Great point....trust that gut.
I reacted so poorly upon DD...my gut instinct was no where to be found...horrible, horrible, horrible time period. But time has passed and I quickly found my gut again and new found courage too. Your gut is so important...I try to mention that anytime a fellow SI member asks what to do. There is no way I can fully feel what they feel...but if they can get in touch with their gut I recommend they go with that over all other inputs. doesn't mean you have to make life altering decisions with your gut, but it does mean you must investigate that which your gut is indicating is not right.
Why did you post this? What is your gut saying is not lining up correctly?
We are in true R now...it is tentative but true. Stood no chance until I confronted both her AP and his wife...did that separately with some time in between. My wife also had to choose to repent....so my actions alone did not cause R to start....ultimately true R takes effort on both sides.
Absolutely doesn't mean our M will survive this...it just means we are both committed to radical honesty. This will at least give us true facts from which to make future decisions from.
Sucks...but I believe until full light is shed on this R cant take place....didn't in our case anyway.