 10:02 PM, August 26th (Monday)

You're not alone my friend. All of my WW's family are OK with her A and she moving in with the OM.

Our family was close friends with another. My WW's BFF had an A on her H. My WW.distanced herself from her BFF until she decided to end the A and fix their M. I was their as a friend for BFF's H and considered him my friend.

Well during my WW's A, BFF encouraged and assisted my WW in destroying our M and family. In my time of need BFF's husband "doesn't want to take sides". Meanwhile WW's BFF is back running around on her H.

My family has been supportive, but lives over 100 miles away. I feel like I'm on an island all alone. If it wasn't for my son, I'd pack ship and sail off into the sunset. But here I am, trapped.

Feel your pain amigo


Posts: 480 | Registered: Apr 2011 | From: Maryland
Topic Posts: 5