SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
Divorce/Separation
User Topic: Mourning for the old me?
sodamnlost
Member
Member # 37190
Default  Posted: 3:55 PM, October 10th (Thursday)

Dropped off proof WH got his divorce packet today at the courthouse. It felt so casual. Then I got in the van. Flashbacks to my wedding day. I wasn't wishing for a better past though - I wanted soooooo badly to step back in time and warn that me what would happen. Snot city while I drove home. This gets better right?


If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck - it's not a fluffy pink unicorn squirting liquid rainbows, complete with pots of gold out of it's ass.

Posts: 766 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: Nowhere pretty
Pass
Member
Member # 38122
Default  Posted: 7:38 PM, October 10th (Thursday)

It takes a while, but yes: WAY WAY better!

There may be a little more snot in your near future though. ((sodamnlost))


Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
Two sons: Now 11 and 14
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after 17 year marriage, now divorcing!

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous


Posts: 1841 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 7:56 PM, October 10th (Thursday)

((((sodamnlost))))


You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams


Posts: 25073 | Registered: Aug 2011
phmh
Member
Member # 34146
Default  Posted: 8:03 PM, October 10th (Thursday)

(((sodamnlost)))

It does get so much better. It takes time. For me, when I was as early in as you were, I was a huge mess and certain that things would never look up. The day my D was final was one of the worst of my life, but it's only gotten better since then.

You'll find the old you -- the wonderful, fabulous you that you were before your marriage. What are things you gave up, dreams you delayed, interests you never explore? Find some of those and craft a great new life!!!


Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!

Married: 11 years, no kids

The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark. -Michelangelo


Posts: 3318 | Registered: Dec 2011
Williesmom
Member
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 7:59 PM, October 11th (Friday)

It gets better than you could ever imagine. It just takes time.

Hang in there.


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7575 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
Saadnblu
Member
Member # 40361
Default  Posted: 9:08 PM, October 11th (Friday)

((Sodamnlost)) hang in there! When things started to come apart for me in my marriage, I confided in my hairdresser, trying to explain why I was so depressed. She said that some large percentage of her clients were divorced women. I asked if they were ok. She said: they all had a very bad time at first, but they are ALL very very happy now. I try to remember that.


Me: 58, SAHM
Him: 58, LTA 2.5 years
Married 9 years, together 15
Dday: June 11 2013
DD 9 years
Separated

Posts: 57 | Registered: Aug 2013
ruinedandbroken
Member
Member # 29250
Default  Posted: 9:06 AM, October 12th (Saturday)

It gets better but it takes a long time. I too often wish I could go back in time and tell my 18 year old self to RUN!!!!!!!!!!!


“People who cheat feel that life is for the taking, and that everyone deserves happiness no matter what the cost. I must remember these tricks if I ever have my soul surgically removed."
Me: BS 42. Him: WH 41 2 Kids 6&9
Married 14 yrs Together 21

Posts: 1572 | Registered: Aug 2010
Topic Posts: 7