Just Found Out
User Topic: Just a few words of..
Member # 34353
Default  Posted: 10:26 PM, October 4th (Friday)

encouragement to the new ones joining us. I know right now as you have just had your life blown apart it seems like it is never going to get better, you are always going to feel devastated, and you are going to be eating shit sandwiches for breakfast, lunch and dinner, I do want to tell you it does get better. I think whether you end up Ring or Divorcing, time does help some. You will learn to deal with all of this I promise. It wont always feel like a Mac Truck is sitting on your chest. I am a little past 2 yrs out. Things are not perfect, but we are working on it, I can sleep and life has its routine back mostly. We do have a new normal. I promise it will get better

Me: BS
Him: WS
Married since 1985
Parents to 2 adult sons and 3 of the cutest cats you have ever seen
D-day 8/6/11 Truth about ONS and 9/21/11 Truth about EA
Trying to reconcile

Posts: 1647 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: midwest now.
OK now
Member # 14459
Default  Posted: 8:17 AM, October 5th (Saturday)

Good advice jjsr. It also helps to redefine the marriage. The BS has been betrayed in the worst way and their self-esteem is probably in the dumps. I like the comment on doggiediva's posts:
Don't tie your happiness to the tail of somebody else's kite

Be a little selfish and focus on yourself and your own needs.

Posts: 1748 | Registered: May 2007 | From: NC
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 11:14 AM, October 5th (Saturday)

I completely agree. In the beginning it's so hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it absolutely exists.

Cherish those who seek the truth but beware of those who find it. - François-Marie Arouet

Posts: 17864 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Member # 36622
Default  Posted: 4:42 AM, October 6th (Sunday)

BS 40
fWS 36 (SurprisinglyOkay)
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better.
"Knowing is half the battle"

Posts: 2636 | Registered: Aug 2012
Member # 40903
Default  Posted: 12:59 PM, October 7th (Monday)

Your post was encouraging. Thank you! I am one year out from D-day but some days it feels like I just found out and I am still to this day not sure about the R.

Some days it does feel like I will feel this pain forevery!

Me: BW, 37
Him: SO, 37
No children
Committed relationship 13 years
Dday: July, 2012

Posts: 51 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Texas
Member # 34716
Default  Posted: 2:16 PM, October 7th (Monday)

Some days it does feel like I will feel this pain forever

You won't. And it gets less and less. Take it one day at a time. After a while you'll look around and find that you can breathe again. Believe it or not, one day, you'll wake up to a beautiful, joyful day.

My Friends call me Wonderboy--That's Mr. SuperduperWonderboy to you Tred.

Posts: 1296 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Everett
Member # 40791
Default  Posted: 2:32 PM, October 7th (Monday)

Thank you for posting kind words and encouragement jjsr (and everyone else after). You made me smile and reading this thread made my day better. :)

Me: BGF - 29
Him: WBF - 32

I broke up with him and now I am trying to heal.

Hurt me with the truth, but never comfort me with a lie.

Posts: 118 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Sacramento, Ca
Topic Posts: 7