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User Topic: She is me....
emotionalgirl
Member
Member # 40184
Default  Posted: 8:07 PM, September 19th (Thursday)

So today I decided to do a bit of on line snooping since I got my hands on OW full name. Came up with her FB account which is open to public view. WH does not do Facebook. I had never seen her or a picture of her and my curiosity peeked....OMG she is me! Same weight, same hair style, same clothing style you name it. Only differences, she is brunette I am redhead, she smokes I don't and she is 6 yrs older. WTF...I don't know wether to be shocked, horrified, or in a sick way flattered that he picked someone who could almost be my twin to have an EA with.


1st D day: Saturday July 20,2013
2nd D day....when the s**t really hit the fan and the truth came out.Saturday August 3,2013
3rd D day: Friday August 16, 2013...NC sent Friday Aug 30 4th D day NOV 11
Me: BS
Him: WH
Married 25 years....finally in R

Posts: 369 | Registered: Aug 2013
cuppacoffee
Member
Member # 39313
Default  Posted: 8:29 PM, September 19th (Thursday)

hugs!


That is how I see the OW too. The husband didn't see it right away but I did.

But remember she is the cheaper version of you. She lacks the class and depth to land a man of her own.

You are the real deal. You are the one that shines.


I'm like a vacuum bag
That holds all that old dirt
Remember that time we said we'd be together forever?
Don't hate me, don't regret me, don't ever forget me
Wherever you go, whatever you do, don't say I never loved you

Posts: 360 | Registered: May 2013
emotionalgirl
Member
Member # 40184
Default  Posted: 8:40 PM, September 19th (Thursday)

Thanks cuppa....I didn't think of it that way, and it definitely helps. I was just so shocked I didn't know how to process this. She looks so like me it is scary,we could truly be twins.


1st D day: Saturday July 20,2013
2nd D day....when the s**t really hit the fan and the truth came out.Saturday August 3,2013
3rd D day: Friday August 16, 2013...NC sent Friday Aug 30 4th D day NOV 11
Me: BS
Him: WH
Married 25 years....finally in R

Posts: 369 | Registered: Aug 2013
cuppacoffee
Member
Member # 39313
Default  Posted: 8:43 PM, September 19th (Thursday)

the OW wears her hair like me. dyes it the same color I did when I was her age (10 years younger). Treated the husband just the same as I did.

He told me it felt like starting over again.


I'm like a vacuum bag
That holds all that old dirt
Remember that time we said we'd be together forever?
Don't hate me, don't regret me, don't ever forget me
Wherever you go, whatever you do, don't say I never loved you

Posts: 360 | Registered: May 2013
Morhurt
Member
Member # 40166
Default  Posted: 2:03 AM, September 20th (Friday)

My H's OW don't really look like me facial feature wise, but other than that, yup. Same build, same hair etc, but like cuppa said.. Not the same!! I have class and integrity, so do you!


Me: BS
Him: FWS
M: 15 years
4 lovely daughters
Working to rebuild.

Posts: 883 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Canada
wannabenormal
Member
Member # 19772
Default  Posted: 2:50 AM, September 20th (Friday)

I have a friend whose H cheated with her 'twin'. I'm sure the twin wasn't as grumpy and bitchy since she wasn't working, taking care of two kids, putting him through school WHILE wondering where he was at after class.

They have since R'd and are quite happy...I guess he wanted a happier 'her', but didn't realize he was part of the problem at the time.



Posts: 14320 | Registered: Jun 2008
betraydtwice
Member
Member # 38921
Default  Posted: 2:34 AM, September 21st (Saturday)

Ya mi ne didn't psychically look like me but reminded me of me in her ways and actions....just a younger version..dumber but younger.

And of course the HAPPY version of me. But of course she didn't have to deal with the asshole...I got that guy


Posts: 148 | Registered: Apr 2013
hopingforhappy
Member
Member # 29288
Default  Posted: 1:35 PM, September 21st (Saturday)

OW was actually more like his mother (a younger version, although she dressed just like his mother did). Creepy.


Me--BW (56)
Him--FWH (53)--5yr. LTA--OW probably BPD
Married 20 years
DS-18, DD-15
Reconciling--but boy is it hard!

Posts: 1264 | Registered: Aug 2010
Amber13
Member
Member # 40505
Default  Posted: 5:19 PM, September 21st (Saturday)

I've noticed this aswell although WH wouldn't agree. Same age, same sort of style. She is much tackier though of course.

Posts: 63 | Registered: Aug 2013
Amber13
Member
Member # 40505
Default  Posted: 5:20 PM, September 21st (Saturday)

Also I wouldn't feel horrified, just "sickly flattered". You are his type of woman, she is just a second class version.

Posts: 63 | Registered: Aug 2013
kickboxer
Member
Member # 39858
Default  Posted: 5:35 PM, September 21st (Saturday)

I also feel like there are similar characteristics between me and 2 (of the 3) OW I've seen pictures of.

We're all about the same age, same length hair, and similar builds. One of them is an old girlfriend from before WH and I met...I found a picture of them together from back then, and couldn't believe the similarities.

In my situation, it looks like he duplicated HER since I met him a full 2 years later. Just another stab wound, honestly.


BW - 42 (Me)
WH - 39 (2 ONS, 6m EA)
Married 13 years, 3 children
DD: 7/13/13
Status: Rugsweeping, I guess.

Posts: 248 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Somewhere Out There
boom2003
New Member
Member # 40175
Default  Posted: 6:47 PM, September 21st (Saturday)

His OW was the complete opposite of me- which hurts a lot more than it really should, I suppose. I guess if he really "missed" me so much he would have gone after someone more like me.

Posts: 5 | Registered: Aug 2013
lovedmesomehim
Member
Member # 25743
Default  Posted: 7:54 PM, September 21st (Saturday)

Well, she's hardly me, but she does look very much like a younger version of me.

When we were still in the throes of D Day week(s) he confessed that this was one of the major attractions. She did EVERYTHING sexually, that he was too afraid to ask of me.

Some aspects of this still bother me. A lot.


Posts: 456 | Registered: Oct 2009
hexed
Member
Member # 19258
Default  Posted: 8:59 PM, September 21st (Saturday)

I've said it many times. OW is the 'lite' version of me.

Similar appearance. Similar hobbies but on a smaller scale. A few years younger. Ect Ect Ect.

I think he was trying to go back to before we had major issues. Guess what? 5+ years later...they have major issues.


But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler


Posts: 8405 | Registered: Apr 2008
Topic Posts: 14