SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
New Beginnings
User Topic: Finally... actually starting my New Beginning
invictus
Member
Member # 21623
Default  Posted: 11:05 PM, September 13th (Friday)

Well, golly. It's almost the 5 year antiversary of d-day and I'm finally getting around to the independence I started heading for after the divorce.

When I came back to my home town, I rented a house with a friend from my teenaged years; turns out we weren't a good fit as housemates and it only lasted 9 months. (Nothing relationship wise, we were just two gals sharing a house to save money.)

I stayed in the house for 3 more years ... which was stupid, considering it is a 2300 square foot home WAYYYYY out of my affordable range and I have been hemorrhaging money for far too long. I might have been okay, but when the EX was late with alimony, it would throw my finances into the pits and I was hit with late fees, penalties and eventually having to ask family to help me paddle my canoe up the creek... I thank God for my family but it was humiliating to have to ask for help.

Now my lease is up and the owner is selling the rental house and the fresh start is only a few steps away. I am NOT looking forward to the hassles and expense of moving; deciding what goes into storage and what stays within daily reach or changing all the address info,etc.

I am looking forward to not stressing over whether I can pay the rent.

So... I'm going to post this in another place but will say here, when you are just starting out and you are flat broke and don't know what in Hades you're going to do ... check out low income housing. Honestly, if you're low income, do whatever you have to in order to live within your means. Nobody needs the stress of finances added on top to the complicated healing process of being betrayed and losing what you believed was "until death do us part."

Lastly, a chuckle. When I was a little kid and FIRST heard about the concept of divorce, I couldn't wrap my head around it at ALL... I actually envisioned a bride and groom... breaking vows in front of a congregation of people in church, giving back rings, walking backwards up the aisle and ending the marriage.

Kids can be silly. (I'm still a kid at heart!)


♥ One should rather die than be betrayed. There is no deceit in death. It delivers precisely what it has promised. Betrayal, though ... betrayal is the willful slaughter of hope. ~Steven Deitz

Posts: 1856 | Registered: Nov 2008 | From: Texas
259
Member
Member # 22860
Default  Posted: 1:32 AM, September 14th (Saturday)

kinda off topic but not really

I would really enjoy doing that kind of divorce lol

I would have loved to have all our family and friends there while he walked backwards haha

sounds really a healthy way to do it - you could be onto something there. instead they get to do the divorce thing without the public (their family and friends) condemnation.

sounds way good to me :)

disclaimer: yes I am nuts


Me = FBS
Him = gone


things that happen in my life do not define who I am. I get to choose to be the best I can be, for me. cause I'm worth it.


Posts: 286 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: my happy place (most of the time)
invictus
Member
Member # 21623
Default  Posted: 5:46 PM, September 14th (Saturday)

That's okay -- I'm nuts too! makes life lots easier than being not-nuts!


♥ One should rather die than be betrayed. There is no deceit in death. It delivers precisely what it has promised. Betrayal, though ... betrayal is the willful slaughter of hope. ~Steven Deitz

Posts: 1856 | Registered: Nov 2008 | From: Texas
PurpleRose
Member
Member # 33129
Default  Posted: 5:54 PM, September 14th (Saturday)

That mental image is priceless.

That is definitely how a divorce should have to go- all of your friends and family have to come and listen to the preacher tell everyone why you are divorcing your spouse.

"We are gathered here today to dissolve the holy union of Purple Rose and The Dooosh.

Purple Rose, do you promise to divorce this Dooosh because he is a lying cheater?"


"I do."

"Dooosh, you promise to divorce PR because you are a lying cheater? And do you promise to pay CS on time and in full, to leave her alone and never harass or upset her until death do you part?"

"I do."

"I now pronounce you two divorced! PR, you may kick the Doosh in the nuts!"

And the crowd goes wild.....

[This message edited by PurpleRose at 5:55 PM, September 14th (Saturday)]


divorced the Dooosh
*****************************
even if you find your voice,
sometimes it does not matter anymore,
when you speak to a man who is deaf by choice.
~dodinsky

Posts: 3224 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: ATX
Topic Posts: 4