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User Topic: Is it the parents fault when people go postal?
idkam
Member
Member # 18375
Default  Posted: 7:58 PM, September 16th (Monday)

My SO and i are having a heated discussion about what happen in DC today...he said it is the parents fault when a grown ass man go postal and kill 12 people...i say the person made a conscious decision to shoot those people... When do people stop blaming the parents?

I eaid to say it was the parents fault take the accountability from the perpetrator...

What say you?


People come into your life for a Reason, Season or a Lifetime..
Divorced

Posts: 1770 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Texas
GabyBaby
Member
Member # 26928
Default  Posted: 8:00 PM, September 16th (Monday)

I agree with you.


Me - 42
SorryInSac - WH#2 - 47. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4yrs, together 7yrs total

DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
5 Furkids (3 Dogs, 2 Cats)

WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW)
Legally married 18yrs, together 16.5yrs

Note: I edit often for typos/clarity.


Posts: 6063 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
idkam
Member
Member # 18375
Default  Posted: 8:35 PM, September 16th (Monday)

Edited for errors...

What i meant to say was:
When people say its the parents fault they take the accountability from the perpetrator...


People come into your life for a Reason, Season or a Lifetime..
Divorced

Posts: 1770 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Texas
NotDefeatedYet
Member
Member # 33642
Default  Posted: 9:08 PM, September 16th (Monday)

Personal responsibility seems to be a term unknown to many.


"It's a fool that looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart."

Posts: 766 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Texas
heartbroken0903
Member
Member # 27879
Default  Posted: 9:16 PM, September 16th (Monday)

I agree with you, and I think it's a shame when parents (in most cases) do the very best they can to raise decent children and yet they, the parents, are blamed for their offspring's horrible behavior/choices. It's too bad.


Me: WS, 30s
XH: BS, 40s
No kids

Married 2.5 years
D-day 3/6/10
Divorced 5/14/10

Reconciling after divorce

"Someday you'll look back on all these days
And all this pain is gonna be invisible." - Hunter Hayes, "Invisible"


Posts: 2077 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: the cat's meow
Dreamboat
Member
Member # 10506
Default  Posted: 9:24 PM, September 16th (Monday)

No, it is not the parents fault. Now, the parents may have contributed with huge FOO issues, but then again them may not have. And mental illness may also be a contributing issue. I don't know the circumstances here.

But I do know that children brought up in the exact same household with the exact same parents can turn out as polar opposites. Mental issue can play a part, personality can play a part, and just being born as a freaking psychopath or social path can play a part.

But ultimately it comes down to personal responsibility. The exception, IMO, are young persons who do not know they have a mental illness. But if you KNOW you have a mental illness and make a choice to not seek treatment or stop treatment, then that is a choice. And if you then cause personal harm to another person then YOU are responsible. Again, JMHO.


And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine

Posts: 17605 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: A better place :)
lynnm1947
Member
Member # 15300
Default  Posted: 8:22 AM, September 17th (Tuesday)

I read that the gunman killed had been treated by the US for mental problems including paranoia, hearing voices, that sort of thing.


Age: 64..ummmmmmm, no...............65....no...oh, hell born in 1947. You figure it out!

"I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance." Garth Brooks


Posts: 7117 | Registered: Jul 2007 | From: Toronto, Canada
lynnm1947
Member
Member # 15300
Default  Posted: 8:24 AM, September 17th (Tuesday)

But if you KNOW you have a mental illness and make a choice to not seek treatment or stop treatment, then that is a choice. And if you then cause personal harm to another person then YOU are responsible.

Part of the problem is people with mental illnesses often do not realize it. They think everyone else is the problem.


Age: 64..ummmmmmm, no...............65....no...oh, hell born in 1947. You figure it out!

"I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance." Garth Brooks


Posts: 7117 | Registered: Jul 2007 | From: Toronto, Canada
rachelc
Member
Member # 30314
Default  Posted: 8:40 AM, September 17th (Tuesday)

my brother had schizophrenia. I can tell you for sure he didn't know he had a problem. My Mom had him committed, he got out and then took his own life by walking in front of a truck.

Is it my parents fault he had a disease? Don't think so.


his Ddays: 2/10, 7/11
my Ddays: 1/12, 4/12 broken NC 12/12

me: 48
him: 51
4 kiddos in lower 20's

ôSlide the weight from your shoulders and move forward. You are afraid you might forget, but you never will. You will forgive and remember."


Posts: 4481 | Registered: Dec 2010
idkam
Member
Member # 18375
Default  Posted: 8:41 AM, September 17th (Tuesday)

Good points friends..
Dream- i totally agree with what you stated..
Attention to mental disease has been on the back burner for quit some time... Hopefully this will not only get people talking about it but also working to help those with mental issues...


People come into your life for a Reason, Season or a Lifetime..
Divorced

Posts: 1770 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Texas
Topic Posts: 10