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Divorce/Separation
User Topic: My kids have it all figured out
peridot
Member
Member # 18334
Default  Posted: 12:57 AM, September 2nd (Monday)

My love life that is...

This is actually really sad and I feel so bad for my kids. My DD is 8 years old and my son is 12 years old.

We were watching tv. I don't remember what now but it was something that got my DD to thinking.

So out of the no where, she asks me if I have a boyfriend or if I am married. I asked her where that came from and she tells me she just wants to know.(The kids no nothing about me ever dating and I haven't been able to since my XH walked out of their lives).

I tell her I don't have a boyfriend and I'm not married. At first I thought it was cute and she was just being silly. Apparently she was serious and has given this some thought.

She told me to go online and find a husband because I can find anything online.

The sad part; she hates her dad, says he's not her dad anymore, doesn't ever want to see him again and she needs a new dad.

So we talked about how he would always be her dad even if he's not around and even if she doesn't like him. I told her we can't just replace people.

The more I think about it. She probably got the idea from one of those dating commercials. I don't get on the dating sites when they are around.


I think...therefore, I'm single.

It is what it is.


Posts: 4788 | Registered: Feb 2008
newlysingle
Member
Member # 38735
Default  Posted: 1:13 AM, September 2nd (Monday)

These kids are so smart. I'm sorry thought that she feels that way about her dad. These idiots just have no idea how damaging their selfish choices are. (((peridot and dd)))

[This message edited by newlysingle at 1:14 AM, September 2nd (Monday)]


BW - Me (37)
XWH - (37) The Gnat
OW - Some dumb whore he picked up in another state and moved here here. Known as Hello Kitty.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (5), 1 DS (1 year)
Dday 3/13
Divorced 9/20/13

Posts: 918 | Registered: Mar 2013
Nature_Girl
Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 1:35 AM, September 2nd (Monday)

Your baby girl is looking out for both of you!


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y

Posts: 9821 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
peridot
Member
Member # 18334
Default  Posted: 1:35 AM, September 2nd (Monday)

Early on in our seperation I found out he was going to meet women instead of being where ever he said he was. My DD was only 2 years old at the time. The kids would want to call him. He wouldn't answer the phone. It upset them. They were missing their dad.

It upset my DD so much it would make her sick.

My son has always kept things in, bottled up. He talks sometimes but not much. So I had to help him figure out ways to get rid of the anger when he didn't want to talk. I worry about them and how all this shit is going to affect them later in life.

I reminded my XH early on that I was a child of divorce and he had seen how my relationship with my parents had turned out. Especially my dad because he had walked out of my life.

I tried to get through to him that how he treated the kids now would affect his relationship with them later down the road. He didn't listen.

For awhile, I had hoped that he would change, grow the hell up or just give a damn. I never wanted my kids to have to go through what I did. My parents did a number on me and it took me years to deal with all my issues because of them.

I just hope they don't have self esteem issues because of him.


I think...therefore, I'm single.

It is what it is.


Posts: 4788 | Registered: Feb 2008
tesla
Member
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 7:45 AM, September 2nd (Monday)

I hate watching kids have to process such tough stuff. But they have you looking out for them, so they are already ahead of the game.


"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4683 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
Topic Posts: 5