SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
Reconciliation
User Topic: Seeing that sliver of hope
Markay81
New Member
Member # 39387
Default  Posted: 3:47 AM, September 15th (Sunday)

Although Im still working through my "Not Fair" state of mind, I wanted to share something good. To anybody on the outside this would not mean much. I know you all will get it.
About 2 weeks ago we was doing some yard clean up. After the truck was loaded up WH and our son ran to the dump. I couldnt figure out why it was taking them so long so I call. WH tell me a guy who works with him was moving so they stopped by to see if he needed anymore help. I asked why he didn't call me and let me know. H says didn't think it was a big deal. I say it is a big deal and we hang up. They get home and H asks me why Im so upset. I say because he didn't tell me his plans changed (even just a little). He says "So I have to tell you EVERY time plans change? Even on things like that? Well I started to say no not all the time just... Heck yeah you need to tell me! You went months lying & deceiving me. Remember, you out of town for work going "Oh babe Im tired Im just gonna take a shower and head to bed Ill call you tomorrow." Then go to the bar and hang out with your girlfriend. He tells me hes sorry. Now Im thinking yeah right, your not hearing me, your just not getting it. Well everyone he did hear me. He will call every single time he leaves the shop or rig. Heck he even lets me know if he changes his mind and goes to Arbys instead of McDonalds lol.
He has been so good handling my requests, triggers & mood swings. He is being really attentive to my needs. Not perfect but he is trying and doing. Even before A he was a very selfish man. I wasn't even in the top 5 of his priority list. But now I am seeing these changes. He is making me, the kids and our marriage his #1. Even when it interferes with hunting season lol. I wanted to put this out there. Because even know all the crap that was, is and will be for a very long time I do see a sliver of hope. I see signs that it does not have to be the way its always been.


Ugh! Sometimes reality sucks.
BS (me) 31
WH (him) 33
OW - married Bar Whore Rig Rat
Married 14 years
3 amazing kids
DDay-3/03/2013 TT.The whole truth came out(hopefully) 06/09/2013
Currently on the roller coaster of R.

Posts: 48 | Registered: May 2013
AFrayedKnot
Member
Member # 36622
Default  Posted: 5:40 AM, September 15th (Sunday)

Heck he even lets me know if he changes his mind and goes to Arbys instead of McDonalds lol.

That's awesome. Not only did he hear it and get it, he is thinking about you everywhere he goes. There is no out of sight out of mind any more . This is what was so meaningful to me. I love hearing things like this.


BS 40
fWS 36 (SurprisinglyOkay)
DD DS
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better.
"Knowing is half the battle"

Posts: 2629 | Registered: Aug 2012
Topic Posts: 2